If we sing 222 and 266, you can
bet I had something to do with it. That was great. I'm going to
ask you to take your Bibles and turn with me to 1 Corinthians
chapter 7. 1 Corinthians chapter 7. I'd like to try to finish this
chapter tonight. This chapter that the Apostle
Paul has been dealing with concerning the blessed institution of marriage. And he's dealt extensively. Obviously,
the folks at Corinth had asked him some questions. about marriage
and the Apostle Paul, under the inspiration of God's Spirit,
is going to set forth, as he has and shall this evening, the
glorious truth of Almighty God concerning the institution, blessed
institution, God-ordained institution of marriage. Well, obviously,
from his writings, there were some problems that were going
on in the world there at that time and now. Nothing is new. Problems that they would have
then, we'd have now. And so, the Apostle Paul has
been giving some Holy Spirit-ordained admonition concerning marriage
and the problems that come about. As I've said before, when two
people are married, you have to understand, you have two sinners
that are married. And Paul is talking to believers,
but these believers are still weak, frail creatures. And we need some advice. We need some godly advice. Boy, I tell you, when people
ask me questions, especially about marriage, I tell them, that's a hard thing to
deal with. Thank the Lord that the Holy
Spirit moved upon the Apostle Paul to deal with the issues
of marriage. Now, I want us to understand
something. Whenever we read some scripture,
like we're going to look at tonight, and somebody will say, well that
would just be practical Christian living. Okay, I'll go along with you,
it might be practical admonitions, practical truths, practical,
but unless we see the gospel in it. Now you remember this,
no matter if it's me or any other man standing to preach, if you
don't see the glory of the Lord Jesus Christ, then you've missed
hearing the gospel. And if you've missed hearing
the gospel, then the preaching was of no effect. None. It could be true preaching. I
told you about Noah. He built an ark. Noah, his wife,
his three sons, their wives, the animals were in the ark.
God caused it to rain 40 days and 40 nights. All of that's
true. It's not the gospel. The Gospel
is concerning the Lord Jesus Christ. And unless you hear of
Him, as I've said before, just when you hear someone preach,
ask yourself this, where's the Lamb? Where's the Lamb? All these Scriptures are concerning
Christ. So when Paul was giving these
warnings, These admonitions concerning the entering into the bond of
matrimony to God's people, these practical admonitions, I'll go
along with you, but we look at these practical admonitions,
exhortations, in light of Christ, they are set forth to cause the
people of God to understand the sufferings not only between themselves,
but the sufferings concerning the Lord Jesus Christ and the
church in total, concerning the marriage between Christ and His
church. Now you know Paul has been talking
about, you know, that there's a lot less problems if people
are not married. By and large, most everybody,
not everybody, but most everybody here is married, most of us.
But that does not mean it's better to be married than to be unmarried.
Paul set forth that. But I want you to consider something.
When we talk about the problems concerning marriage, hold your
place right there and turn with me to Isaiah 53. Now, we talk
about problems and trials and tribulations being married. I want you to consider the great
bridegroom himself. Now you listen concerning his
suffering. He willingly betrothed us, His
elect, to Himself. What was it going to cost Him?
Isaiah 53 verse 3. Now you listen who this is. This
is God Almighty in human flesh. He is despised and rejected of
men. a man of sorrows and acquainted
with grief, and we hid, as it were, our faces from him. He
was despised and we esteemed him not. Surely he hath borne
our griefs and carried our sorrows, yet we did esteem him stricken,
smitten of God, and afflicted. But he was wounded for our transgressions,
he was bruised for our iniquities. The chastisement of our peace
was upon him, and with his stripes We're healed. What did it cost
Him? It cost Him His life. It cost
Him everything. But for the joy that was set
before Him, He endured the cross. So when we talk about the trials
and the problems of a marriage, you think what it cost the Lord
Jesus Christ. God in human flesh. But not only
are we reminded of the Lord's suffering concerning the marriage
between the Lord and His people. Just be reminded of the promised
trials that we as His people endure because of our marriage
to Him. Look at Hebrews chapter 11. What
does it cost a believer? Hebrews chapter 11. Verse 35. Here's a blessing. Women received
their dead, raised to life again. But listen to this. And others
were tortured, not accepting deliverance, that they might
obtain a better resurrection. Others had trial of cruel mockings
and scourgings, yea, moreover, of bonds and imprisonment. They
were stoned. They were sawn asunder. They
were tempted, they were slain with a sword, they wandered about
in sheepskins, goldskins, being destitute, afflicted, tormented,
of whom the world was not worthy. They wandered in deserts, in
mountains, in dens, in caves of the earth. And these all,
having obtained a good report through faith, received not the
promise, God having provided some better thing for us, that
they without us should not be made perfect." Now what did it
cost them? What's it going to cost you?
