turning your Bible to Matthew
chapter 19. Matthew chapter 19. And I'm using
for a title, if you look up to the top of the page, if you have
the Cambridge that I'm using, many of you do have the Cambridge,
it says at the top of the page in Matthew 19, Christ answers
about divorce and marriage. Divorce and marriage. So I'm
using that as a title. Marriage, divorce, and remarriage. And that's what the Pharisees,
they thought they were going to trap him when they asked him
about a man putting away his wife or vice versa. Now, every
subject that our Lord teaches us about is important. There's
no subject that's not important. But what an important subject
the Lord is pleased to teach us this morning. And I pray that
God will give us ears to hear a word from God our Savior. Now notice how chapter 19 begins. It begins with this familiar
phrase, And it came to pass. And it came to pass. And we know
that our Lord in his earthly ministry, everywhere he went
and everyone he met, met was ordained of God, the steps of
a man or ordained of God, and especially that's true concerning
our Lord Jesus Christ. Everywhere he went, his ministry
was carefully planned, orchestrated from all eternity, right? All eternity. He works all things
after the counsel, after his own will. Everywhere he went,
God purposed it. Everyone he met, when he met
all them people and healed them, that wasn't a chance meeting.
He went there on purpose to meet them. That woman at the well,
you remember he said, I must needs go through Samaria? And
he met that woman. And He had mercy on her, didn't
He? Our Lord works all things after the counsel of His own
will. The Lord Jesus Christ was always about His Father's business,
doing His will, speaking His word. He said, the word that
I speak are not mine, but my Father that sent me. Even at
a young age of 12, the Lord Jesus Christ said to Mary and Joseph,
I must be about my father's business. He was always, he was a businessman,
doing his father's business. Again, on another occasion, he
said to his disciples, My meat is to do the will of Him that
sent me and to finish His work. Then in John chapter 17, the
Lord prayed, Father, I've glorified Thee on the earth, I've glorified
Thee on the earth, I've finished the work You gave me to do. Then on Calvary 3, we know what
He said. He said, It's finished. It's
done. Salvation by God's eternal purpose. To save a people from all their
sin is complete. accomplished, God is satisfied. When he's saying it is finished,
it's the same as saying God is satisfied. God is satisfied. It pleased God to bruise him
in our room and in our stead. And the pleasure of the Lord
shall prosper in his hand. God's well pleased with everything
the Lord Jesus Christ did for us. That's why Paul declared
the gospel is the power of God and the salvation to everyone
that believes. That's why Paul again declared, I'm determined
on nothing among you, but Jesus Christ and Him crucified. And it came to pass. The Lord
finished the work the Father gave Him to do. And then it says
in verse 1 of Matthew 19, And He departed from Galilee and
came into the coast of Judea beyond Jordan, And again we see this repeated
over and over again. Great multitude followed Him
and He healed them there. The Lord had mercy on these poor
and needy sinners. He's nigh unto them of a broken
heart. Save us such as be of a contrite
spirit. The Lord didn't come to call
or to save the righteous people. He came to call and to save sinners. He came to save and to seek those
who were lost. And we've seen this repeated
in the book of Matthew, how multitudes followed Him. Turn back to Matthew
chapter 12. Multitudes followed him and he
had mercy upon them. The Pharisees, Matthew chapter
12, accused him of doing wicked things when he healed a man with
a withered hand. It says in Matthew 12, look at
verse 14, then the Pharisees went out and held a council against
him how they might destroy him. But when Jesus knew it, he withdrew
himself from that and great multitudes followed Him, and He healed them
all. The Lord never turns a mercy
beggar away. Everyone who came to Him seeking
mercy, they went away with mercy received, didn't they? This ought
to highly encourage us and greatly encourage us to come boldly to
the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy and find grace
to help in our time of need. The Lord said, all you who are
laboring and heavy laden, come unto Me, I'll give you rest."
That ought to encourage us, right? Casting all your care upon him
for he careth for you. So great multitudes followed
him and he healed them. When Mark writes about this same
occasion in Mark chapter 10 verse 1, It says there that the Lord
taught them again. So He healed them, and then He
taught them again and again and again. I pray the Lord will do
that for us. Heal us, give us salvation, and
then teach us. We need to be taught, don't we?
