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Marvin Stalnaker

Forgiveness

Matthew 18:15-20
Marvin Stalnaker September, 11 2022 Video & Audio
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Sermon Transcript

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All right, I want you to take
your Bibles and turn with me to the book of Matthew chapter
18, Matthew 18. I'm gonna be looking, Lord willing,
at verses 15 to 20, and I'm gonna be speaking on this subject,
forgiveness, forgiveness. Now, To bring us up, I'm gonna
start in verse 15, just a second. But to bring us up to that 15th
verse, I wanna read the first 14 verses. Matthew 18, at the same time,
came the disciples unto Jesus, saying, who is the greatest in
the kingdom of heaven? Now, they had somewhat of a thought. that still there was going to
be an earthly kingdom concerning the Lord. And they're his apostles,
disciples, and so they're just wondering, just asking, who's
going to be the greatest in the kingdom? And Jesus called a little
child unto him and set him in the midst of them and said, Verily
I say unto you, except you be converted and become as little
children, You shall not enter into the kingdom of heaven. But
whosoever therefore shall humble himself as this little child,
the same is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven. And whoso
shall receive one such little child in my name receiveth me.
But whosoever shall offend one of these little ones. I looked
that word offend up. Scandalize. Whosoever shall scandalize. Now he's talking, they're talking
about who's gonna be the greatest in the kingdom. And he's gonna
teach them something about humility. These little children he's talking
about, these are pictures and types of his children in this
world. And he said, whoso shall offend
one of these little ones, which believe in me, it were better
for him that a millstone were hanged about his neck and that
he were drowned in the depth of the sea. You know, our Lord
is setting forth here that it's to offend one of his own is a
serious matter. I mean, it's serious. And he said humility, humbleness
before almighty God, kindness, meekness, humbleness before others.
Woe unto the world because of offenses, for it must needs be
that offenses come, but woe to that man by whom the offense
cometh. Wherefore, if I hand or thy foot
offend thee, cut them off, cast them from thee. It's better for
thee to enter into life whole, for maim, rather than having
two hands, two feet to be cast into everlasting fire. If an
eye offend thee, pluck it out, cast it from thee. It's better
for thee to enter into life one eye, rather than having two eyes
to be cast into hell fire. And our Lord is not teaching
humility, you know, the defacing of the body and not teaching
that. Here's what he's saying. Whatever
you count most precious to you, for your sake, for you, you put
that away for the good of others. Whosoever humbleth himself. Take
heed that you despise not one of these little ones. For I say
unto you that in heaven their angels do always behold the face
of the Father which is in heaven. Listen. God's people have ministering
spirits, angels that minister to them. You know, minister,
take care, watch over them. Not permitting anything apart
from the absolute will of Almighty God, anything to happen to them.
Be careful, be cautious, we say. For the Son of Man has come to
save that which was lost. How thank ye if a man have a
hundred sheep, and one of them be gone astray. Doth he not leave
the ninety and nine, and goeth into the mountains, and seeketh
that which is gone astray? And if so be that he find it,
verily I say unto you, he that rejoiceth more of that sheep
than of the ninety and nine which went not astray. Even so, it
is not the will of your Father which is in heaven that one of
these little ones should perish. Now, he's taught us something
here about the spirit in which believers are to walk, a warning
to men to be cautious, be careful, be careful how you treat God's
people. Now, he's taught something of
humility. So when they were talking about who's the greatest, he
said, well, he that humblest himself. Well, now, the reason
I read all that was because of the first word in the 15th verse. Moreover, moreover, and also,
and to add to what I've just said, he just said something
that we needed to hear. And moreover, he said, if thy
brother shall trespass against thee, go and tell him his fault,
between thee and him alone. If he shall hear thee, thou hast
gained thy brother. Now, I'm gonna look at a subject
that is absolutely needful for us to be considering a subject
that we desire instruction upon. The Lord is gonna be teaching
on this subject of forgiveness, forgiveness. It's a subject that
our Lord has dealt with, a subject that we must consider according
to the scriptures. So he said, if a brother trespass,
I looked it up, sins, intentionally or unintentionally, you go talk
to him privately. Now, this, That's offense. I mean, you know, we do things
and say things and look, we're all human. We're all prone to
actions and passions and things like this and there's times that
things happen. And if something has been done
that is offensive, Like I said, intentionally or not intentionally.
