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Marvin Stalnaker

A Faithful Friend

Proverbs 27:5-6
Marvin Stalnaker February, 13 2022 Video & Audio
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In the sermon titled "A Faithful Friend," Marvin Stalnaker addresses the theological concept of love as expressed through rebuke and correction, firmly rooted in Scripture. He argues that open rebuke, when administered lovingly, is preferable to concealed affection, as it aids in spiritual growth and corrective instruction. Stalnaker references Proverbs 27:5-6 and Leviticus 19:17 to highlight the necessity of faithful correction, equating neglecting to provide such correction to hatred. The practical significance of this doctrine is underscored by depicting God's own rebuke through Christ's redemptive work as the ultimate act of love, leading believers to understand that loving correction, both in parental contexts and within the church, reflects God's care for His people.

Key Quotes

“Open rebuke is better than secret love.”

“Failure to lovingly correct one that we love, failing to speak or act in a correcting way for fear of grieving him, actually, according to the Scriptures, is to hate him.”

“The kisses of an enemy are deceitful.”

“I need a friend that's gonna be honest with me... for the sake of my eternal soul.”

Sermon Transcript

Auto-generated transcript • May contain errors

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Let's take our Bibles and turn
with me to the book of Proverbs, chapter 27. Proverbs 27. Our passage today, the Spirit
of God has been pleased to give us some instruction on the exhibition
of love, love. The scripture says in verse 5,
open rebuke is better than secret love. Faithful are the wounds of a
friend, but the kisses of an enemy are deceitful. Open rebuke, uncovered reproof
is better than secret love. That is love that's carefully
concealed. Now the key to this passage of
scripture, key word, love. Love. You know, open rebuke may
be done in a malicious way. to get back. You did it to me, I'm going to
do this to you. But open rebuke, apart from love, does nothing
but just deepen the wedge between two people, but faithful, kind,
loving rebuke. for the well-being of the one
loved is better than a hidden or concealed love. It's better. Failure to lovingly correct one
that we love, failing to speak or act in a correcting way for
fear of grieving him, losing his friendship, actually according
to the Scriptures, is to hate him. Leviticus 19.17, Thou shalt
not hate thy brother in thine heart. Thou shalt in any wise
rebuke thy neighbor and not suffer sin upon him. In the margin it
says, and not bear sin for him. Not sin against him by not lovingly
Helping him. Helping him. Helping him. Rebuke
him. You know, we may say to ourselves,
well, I don't hate those in my heart that, you know, I failed
to scripturally help with kind, loving, rebuke, but according
to scriptures, to leave him to himself, to not help him. I mean, the word is love. That's the word. The scripture
reveals that's hate him in your heart. The best thing in the
world that we can do for a friend is lovingly, kindly, scripturally,
I know that word sounds hard and you think, well, you know,
I mean, you know, really, I mean, get on to him. No, it's to help
him, to correct him, lovingly correct him, you know. Loving rebuke starts in the family. We're admonished to correct our
children. You know, scripture says, he
that spareth his rod, hateth his son. But he that loveth him
chasteneth him betimes, that is, diligently. That's Proverbs
13, 24. Ephesians 6, I guarantee you,
I've told you this before. You talk about a scripture, if
you'd ask one of my kids, what's a scripture you remember most
hearing that you mostly heard when you was growing up? This
is it right here. Children, Ephesians 6, 1. Children,
obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. Honor thy
father and mother, which is the first commandment, with promise
that it may be well with thee, that thou mayest live long on
the earth. And ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath. How
do you not do that? Bring them up in the nurture
and admonition of the Lord. When we love our children, we
rebuke them, correct them lovingly. I'm not saying abuse them, but
don't leave them to themselves. I tell my kids, you know, you're
mine and I love you. And because I love you, I'm going
to correct you. I'm going to try to teach you something. I
tell my kids, I say, let me tell you something. There's two kinds
of people that don't want to be around unruly children. There's
two kinds of people. Adults and other kids. Pretty well covers everybody,
doesn't it? Nobody wants to be around. Open rebuke. Open rebuke is better than I
love my children too much to correct them. Scripture reveals that to be
nothing more than hatred, hatred, disobedience, laziness. It's
revealed to be a lack of love for the kids. False love fails
to tell a friend his true need. False love. We can't behold a
more truthful show of love and friendship, loving care, open
rebuke, than to tell them of their need of Christ, their need to hear the word.
This is the best thing that anyone, a believer, could do for a friend. You know, when the Lord Met a
woman at the well in the city of Sychar. Lord revealed himself
to her. And scripture says she left her
water pot. She's going there to get some
water. Lord spoke to her. Revealed to her who he was, who
she was. Go get your husband. I don't
have one. She said, no, he's the one you're
living with right now, not your husband. All the others, you've
had five other husbands. She left her water pot, she went
back in the city, and scripture says, she went her way into the
city and saith to the man, come, see a man which told me all things
that ever I did, is not this the Christ? Chastisement, open chastisement,
open rebuke, chastisement, it's a mark of sonship. I want you
to come hear this man. Won't you hear this man? Won't
you hear what he's done for me? He told me everything I've ever
done. This, surely, this is the Christ
right here. Now how does the Lord chastise
and scourge every son he receives? You know, that's what the scripture
says, for whom the Lord loveth. He chasteneth and scourgeth every
son he receiveth. That's what the scripture says.
How does he do that? Well, I can tell you the first