Isn't it a privilege to sit at the Lord's feet and to hear His
Word, to hear His Gospel? We need to sit at His feet and
learn of Him, and the Lord's given us this great privilege.
We have what those people in that day didn't have. We have
the completed Word of God, so readily available to us. In book
form, I was this morning sitting on the back porch swinging, drinking
my coffee, and a couple of Scripture verses came to my mind. I didn't
have to go in and grab a Bible. I just had my phone right there
and click, click, there it is. We have it so readily available.
We're so blessed to have the Word of God, to read it, and
to meditate upon it, to receive it, and to believe it. And then
we're blessed in this day to have men sent of God to teach
us. To teach us. The Lord sent me
here to teach you. The Lord taught me, and I want
to teach you what He taught me. Salvation of the Lord. Salvation
of the grace of God alone. Now look at verse 3, and here
comes the attack. Here comes the attack of the
enemies. Now, this is all orchestrated by the Lord. He arranged this meeting. The
Pharisees also came unto Him, tempting Him, saying unto Him,
Is it lawful, is it right for a man to put away his wife for
any reason? for any cause, and then the Lord
took them back to the beginning where marriage was instituted. The Pharisees, we know who they
were, right? The Pharisees were the very self-centered,
self-righteous Jews who hated the Lord Jesus Christ. They were
always seeking to trap him, to entangle him, and plot his death. They went out and held counsel
how they might destroy him. We read that a moment ago. But
everything they did, and all their wickedness, all their plotting
and planning, they only did what God determined before to be done. You remember what the Lord said
of these Pharisees? Turn over here to Matthew 23.
We're going to see this in Matthew 23 when we get over there. but
just to kind of describe to us who these men were and what their
motives were. I mean, their motives were just
wicked. They didn't really want to know
anything about marriage. They just wanted to trap the
Lord and publicly embarrass Him. For example, when the Pharisees
caught that woman in adultery and brought her before the Lord,
And they said, well, the law says, the stoner, what are you
saying? You know, the Lord forgave that
woman. He said to that woman, I don't condemn thee, go and
sin no more. Now, look at these Pharisees.
Here's the same crowd. Matthew 23, 25, where when do
you scribe the Pharisees? Hypocrites. You see it? Hypocrites,
for you may clean the outside of the cup and the platter, but
within you're full of extortion. Thou blind Pharisees, cleanse
first that which is in the cup and platter, that the outside
may be clean also. Woe unto you scribes and Pharisees.
Hypocrites, you're like unto white as sepulchres. which indeed
appear beautiful outward, but within you're full of dead men's
bones and all uncleanness. Even so outwardly you appear
righteous unto men, but within you're full of hypocrisy and
iniquity." They were so full of sin. Our Lord said to them
in another place, you or they would justify yourselves before
men, those Pharisees. But that which is highly esteemed
among men is abomination in the sight of God." And here we see
the attack of the enemy against the Lord, tempting him. They
were not interested in destruction. They were interested in destruction. His. Now here's their question
they give to the Lord about marriage and divorce. Can I divorce my
wife for any trifling reason? As it says there, for every cause
or any cause? Was it lawful for a Jewish believer
to put away his wife for some vain, empty reason, those who
were under the law? No. No, it wasn't. And you can
read the reference there in Deuteronomy 24. And here's what the Lord
does. He uses absolute, unmitigated
wisdom Have you not read, he takes him right back to the word
of God, have you not read from the word of God, and they had
the book of Genesis, that he which made them at the beginning
made them male and female for this cause shall a man leave
father and mother and cleave, that word's a strong word, it
means you get a death grip upon the wife, and then it says, And
they too shall be one flesh. One plus one equals one in this
case. That's new math. They too shall
be one flesh. Wherefore there are no more two,
but one. What therefore God hath joined
together, let not man put asunder. Now, the wise Lord answers their
question by quoting the Word of God, much like He did when
He was tempted those 40 days in the wilderness of Satan. Every
time Satan came after Him and tempted Him, what did the Lord
do? He rebuked Him with the Word of God. He rebuked Him with the
truth of God. You see, it's the Word of God
that's quick and powerful, sharper than any two-edged sword. So
it's always a good thing for us when the enemies would attack
us over the Gospel. What should we come back with?