Abimelech had some of his men, remember that, they took one
of Abraham's wells and Abimelech didn't even know anything about
it. And Abraham came to him, talked to him, he said, I'm gonna
get this matter settled right here. They talked about it, bam,
it was over. Over. So if something happens,
Our Lord says, if thy brother trespass against thee, intentionally
or not intentionally, go to him privately and express to him
what the situation is. Don't come with a harsh, hard,
railing spirit or go behind his back and spread gossip. We're frail creatures of dust,
fallible. prone to error. Go to him in a friendly, brotherly
way and talk to him and let him hear what you're talking about. Let him hear what's bothering
you and give him an opportunity to express what he did or why
he did it. He may have had a good reason.
for doing what he did, it offended you, but all of a sudden you
may realize that really what he did was the right thing to
do with the circumstances. We don't know all the circumstances.
I don't know why sometimes people do things and I think that was
so uncalled for. That offended me. Well, go talk
to him about it. Just ask him about it. Here again,
when you go to him, don't go over there and go beat him over
the head with a stick. Just go and talk to him in a
friendly way, and if it was something that injured you, offended you, You go to him and y'all talk
about it. You may find out after that whatever offended you, maybe
you were the cause of it. Maybe you were the reason he
had to do something. Who knows? But just go talk to
him, and if you talk about it with a heart of kindness and
respect, and you know, do you know how quickly things can be
over? Let me tell you how quickly they're over. I'm sorry. Forgive me. Bam. It's over, Bear. It's over. It's
done. Man alive. We harbor things and
it's just on and on and on. The drama is just, you know,
and look, go to him and tell him his fault between thee and
him alone. If he shall hear thee, you've
gained a brother. It's over. But, verse 16, if
he will not hear thee, then take with thee one or two more, and
in the mouth of two or three witnesses, every word may be
established. Now if this, if going to him
privately, and listen, this is all you want to do. This is what
you want to do. Just get, let's just get it out in the open.
Let's get it off our chest. Let's talk about it and look,
let's just, let's be brethren. That's what Abraham told Lot.
He said, we're brethren. Bobbin over grass. Grass. Dirt. Dirt. They were all up in the air over
dirt, and Abraham said, Lot, Lot, we're brothers. We're brothers. He realized they had to separate,
you know, had to get those herdsmen apart. He did the right thing.
He said, you take whatever you want. I'll take the other. Now
there's a man who trusted God and Abraham set his eyes toward
Sodom and you know the rest. But he said, here, if you go
to him and he won't hear you, he doesn't hear you, he doesn't
want to reconcile. That's what it is. He just doesn't
want to reconcile. You know, you've talked about
it and maybe there's something he's done. He said, no. No, I
want to be mad. I just, no, I don't want it to be over. I want to just, you know, take
one or two, and in the mouth of two or three witnesses, every
word may be established. What you want to do is you want
to give all the parties Let's just hear this thing. Maybe I
didn't hear it correctly. Maybe I missed something. Maybe
we're not understanding each other. But don't try to get over
there and gang up on him. That's not what I'm saying and
push him back in the corner. Don't leave him no space to honorably
say, I'm sorry. Just all you're wanting. I had
a situation one time where I was gonna have to have a meeting
with somebody, and I called up a good friend of mine, and I
just told him, I said, listen, I got this, I got a meeting that
I gotta have with someone, and I want you to go with me. And
I said, I don't want a cheerleader, I'm not asking for a buddy or
anything, I just want a witness, that's all I want, I want everything
to be up and up, and that was a scriptural thing to do, just
have a witness, but we all understand. Most all misunderstandings at
this point have been reconciled, and you know, two believers,
two people that love God, to believe and professing to know
the Lord, They're thankful that God's chosen them in Christ,
redeemed them by his precious blood, regenerated by his spirit,
and they shun the thought of being a distraction. They don't
want to be. But if the situation just, still,
I mean, you're trying to reconcile and you got two or three of them
that go over there, but still. It says, if he won't hear, verse
16, take two or three in the mouth of two or three witnesses
every word. And then verse 17, it takes it
to the next level. He said, if he shall neglect
to hear them, tell it unto the church. But if he neglect to
hear the church, let him be unto thee as a heathen man and a publican. Now, if the offender, if there's
a situation, and it wasn't resolved privately, and then two or three
witnesses were there, and they, you know, still not, then tell
it to the church. Now, the Apostle Paul was moved
upon by the Spirit of God, turned to 1 Corinthians 6 to set forth
an understanding. Let me say this. When we say
go before the church, we're not gonna take somebody and put them
up here on the front and parade them, you know, air out all the
dirty laundry and stuff like that. We're not going to do that.
