"So I find this law at work—When I want to do  good, evil is right there with me." -  Rom. 7:21

    Are you not often a mystery to yourself?

    Warm one moment — cold the next!

    Abasing yourself one hour — exalting yourself the following!

    Loving the world, full of it, steeped up to  your head in it today — crying, groaning, and  sighing for a sweet manifestation of the love  of God tomorrow!

    Brought down to nothingness, covered with shame and confusion, on your knees before  you leave your room — filled with pride and self importance before you have got down stairs!

    Despising the world, and willing to give it all  up for one taste of the love of Jesus when in  solitude — trying to grasp it with both hands  when in business!

What a mystery are you! 

Touched by love — and stung with hatred!
Possessing a little wisdom — and a great deal of folly!
Earthly minded — and yet having the affections in heaven!
Pressing forward — and lagging behind!
Full of sloth — and yet taking the kingdom with violence!

    And thus the Spirit, by a process which we may feel  but cannot adequately describe — leads us into the mystery of the two natures perpetually struggling  and striving against each other in the same bosom.  So that one man cannot more differ from another, than the same man differs from himself. 

    But the mystery of the kingdom of heaven is this — that our carnal mind undergoes no alteration, but  maintains a perpetual war with grace. And thus,  the deeper we sink in self abasement under a  sense of our vileness, the higher we rise in a  knowledge of Christ, and the blacker we are in  our own view — the more lovely does Jesus appear.