What's it going to cost me? The scripture sets forth that
we'll be hated for his namesake. Don't think for one second that
this community is not aware of what's believed here. Don't think
for one second that this community doesn't know it. And I'll tell
you what the community, by and large, thinks. They hate The
message of Christ and Him being glorified and Him being honored
and we get no glory. We get no praise. We get no honor. We are the recipients of His
mercy and compassion and we love it. We love it. We're hated. People were sawn in two, burned, would not recant. What does it
cost a believer? What is a believer going to have
to pay? Look at Luke chapter 14. Luke
14. Luke 14. Look at verse 26, 27. If any man come to me and hate
not his father, his mother, wife, children, brethren, sisters,
yea, his own life also. He cannot be my disciple. And whosoever doth not bear his
cross and come after me cannot, cannot be my disciple. Look at 33. So likewise, whosoever
he be of you that forsaketh not all that he hath, He cannot be
my disciple. What is it going to cost a believer
to be married to the Lord Jesus Christ? Everything. Everything. What if he takes
everything away for his glory and our good? What if he does?
He did it to Job. He did it to Job. And what did
Job say? He said, the Lord gives and the
Lord takes away. Blessed be the name of the Lord. The Apostle Paul is admonishing
the believers at Corinth concerning the trials of marriage. There's
a greater picture involved than just our trial. We have problems,
yes, I realize that. There's trials in the marriage,
in that glorious marriage between the Lord Jesus Christ and His
bride. So back in 1 Corinthians chapter
7, Paul is telling us, be advised. Be advised. Be aware. Paul is not trying to steer believers
to be married or to be celibate. He's not trying to. Either way,
all he's telling them is this. be serious-minded concerning
the state of marriage. There is a price, this glorious
blessing of marriage. I wouldn't want to be not married. Would you, Carl? I don't want
to be unmarried. I want to be married. But I'm
telling you, the Spirit of God is saying, it costs you something. You know, and remember this,
he said in verse 29, 1 Corinthians 7, 29. This I say, brethren,
the time is short. We'd be wise to be mindfully
diligent to give ourselves heartily to the worship of God, to be
heartily involved, seeking, asking, knocking for God's glory and
our good and make the worship of God the priority. Let nothing, nothing take a priority
over the worship of God. Nothing. Nothing. We're going
to stand before God. I was talking to my son, Gabe,
the other day and he was talking to one of his cousins. And they're
about three months apart. And the cousin shows no interest
in the truth. He just told Gabe, he said, I'm
just really not a church person. And Gabe told him, he said, listen
to me. He said, you and I are going to stand before God. He
said, it's going to be over. It's not going to be long. It's
going to be sooner than we think. You know, the older we get, it
doesn't matter how old we get, we still think, well, you know,
I've got a nice long life to live, you know. We're going to
stand before the Lord and the books and the book is going to
be opened. And we're going to hear the judgment
of Him who knows. The time is short. We're in this
world for such a little time, so remember, everything that
we have is temporary. Light of eternity, let's make
use. I love the things that the Lord
has provided for His people. I love to eat. As I told you
before, I like having a nice car. I like a house, I enjoy
that, I enjoy, I enjoy, I like going shopping, I like stuff
like that. I like it. But, let's make sure
that the provisions that the Lord has given for this light,
that we hold them with a very loose hand. Paul says in verse
32, I would have you without carefulness. What he's saying
is this, I would desire you to be free from anxiety. Strive to be as free. Even in
this blessed state of marriage, try to be free from entangling
yourself with this world's care. We are so easily entangled. I'm telling you, none of us are
exempt. Man, there's things that we just
enjoy, all of us enjoy doing. Let's be careful not to let something
else take a priority over the worship of God. To the husbands
here, listen. The husband, you must be obediently
attentive according to the Lord's instruction. concerning the needs
of your wife and of your children. I'm telling you, this is husbands,
you listen. 1 Timothy 5.8, But if any, provide
not for his own, and especially for those of his own house. He
has denied the faith and is worse than an infidel. That passage
always intrigued me. Worse than an unbeliever. How? in the way that you're acting.
You can even find believers that are more honorable taking care
of their family than you can be if you find a believer that's
not doing it. And when he's talking about being
negligent, the physical and spiritual needs of his family, the one
that is responsible, to give sound, scriptural advice from
God's Word, the leader, the head of that family. Us husbands,
we have the responsibility to be leaders, the head of the house. Our wives or our kids ask us
something. My kids ask me something. If
I don't know it, I'm going to say, now hang on just a second.
