when I reflect upon what I once was. By James Smith

Psalm 40 verse 2 He drew me up from the pit of destruction, out of the miry bog, and set my feet upon a rock, making my steps secure. How great has been the mercy of God to me, a poor, worthless, ill-deserving worm!

I was born in a land of gospel light when I might have been born in heathen darkness. I was supplied with every temporal mercy and gospel privilege. I was instructed to read God's holy word when I might have been left, like others, in nature's ignorance. I was preserved during the years of my unregeneracy, when many who were born about the time I was, have been cut down and consigned to their final doom.

When I consider my coldness, carelessness, and ingratitude, then I cannot but wonder that the Lord has not long ago disowned me. Blessed be His holy name, whom once He loves, He never leaves, but loves Him to the end. He never changes. Therefore I am not consumed.

I was effectually called by the sovereign grace of God when I was running post-haste to eternal destruction. I was taught by the Holy Spirit about my sinful state, the value of my soul, and the way of escape through my wondrous Saviour. I was spared, notwithstanding my hardness of heart, and frequent rebellions and backslidings. I was brought through innumerable trials, difficulties and distresses to the glory of Jehovah's grace. I was preserved from my depraved heart and the various errors that lead multitudes astray. I was kept by His mighty power in the midst of temptations, persecutions and snares.

When I reflect upon what I once was and see the way the Lord has led me and what he has done for me, I am utterly astonished. Oh, that I would be more humbled, grateful, and thankful. I want to be entirely devoted to Jesus, body, soul, and spirit, that I may glorify him with all my being.

O my soul, lay low before the Lord under a sense of your manifold infirmities and follies, and seek grace from Jesus to live holily, righteously, and usefully in this present evil world. Gracious Saviour, grant unto me more light to see your will, more strength to do your pleasure, and more grace to follow you wherever you go. O give me an increasing love and devotion to you. O make me like you in spirit, temper, and conduct.

Joyfully giving thanks to the Father, who has qualified you to share in the inheritance of the saints in the light. He has rescued us from the dominion of darkness and brought us into the kingdom of his beloved Son, in whom we have redemption, the forgiveness of sins.