That's not what he's talking about. The Apostle Paul was moved in 1 Corinthians
6 to give us some understanding on what is being said here. 1 Corinthians 6, 1-4, dare any
of you having a matter against another go to law before the
unjust and not before the saints? Do you not know that the saints
shall judge the world? And if the world be judged by
you, are you unworthy to judge the smallest matters? What he's
saying is we're going to be seated with Christ. In this world, we'll
be seated with him. He is the judge, and here we're
seated with him. We're not the judges, he's the
judge, but we're one with him. And he said if you're going to
judge the world, and if the world be judged by you, are you unworthy
to judge, now listen to this, the smallest matters. Smallest
matters, I'll guarantee you that, probably I should say 100%, but
I'll say 99.9, 9% of the time, 99.9. These matters are insignificant. I mean, they're a big deal. I
do understand, they're a big deal in our minds, but are they
really a big deal? Again, I go back to, when we
come to leave this world, we're gonna leave this world. I keep
thinking about my mama. I'm sitting there with her, and a lifetime of problems that arose,
and this, that, and the other, and things, and mess, and stuff,
and all of the things that she had gone through, she came down,
laying in that bed a couple of miles up the road from here.
And let me ask you, what did it matter? What did it matter? Nothing. He said, you know that
the saints are going to judge the world, and if the world shall
be judged by you, are you unworthy to judge the smallest matters? Does it really matter? Does it
really matter? No. He said, verse three, know
ye not that we shall judge the angels? How much more things
that pertain to this life. If then ye have judgments of
things pertaining to this life, set them to judge who are least
esteemed in the church. I speak to you shame, is it so
that there's not a wise man among you? When he says go before the
church, he brings some witnesses, but then there, if it comes to
a point, is there not a wise man? Not the whole congregation,
everybody, Yeah, no, not to bring them and embarrass them and stuff
like that. No, but is there not one that can make, call them
this, a wise man, if there's not one among you that shall
be able to judge between his brethren? But brother, goeth
the law with brother, and that before the unbelievers. He said,
is there not, is there not somebody? You know, remember when the apostles,
turn over to Acts 6. Acts chapter six. You remember
when the apostles, it said in Acts six, one to four, the church
after the day of Pentecost, and the apostles were trying to take
care of everything. It says in those days, Acts six,
one, when the number of the disciples were multiplied, there arose
murmuring among the Grecians against the Hebrews because their
widows were neglected in the daily ministration. Then the
12 called the multitude of the disciples unto them and said,
it is not reason that we should leave the word of God to serve
tables. Wherefore, brethren, look ye out among you seven men
of honest report, full of the Holy Ghost and wisdom, whom we
may appoint over this business, but we will give ourselves continually
to prayer and to the ministry of the word. Listen, let me tell
you something. What these men were saying was
this. God's called us to preach. And the responsibility of being
able to prepare, prepare three messages a week is a full plus
time job. Neil, when you got full time,
three messages a week. And what was happening, they
were bringing all these problems to the apostles and the apostles
said, listen, choose out some men of wisdom, good report. men that have proven themselves
and shown themselves to be spiritually minded and considering the scriptures
and let them, we're going to give ourselves to this, this
is the responsibility, this is what we've got to do. So back
in Matthew 18, when it says go before the church and the apostle
Paul explained it on the inspiration of God's spirit, is there not
a wise man among you? Somebody you can go to to make
a call. Okay, we've had some witnesses go, we've heard it,
and make sure everybody understands what it is. Now we may have to
make a judgment call on this. Well, if you go back in Matthew
18, verse 17, if he shall neglect
to hear them, tell it unto the church, if he neglect to hear
the church. let him be unto thee as a heathen man and a publican. If he's not gonna hear, he's
not gonna hear what the scriptures has to say, he has no desire
whatsoever to reconcile, he doesn't wanna, no, no, I wanna be mad. I wanna be mad, I'm not gonna,
no. Just let him be as one that may
not even know the Lord. That's what he's saying. You
realize, you know, a believer has a new heart. He got a new
heart. He got an old man in him. But
there is a new man in every believer. There's a new man there that
knows and follows the Lord. And he's gonna wanna be respectful,
respectful unto God, to his word, to his people. And then the Lord
said in verse 18 of Matthew 18, verily I say unto you, whatsoever
you shall bind on earth shall be bound in heaven, and whatsoever
you shall loose on earth shall be loosed in heaven. Now, what
we need to understand right here is that the Lord's not saying
that men have the capacity to do things or say things or bend
the will of God according to their will, but rather what he's
saying is that when his instruction is followed, When it's followed
according to the scriptures, what he said, then the result
of the matter is directly in accordance with his will. He'll
bless it, is what he's saying. Christ is not going to suffer
his ordinances to be trampled upon. And he states that men
need to hear and know these things don't originate with men, but
are ordained and confirmed in heaven. So these, if there's
a problem, if there's offense, instead of trying to handle it
the way we always think in our mind we ought to handle it, what
saith the Lord? What does the Lord say? Verse
19, again I say unto you, that if two of you shall agree on
earth, as touching anything that they shall ask, it shall be done
for them of my Father which is in heaven." Now, what's he saying
here? Well, he's saying if these things are followed, and he's
telling his church now two things in that 19th verse. First of
all, the regard and the blessedness and privilege of godly unity. If there's an offense somewhere,
And there's been some desire for reconciliation, and the witnesses
have come, and it brought it before a wise man, and if all
of this, where there's unity for the glory of God, for His
glory, for the peace of the assembly. for the unity of God's people,
when there's a regard for godly unity. And that's what God's
people want. They want that, where that joy,
when God's people are united together to call on the Lord. Let's ask the Lord. What do you
think we ought to do? Well, what does God have to say?