Just give me a second. May have to call you back. Let
me look it up. Let me see what God has to say about that. And
I'm going to tell them exactly what the Lord has to say. Husbands,
be the head of your household and give sound. Raise up your
children. Teach your wife. Raise up your
kids scripturally. Give them what God has to say. And wives, listen, you are to
be submissive unto your own husbands. A husband that loves you, provides
for you, as I've told husbands, these wives are not dishrags. When I perform a wedding, I'm
going to make sure that that husband knows that that wife
is the queen of the house. She is to be put on a pedestal
and treated with respect. And you talk to her respectfully. And you be kind to her. You cover
her faults. Don't you bring up stuff that
she burns. Don't you be telling anybody.
Don't tell anybody on her. You cover her faults. And guide her and protect her
and walk with her. Don't walk in front of her. Quit
doing that. You walk with her. I tell you,
a wife that has a husband that loves her and respects her and
speaks respectfully to her, she knows that all he's doing, he's
doing for her good. He loves her. He loves her. I
don't want to hurt Glenda. I don't want to. I want to be
respectful to her. It's my wife. She gave up her
name for mine. left her home for me, make home
for me. But wives, submit or adapt yourself
to your own husband. Be discreet, be chaste, be keepers
at home, good, obedient to your own husband that the word of
God be not blasphemed. There are sacrifices to be made. I've told you before, I've heard
women tell me when they want me to perform a wedding, I don't
want to hear anything about obedience. Then you need to get somebody
else to do it then. That would be no problem. No problem whatsoever. This is what God has to say.
And what God has to say supersedes anything you or I have to say.
Whatever the Lord says. Wives, submit. Be submissive. to your own husband. Listen,
you talk about it, but somewhere along the line the husband's
going to have to make a decision because he's the head of the
house. It's his responsibility to make a decision. And once
you've talked about it, y'all both waited out, I'm telling
you husbands, listen to what your wife has to say. Listen
to her. You're going to find she's got
a whole lot better ideas than you think she does. Listen to
what she has to say. But if a decision has to be made,
you make it. And then you live with it. It's
not her fault. It was your responsibility, my
responsibility. So Paul is telling these, you
know, just be mindful of these problems that are going to come
up. So anyway, so now he says this,
it says in verse 35, he said, I'm telling you this for your
own profit not to that cast a snare upon you. I'm not trying to place
undue restrictions upon your burdens that you not be able
to bear, but I'm telling you things for your comfort, for
your profit, things that would relieve you from this world's
distractions. So let's pick up now for just
a few minutes in verse 36. But if any man thinking, what
I'm about to do, he's picking up a subject right here, I forgot
to tell you. He's talking about now when a man and wife, parents,
have a child that is considering being married. This child is
wanting to be married. And Paul is going to deal with
that and then he's going to deal with the last part here in verse
39 and 40 with those that have been married before or those
who are widows or something like that. But let's look at 36. But
if any man think that he behaveth himself uncomely toward his virgin,
that is toward his child, his unmarried child, if she pass
the flower of her age, and need so require, let him do what he
will, he sinneth not, let them marry." Now, let me just tell
you what he just said. Because you're like me, I'm sure.
First time I read that, I thought, I don't even know what he said.
I read it, and I had to go back and re-read it, and re-re-read
it, and read it. But here's what he said. He said,
if any man thinks that he's behaving or acting in an uncomely, a way
that is distracting either to his family or to the gospel when
it's concerning he and his wife's child being married and she's
of marriageable age, but she's getting older. What do you do? Here's what he said. I wrote
it out. I said, if a man's daughter reaches the age of marriage and
desires to be married, the parent should not based on everything
that Paul had been saying. He's been warning about the problems
and warning about the trials that come with marriage. And
Paul is saying, he said, now I want you to take into consideration
everything that I've said concerning a marriage. But if a man and
his wife's child reaches that age of marriage, and she desires
to be married. She has someone, she's fallen
in love with them, and she wants to be married. He said the parent
should not Even considering all these problems that he'd been
talking about, he should not place any undue restrictions
upon the child. That is, he shouldn't withhold
his or the mother's blessing upon the marriage. Neither the
parent nor the couple being married acts in a disrespectful way toward
the Lord if they're married. Paul says, I do know that everything
that I've told you concerning being careful, be aware, be aware
of the problems. But if you have a child, a daughter,
a son, and they desire to be married, don't tell them, say,
well, look, no, no, no, no, uh-uh. Marriage is just too much trouble. There's just too many trials.