Thus saith the Lord. Well, I don't know what you think
or what he thinks, but here's what the Lord says at salvation
to the Lord. Salvation to the Lord. The Lord
uses the word of God to quell their attack. The Lord takes
them back to the beginning of creation. Let us make man after
our own likeness, the Trinity. We read Genesis 1, 27 when we
started this morning. So God created man in his own
image, in the image of God created he him male and female, created
he them And God blessed them and God said unto them, be fruitful
and multiply, replenish the earth. That's how God was gonna populate
heaven and earth, or the earth. Well, even heaven in that sense,
but be fruitful and multiply and replenish the earth and subdue
it. God created man perfectly without
sin. He created him holy and upright. He made them male. and female. There are just two
genders in the human race. But because of the fall of Adam
and sin that was brought into humanity, And because of man's
total depravity, we've seen this even perverted in our day. It's so prevalent and so widespread
in our day. Now we have what sin has brought
in, we say, and they use the word transgender. That is, you can be born A man,
and if you want to become a woman through medicine and science,
well you can do the transfer on over. God created man and
woman, they're just two genders. And anything less than that is
an absolute perversion. And it's sad, it's sad what we
see going on through the courts and different things, that some
people want to take a little children who don't know right
from wrong, and try to, through medicine and science and through
the court's legislation, and make a little boy a little girl.
We're perverted. I mean, if there's ever a monument
to man's depravity, it's gotta be in that. It's gotta be in
that. Now we've learned something here
about the original marriage of Adam and Eve. between a man and
a woman. That was God's original institution. And anything other than that
is a perversion of what God had instituted for the good of his
human race. He said, replenish and multiply. multiply the earth. Everything
God has given to us, sinful men have perverted it. They've changed
it. They've perverted it. Every good
gift and perfect gift comes from God, but sinful, wicked men have
ruined it. They've ruined it. I'll give
you four examples. The gospel, first of all, the
gospel of the sovereign grace of God in the Lord Jesus Christ,
salvation by the grace of God alone, salvation through the
accomplishment of the Lord Jesus Christ, perverted men have changed
that message to make salvation dependent upon the sinner instead
of the Savior. That's a perversion. They changed
the message. The second thing that God had
given, not only the gospel, but God has given the ordinance of
the Lord's table. We observed that a couple of
weeks ago. But sinful men have made that ordinance to be salvation
by taking the elements. Did you know that? Some people
actually teach that those elements actually become the body and
blood of Christ, and when you take those elements, you're taking
salvation. That's a perversion, isn't it?
Our Lord said, this do in remembrance of me, not this do to be saved. And then the third thing that
the Lord has given that men have perverted is believer's baptism. Believer's baptism is a means
that God has given to confess that the Lord Jesus Christ is
all of our salvation. We show by confessing Christ
in believer's baptism, we show His death, His burial, and His
resurrection is all of our hope of salvation. That's our public
confession of Christ as all of our salvation. What have men
done? What have men done with that?
They perverted it, haven't they? Sinful religious Pharisees, in
our day, just like in that day, they have made baptism as a way
of putting away sin, and they have made baptism as a way of
regeneration, and they've made water baptism into salvation. That's a perversion, is it not?
We know salvation is in a person, not in a pool, in a person. It's our identification with
Christ. He is all of our salvation. Now
here's the fourth thing. The holy institution of marriage. which God has established. We
read that in Genesis 1 and Genesis 2. God has established for the
good of his people, even that is under attack like it never
has been before. Sinful men have also perverted
that. Marriage. Marriage. We studied
in Hebrews 13. Marriage is honorable and the
marriage bed is undefiled, but whoremongers and adulterers God
will judge. God will judge. I went back and
looked at a message I brought from Mark chapter 10 back 15
years ago. And I said in that message, I
went back and read my notes, and I said in that message that
someday that the laws of this country will be changed about
marriage. And sure enough, In 2015, you
know what happened. Who would ever thought in our
country that local, state, federal governments, even liberal churches
would approve, recognize, even encourage marriage between two
men and two women. They call that same-sex marriage. Is that God's order for marriage? It's not. It's perverted, isn't
it? Even our Supreme Court has changed the definition of what
marriage is in 2015. Now what's so perverted about
that, if you look at the Supreme Court building, there's engraved
all around the Supreme Court building the law of God. And
they say this body of nine judges in robes We're going to dictate
and make our judgments according to the law of God. Well, they
threw that out the window, didn't they? They threw that out the
window. It was a split decision. It wasn't
a unanimous decision. But even our Supreme Court had
changed the definition of what marriage is. And they say, now
you'll marry another man. Maybe you want to marry a horse
or a dog or a cow or something else. I mean, where do you end? Where does it go? Now, I say this with love and
kindness. Homosexuality is an abomination
in the sight of God. Why do we say that? That's what
His Word teaches. That's what His Word teaches.