thing he does. Here's the first mark of loving rebuke, loving
chastisement. He gets them under the sound
of the gospel and he teaches them of himself. That's the mark of an object
of God's mercy. He gets them under the truth,
the gospel, the power of God, under salvation. This is why
we bring you, you that raised your kids here. I know many of
you have. You did the right thing. You did the right thing. Bring
them under it. Let them hear the gospel. This
is the only hope they got. Why'd you do that? You love them.
You love them. Why do you, why do you, you want,
they've grown up now. Why do you want them to come?
Why do you want to come? Why do you want them to come?
You love them, that's why. Loving rebuke, it's better. You know, we invite them, and
I know the Lord's gonna have to draw, I know that, I know
that. But I tell you this, it just,
We invite them, we tell them, you know, come, I want you to,
come hear a man that told me everything I ever did. Oh, the display of God's love
for his people. The elect, the sheep chosen in
Christ. Those that he's loved everlastingly.
The love that he has exhibited. The love that He exhibited in
rebuking them. Now you talk about love. You
talk about loving rebuke. Open rebuke. The greatest display
of God Almighty loving us, loving His people. The greatest exhibition
of open rebuke to us. the deserving ones, the greatest
exhibition of open rebuke, the crucifixion. Almighty God dealt with us, His
people, His elect, the chosen, in the person of the Lord Jesus
Christ. That rebuke, whose sin was Christ
made? Why did he die? Because God loved
his people. Listen to this, Romans 5.8, but
God commendeth, introduced, exhibited his love toward us in that while
we were yet sinners, Christ died for us. Greatest exhibition of
open rebuke Who needed the rebuke? Pat, me, you, you, you. Who deserved it? Who received it? Christ. That open, revealed, discovered
rebuke of our sins set forth when Christ put away the debt,
God openly rebuking us, lovingly, in the person of our Redeemer. He willingly laid down His life
for us, and my friend, that's better than secret love, not
disclosed. God leaving us to ourselves.
Better, oh, for by the blood of Christ, there is therefore
now no condemnation to them which be in Christ Jesus. Who is he
that condemneth? Christ died, yea, rather, that
is risen again, who is even at the right hand of God, who also
maketh intercession for us. Faithful, the scripture says,
verse 6. Faithful, supportive, building
up. Are the wounds, are the loving
reproofs of a friend. Faithful. Faithful are the wounds of a
friend. One who cares. A friend. I looked it up. What is it? One
who cares. A friend. He cares. 1 Peter 5, 7, casting all your
care upon him, he careth for you. Faithful are the wounds
of a friend. The Lord said, I'm your friend. You do the things I say. What
do we do? We believe him. We trust him. We hear him. We
listen. Oh, but the kisses, the kisses of an enemy, like that
fair speech. of that woman in Proverbs 7 had
the attire of a harlot. The kisses. Oh, the false kisses of false
religion. Lie, just lie, lie, lie. Oh, the kisses of an enemy are
deceitful. The Lord was in the garden there,
been praying. Judas walked up to Him, kissed
Him. The Lord said in Luke 22, 48,
Betrayest thou the son of man with a kiss? We, God's sheep,
his foal, we desperately need to be rebuked with the truth,
the truth that exposes our sin, truth that wounds our pride and
puts us in dust. We need that. I need open rebuke. Here's what I need to hear. Job
15, 14 to 16, what is man? I know what the world says. I
know what false religion says. There's a little good in all
man. There's a little good there. We all just need to exercise. We got faith, we just need to
exercise it. You're not really bad people.
Here's what I need to hear. What is man that he should be
clean? And that he that is born of woman,
that he should be righteous? Behold, he putteth no trust in
his saints. Yea, the heavens are not clean
in his sight. How much more abominable and
filthy is man which drinketh iniquity like water? I need hear
that. Because you know why? That's
the way it is. How did God teach me that? A
pharisee taught me that. Oh, you consider the absolute
truth of man's depravity. And then the fallacy of men thinking
or being told that they have the ability or the will to make
themselves clean before God? All you have to do is 1, 2, 3,
4, 5, 6, 7, 8. That's a lie. That's a kiss that
is deceitful. That's deceitful. We're dealing
with men's souls here. God puts no trust in man and
the scripture says even the heavens are not clean, pure in his sight. How much more loathsome, corrupt
is man that drinks iniquity like water. I need the Lord to teach me,
teach me, teach me. Open, effectual, loving rebuke
teaches God's own that the gospel is the power of God unto salvation. I need the Lord to teach me that
hearing the truth of God's sovereignty man's depravity, man's need of
salvation and rescue by the God who is the God of all grace and
mercy. I need to hear that, be taught
that again, open rebuke through the preaching of the gospel that
reveals God Almighty is the I am that I am. It's not that Marvin is the author and finisher of
his faith. I need to hear of him who is
the self-existent, self-sufficient, eternal, unchangeable Jehovah. Him who is the same yesterday,
today, and forever. This is life eternal, the Lord
said, that they might know thee, the only true God, and Jesus
Christ whom thou hast sent. Brethren, sinners, need the fateful
wound, fateful wound of a friend. I need a friend. I need a friend
that's gonna be honest with me. I need a friend that's gonna
stick with me. I need a friend that'll never
leave me, never forsake me, and for the sake of my eternal soul. Tell me the truth. Tell me the truth. Tell me the
truth. Open rebuke is better than secret
love. Fateful are the wounds of a friend,
but the kisses, kisses of deceit, kisses of deceit, oh my. their soul damning. May the Lord
bless this to our hearts for Christ's sake. Amen. All right.
Marvin Stalnaker
About Marvin Stalnaker
Marvin Stalnaker is pastor of Katy Baptist Church of Fairmont, WV. He can be contacted by mail at P.O. Box 185, Farmington, WV 26571, by church telephone: (681) 758-4021 by cell phone: (615) 405-7069 or by email at marvindstalnaker@gmail.com.
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