I forbid you to be married. Paul said, don't do that. Don't
do that. Listen. parental advice is to be given,
and it should be. And I'll tell you this, children,
it's right, those of you that live at home, it's right that
children, and even those that are grown children, unmarried
children, living at home with their parents, lean heavily upon
your parents and their careful consideration of advice that's
given to you. No parent wants to give a child
bad advice. I want to tell my kids the right
thing. And so therefore, listen, children,
whenever you are in a state of being at home and your parents
are giving you some sound advice, you know, children, obey your
parents in the Lord. This is right. Honor thy father,
thy mother, which is the first commandment with promise, that
it may be well with thee, thou mayest live long on the earth."
Honor them. Respect them. Give reverence
to your parents because they are the ones that the Lord has
placed in your life as the direct ministers. of the Lord to the
children, the parents. It's a responsibility. So you
honor them and you give them that respect as they give you
advice from God's Word. They're set forth as the Lord's
minister to you. Listen to what they have to say.
With that responsibility of children giving careful heed to what the
parents have to say, parents give heed to the advice that
you give. If the child desires, now here's
what the Lord has to say. If the child desires to be married,
one who is of age, and there's no scriptural reason for them
not to be married, Let them marry. That's what he said. Let them
marry. What parent here thinks that
you're going to forbid a child to be married if they're wanting
to be married? And they're of age. They're over
18. You think you're going to stop
them? You think you're going to, I forbid you, you know what
that's going to cause? Rebellion. rebellion, you give
them sound advice. Give them sound advice. But you
remember this, if they are of age and there's no scriptural
reason, there's no scriptural reason for them not to marry,
let them marry. I cannot help now at this point
of thinking concerning the willingness and the joy of the Father, God
the Father, to give His Son to us, His people, and for us, a
Father that would say to His daughter, no I'm not going to
let you marry because I want to keep you from the trials.
Think of the Lord, the Father that gave His only begotten Son. God so loved the world, the arrangement,
the order of man, His people. He loved His people that He gave
His only begotten Son. Do you think the Father was aware? of that which his son would endure?
Do you think he knew? What was the father? The father was willing. This
is what Paul is telling the parents. If your child is willing, and
there's no scriptural reason for them not to be, don't forbid
them. Don't forbid them. Pray for them.
Admonish them. Advise them. But if they're wanting
to be married, let them be married. And concerning the willingness
of the Lord Jesus Christ, to be married. Again, as I've just
said earlier, do you think He knew the problems? Here's what
He said, John 4.34, My meat, My food, My sustenance is to
do the will of Him that sent Me and to finish His work. His work. What was the work of
the Father? The redemption and salvation
of God's elect. So Paul is advising, he says
this, even if a parent is of the opinion that he might be
exposing his child to heartache because of the trials that come
with marriage and the child desires to be married, don't withhold
the blessing of the two becoming married because a worse trial,
a worse temptation, A worse disgrace may occur if you do. Look at
verse 7 here, look at verse 8 and 9. I say therefore to the unmarried
and widows, it's good for them if they abide even as I, but
if they cannot contain, let them marry, for it's better to marry
than to burn. That is, with passion, unchecked
passion. Then Paul says in verse 37 and
38, nevertheless, He that standeth steadfast in
his heart, having no necessity, but hath power over his own will,
and hath so decreed in his heart, that he will keep his virgin
doeth well. So then he that giveth her in
marriage doeth well, but he that giveth her not in marriage doeth
better. Again, this is what the apostle
was saying. If a man is resolved in his heart
and mind to have his daughter unmarried, he desires that she
be unmarried, but obviously based on her wishes also, the daughter's
wishes also to be in that state of singleness and she's made
that known under her father, her mom, that being that just
reason, it's a just reason, she desires not to be married. She
doesn't, at this point in her life, she has no desire to be
married. If she doesn't desire to be married,
and then the father says, I'm in agreement with you. I don't,
you know, that you're not be married. And there's no just
reason for the child to depart. You know, there's no conflict
between the parents and the child. That is to say, conflict because
the parents don't want the child to marry and the child wants
to. There's just no conflict. The child desires not to be married. The parent is in agreement with
her. The parents have resolved in their hearts to keep or to
allow the child within the household, having weighed all the circumstances. He does well. That's what Paul
is saying. He does, you know, I'll tell
you this, he's doing better than if he pressured her to find a
husband. Just find somebody and get out. You're over age, you're
18, go, go on, get. No. If she has no desire to go, and
there's no conflict, and everything's, everybody's fine, I mean, you
know, there's, there's, you know, there can always be problems,