Romans 1 chapter 1 teaches it plainly. Those who practice such
wicked things, God calls them reprobates. I'm going to love
them. I'm going to pray for them. I'm
going to ask God to have mercy upon them. But I'm not going
to approve what they're doing. It's wicked. It's wicked. It's
wicked. Wicked. Wicked. And I know, apart
from the grace of God, that's me. That's you. That's me and
that's you. Wherefore, look at chapter 19,
verse six. Wherefore, there are no more
two, but one flesh. One flesh. A man shall leave
his father and mother and cleave unto his wife, and they shall
be one flesh. Wherefore, there are no more two, but one. What God hath joined together,
let not man put asunder. Now, verse seven, they say unto
him, why did Moses then command to give a writing of divorcement
to put her away? And he said of them, verse 8,
Moses, because of the hardness of your heart, the wickedness
of your heart, suffered you to put away your wives. But from
the beginning, that wasn't the way it started out, was it? I
say unto you, verse 9, whosoever shall put away his wife, except
it be for fornication, which can mean adultery, infidelity,
unfaithfulness, and shall marry another, commit adultery, and
whosoever marrieth her, which is put away, commits adultery. And the disciple said unto him,
if that be the case with his wife, maybe I just won't get
married. If I've got to stay married,
maybe I just won't get married. Now, let's get down to where
we live. Marriage was ordained and established
by God before Adam sinned against God. Marriage is a holy institution
that God brought about. He said it wasn't good for Adam
to be alone, so he took a rib out of Adam and from Adam he
made Eve. And now The two are one. So marriage, first of all, was
ordained and established by God before Adam ever sinned. Secondly,
marriage is a relationship far superior to any other human relationship. Marriage was chosen by the Lord
to be a typical relationship that exists between Christ and
his church, Christ and the bride. Marriage is a picture of Christ
and his bride. Now turn to Ephesians chapter
5. There are two chapters that are given on marriage, Ephesians
chapter 5 and 1 Corinthians chapter 7. Look at first Ephesians chapter
5, verse 21, submitting yourselves one to another in the fear of
God. Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands as unto
the Lord. For the husband is the head of
the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church. He's the
savior of the body. Therefore, as the church is subject
unto Christ, so let the wives be their own husbands and everything."
Husbands, love your wives. Now, can you love your wife too
much? No. Husband, love your wives, even
as Christ loved the church. and gave himself for it, that
he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water
by the word, that he might present it to himself a glorious church,
not having spot or wrinkle or any such thing, but that it should
be holy without blemish. So ought men to love their wives
as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth
himself. Remember, these two are one. No man ever yet hated
his own flesh. Verse 29, but nourish and cherish
it, even as the Lord the church. Verse 30, for we are members
of his body, of his flesh, and of his bones. We're one with
him. For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother,
and shall be joined unto his wife, and they too shall be one. This is a great mystery, but
I speak concerning Christ and the Church. Nevertheless, let
every one of you in particular so love his wife, even as he
self, and the wife see that she reverence her husband." So, the
marriage relationship between a man and a woman is greater
than any other relationship we have among men. Marriage involves
commitment and devotion. A man ought to be committed to
his wife like Christ is committed to the church. A woman ought
to commit to her husband like a true believer is committed
unto the Lord. So marriage involves commitment.
Biblical marriage I'm talking about now. Marriage involves
sacrifice, self-denial, doesn't it? Husbands, what do they do? They go to work every day. Wives,
they care for the children, don't they? Husbands, they sacrifice
themselves for their family, for their wives, for the children.