What does the Lord have to say? Let's ask the Lord for His direction. They're praying for His guidance
concerning the reconciliation of His people. That's what He's
talking about. Whenever there's a desire for
that, if two of you shall agree on earth as touching anything,
that they shall ask, obviously concerning the agreement of the
revelation of the Lord's will. That's what they're agreeing
on. This is what we want. Not what's best for me, what's
best for my desire. I think, you know, I think everybody
ought to be wearing white shirts. I think everybody ought to be
doing that. Well, that's an opinion. A conviction is found right here. This is what it is. If two of
you agree concerning God's word, not concerning what I think or
you think, concerning what the Lord says, if two of you shall
agree on earth as touching anything that they shall ask, it shall
be done. of them of my Father which is
in heaven. 1 John 5, 14 says, and this is the confidence that
we have in him, that if we ask anything according to his will,
not if we ask anything, but if we ask anything according to
his will, he heareth us. And then in verse 20, he says,
for where two or three are gathered together in my name, there am
I in the midst of them. Now here's, in closing, after
the teaching of the blessedness of believers being united in
prayer and their desire for the Lord's will being done, and we
behold the blessedness of His presence. Now, you know, I've
quoted this, I've done it, talking about where two or three are
gathered together, in my name, I am in the midst of you. when
two or three are gathered together in his name concerning anything,
concerning the reconciliation of a brother, an offense, just
where two or three are gathered together in his name with love
for him, with a yearning for union with him and acting according
to his word, to his glory, where two or three are gathered together
in his name, and especially in public worship. I've said before,
two or three, surely there's two or three here. I'm convinced
that we've come together in his name, according to his character,
according to the revelation of his word, to honor him, to preach
his gospel, and be one with one another, seeking his instruction. Then this is the promise we have. There am I in the midst of them. So when we're talking about the
Lord's glory, the Lord's honor, these offenses that come, and
we come together as brethren, and we're seeking God's direction. Lord, help us. Help us, heal
us. Heal our family. Lord, have mercy
upon us. He said, I'm there. He hears,
the Lord, he's promised his real, actual presence. I know we don't
see him with the natural eye, but his presence is as true as
his word is true. Brethren, last verse right here.
Turn to Colossians 3. Colossians chapter 3. We're talking
about forgiveness. And when I say forgiveness, I'll
just sum it up. For the glory of God to put an
end to these things that get under our skin, these things
that are so fleeting and they have nothing to do with the glory
of Christ, the gospel of the Lord Jesus Christ. It's just
petty, petty, these smallest things. Colossians 3, verses
12 and 13. Put on, therefore, as the elect
of God, holy, holy in Christ, beloved, vows are our heart of
mercies, kindness, humbleness of mind, meekness, that submissiveness
unto the Lord. Meek, not weak, but meek, submissive. Long-suffering, forbearing one
another and forgiving one another. If any man have a quarrel against
any, even as Christ forgave you, so also do ye. That's pretty plain, isn't it? If there's a problem, between
two brothers, two sisters of Christ, brethren. Go to them
for the glory of God, for the sake of the assembly, the peace
and comfort of the assembly. I mean, we ought to be able to
come here and worship. This ought to be a haven, a haven
for us. May the Lord bless these words
to our heart for His glory and our good, amen. All right, let's
take just a few minutes break.
Marvin Stalnaker
About Marvin Stalnaker
Marvin Stalnaker is pastor of Katy Baptist Church of Fairmont, WV. He can be contacted by mail at P.O. Box 185, Farmington, WV 26571, by church telephone: (681) 758-4021 by cell phone: (615) 405-7069 or by email at marvindstalnaker@gmail.com.
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