I was thinking this week as I
looked over these passages about when Miss Pam had her heart attack.
I mean, she was dead. I was there. Nobody else was
there but me. She was dead. You know, I checked
her pulse. I put my head down on her chest
to see if there was any heartbeat at all. She was dead. Her eyes
were wide open, looking right at me. I knew she was dead. And I can tell you this, there
was no, I have never experienced a greater helplessness than at
that time. And God just kind of let her
stay dead for a little while. till the ambulance people got
there, and then I wasn't sure about what was happening. But,
you know, I would, jumped up on that bed and started, I was
doing everything, I was, you know, it's the only time I've
ever really beat her, like, you know. I was trying to get that heart
pumping again. And I was screaming, oh God! I wasn't very brave. You wouldn't
have been very proud of me. Oh God! Helpless. You were too. You were
dead. You were inactive toward God.
All God has to do is just let you do what you want to do and
you'll go to hell. But there is an irresistible
calling by God. You know, when they got Pam in
the ambulance, and I was asking the driver and the people there,
you know, is there a pulse? Is she alive? Is she alive? And
they're like stone-faced. They're not answering anything.
We get in the ambulance. I'm in the front seat. We pull
out on John Iron. We go about a mile toward Beaumont
Hospital. And out of nowhere, there was
a voice. We've got a pulse! Bless God. Yeah, the miracle
of life. And that's why Paul says in Ephesians
2.1, and you hath he quickened, King James quickened, made alive,
literal. And you hath he made alive who
were dead. Now let me hear you. Yeah, bless God, I was dead. Don't you remember how dead you
were? Dead in sins and trespasses. Why would you shoot up, shoot
up, shoot up, shoot up? Spend all of your money, your
life, your mess dead, hopeless, dead in your sins and trespasses. And then the hound of heaven
came. And something happened. Something
happened on the inside of you. It's called life. It's called
spiritual life. And you began to hate your life. You began to hate what you were
doing. You began to see this is a shipwreck. This is not an
accident getting ready to happen. It's already happened. I am a
total disaster. And then down, down, down. Finally, mom and dad said, can't
come back here. You know, there's a place over
there in Pontiac. That wasn't an accident. That
was a God thing.