believe me, you know. You know, a house is big enough
for one family. One family, you know that. You
know it. But, if everybody is in agreement, and it works, and
it's in their good, Good, that's fine, you know. There's no hard,
fast, set rule for the giving of a child in marriage. You're
giving one's blessing or withholding that blessing. The issue should
be left to the desire of that one that wants to be married. to the child once. So then, he
that giveth her in marriage doeth well, he that giveth her not
in marriage doeth better. That's what Paul is saying because
of the trials that may come about. So again, we can't speak beyond
that which God has revealed, but let's consider the mercy
and grace of God the Son. Had He not willingly betrothed
us to Himself, Had He not taken us to Himself, there was no hesitancy,
there was no reluctance, there was no question. It was the Father's
will for Him to marry and save us, and it was the Lord's will
that He be made like unto His brethren, be made flesh, be made
sin and suffering, pay our debt. And He is the surety of our salvation. He did that which was pleasing
in the Father's sight and in His sight. And then lastly, verse
39 and 40. We're considering the admonition
of the apostle to the widows and concerning second marriages. Now, look at verse 39-40. The
wife is bound by the law as long as her husband liveth. But if
her husband be dead, she is at liberty to be married to whom
she will only in the Lord. but she is happier if she so
abide after my judgment and I think also that I have the Spirit of
God. Now, unless there's a scriptural
basis for a second marriage, let me tell you what it is. Number one, your spouse died. If they died, or if there has
been unfaithfulness on your partner that they were adultery, or if
one has deserted, abandoned, left for the sake of the gospel,
And they just don't want to be with you. They've found somebody
else and you're not number one to them anymore and they just
leave you. Unless they have died, unless
adultery has been committed, or unless they have abandoned
you and just left you to yourself, then the wife or the husband
is bound to their partner by law. as long as the mate lives. But if they have, then the widow
or the abandoned spouse is free to marry, but Paul admonishes
them to marry in the Lord. Now, when Paul closes with these
words, he says, but she's happier if she so abide. If she stays unmarried or if
she marries in the Lord, that's what he's talking about. If a
believer is found in a position considering remarriage and their
partner's died or they've been forsaken, Then the Lord's exhortation
through the apostle is this, marry a believer or remain unmarried,
but the believer will be happier if she abides by these standards.
Paul declares this is my judgment, but he made this judgment with
the assuredness of having the mind and the spirit of the Lord. But I want to close with this. And this is not original with
me. What I'm about to tell you I
got from Brother Henry Mahan, a man that's much wiser than
I. And I heard some things that
he had to say. And I thought, you know what,
that's some good advice. I'm going to pass it on. What do
you do if you're in a second marriage, and you're married
to one that's not a believer, and when you got married, either
you were or you were not a believer. What do you do right now? Brother
Henry says, if you want to stay with that person, stay with them.
Just stay with them. That's what the scripture says.
Look back at verse 12 and 13. You're not going to go back.
Don't go divorce. Don't end the marriage. Don't
do that. That's what he said. But to the
rest. Speak I, not the Lord, if any
brother hath a wife that believeth not, and she be pleased to dwell
with him, let him not put her away. And the woman that hath
a husband that believeth not, if he be pleased to dwell with
her, let her not leave him. For the unbelieving husband is
sanctified by the wife, the unbelieving wife sanctified by the husband,
Else were the children unclean, but now are they holy. But if
the unbelieving depart, let him depart, a brother or sisters
not under the bondage, in such cases God hath called us to peace. For what knowest thou, O wife,
whether thou shalt save thy husband? That might be the means of the
Lord's saving. Or how knowest thou, O man, whether
thou shalt save thy wife? There's so many situations. that we might find ourselves
in. Somebody says this, what if, what if, what if? Listen, you don't go back. What if you murder somebody?
You know, now you're, now, afterwards, now you did something, you shouldn't
have done it, okay, then the Lord saves you. Then afterwards
you're Savior, but you're still that person. Are you going to
go back and resurrect that person? How are you going to make that
right? You're not. What do you do? You
go on from here. This is where you start. This
is where you are. If you're married, you got married,
and now the Lord saved you, and now maybe your spouse is not
a believer. What do you do? Do they want
to stay with you? Do you want to stay with them? Stay with them. Be
a faithful husband, be a faithful wife to them. Don't go back and think that
you're going to fix it by divorce. Don't do that. The Lord hates
putting away. Don't do that. There's legitimate
lawful reasons for divorce. It's called adultery or abandonment. Don't do that. But we are called
to peace. Be faithful to the hearing of
the gospel. Encourage your spouse to come.
Pray for them. Do that which is acceptable and
right in the sight of the Lord. And may the Lord bless these
words to our hearts for Christ's sake. Amen.