The Lord Jesus Christ sacrificed himself for us. Wives are to
surrender themselves unto their husband, just as believers have
surrendered themselves unto the Lord Jesus Christ. Something
else we know, marriage involves love, doesn't it? Love. Love. Husband, love your wives even
as Christ loved the church and gave himself for it. Wives are
to reverence and obey their husbands as the church reverences and
obeys the Lord Jesus Christ. True love is always giving. Giving,
isn't it? Never taking, but always giving. True love is yielding, not demanding. Love is always wanting to give. Love is always wanting to bestow
the best it can on the object of its affection. Marriage necessarily
involves, biblical marriage, necessarily involves suspension. of all other relationships and
a blessed isolation to and with one another in marriage. A blessed
isolation to and with one another like the isolation of Christ
to and with his church. We are going to worship the true
and living God. Believers do not participate
in spiritual idolatry. We're isolated unto the Lord.
And the husband and wife are isolated unto themselves, faithfully
to themselves. Now, it says in verse 6, wherefore
there are no more two but one flesh, what therefore hath God
joined together, let not man put asunder. Now, marriage, now
stay with me, marriage is a lifelong union and commitment to each
other out of love. Love always wishes the best for
one another. We read in 1 Corinthians 13 many
times, love beareth all things, believeth all things, hopeth
all things, endureth all things, this love never fails, never
fails. Now, someone's going to ask,
what about divorce then? Well, look at verse 9, Matthew
19, verse 9, I say unto you, whosoever shall put away his
wife except Now, there is an exception. There is an exception. This lifelong marriage union
can be dissolved lawfully, biblically, scripturally, according to the
Word of God, as it says there in verse 9. Now, let me give
you a scenario here. Turn over here to 1 Corinthians
chapter 7. So can this union be dissolved?
Yes, and we have the reasons given to us here in 1 Corinthians
chapter 7. First of all, this union can
be dissolved by death, by death. If a husband or wife, one of
them dies, she's at liberty or he's at liberty to marry again. So in the case of death, the
wife is bound by the law as long as her husband live it. 1 Corinthians
7 verse 39. The wife is bound by the law
as long as her husband liveth. But if her husband be dead, she's
at liberty to be married to whom she will, only in the Lord. You see that? So in the case
of death, that union is dissolved, right? The second case would
be that, stay right here, 1 Corinthians 7. The second case would be that
of abandonment desertion, I mean by that, or
abuse, abuse. Look at 1 Corinthians chapter
7 and begin reading at verse 12. But to the rest I speak not
the Lord, I speak not the Lord, the rest speak I not the Lord. If a brother hath a wife that
believeth not, and she be pleased to dwell with him, Let him not
put her away, and the woman which hath a husband that believeth
not, if he pleased to dwell with her, let her not leave him. For the unbelieving husband is
sanctified by the wife, or set apart by the wife, and the unbelieving
wife is sanctified by the husband, else were their children unclean,
but now they are holy. But if the unbelieving depart,
Now watch it, let him depart. A brother or sister is not under
bondage in such cases, but God had called us to peace. So there's
that reason of death, or that reason of abandonment, or abuse,
or desertion. And then there's that case of
infidelity, unfaithfulness, adultery, as it says there in verse 9,
over there in our text. Now stay right here in 1 Corinthians
for a minute, The Lord uses the word here, except it be for fornication. And that has referred, that refers
to adultery and unfaithfulness in that marriage, in that marriage
vow. Our Lord does not teach that
men and women ought to get a divorce if one another commits an act
of sexual infidelity. We ought to forgive one another
and to love one another. However, He does teach us that
in such cases, a marriage union may be dissolved. It is permitted
because of the hardness and sinfulness of man's heart. What Moses enacted
and permitted was not given to encourage divorce, but because
of the sinful hardness of our heart. From the beginning, it
was not so. Adam had only one option, and
that was Eve. That was Eve. Let me give you
this in closing. I'm about to wind this up, but
I think this needs to be addressed. The question always comes up
when someone has been divorced in the past, and what about remarriage? Now, go back to 1 Corinthians
7, verse 27. 1 Corinthians 7, verse 27. Art thou bound unto
a wife? Well, seek not to be loosed.
Or thou loosed from a wife, seek not a wife. Now watch it, verse
28. But, and if thou marry, you've
not sinned. And if a virgin marry, she hath
not sinned. Nevertheless, such shall have
trouble in the flesh. Paul said, I would spare you
that. Marriage brings certain responsibility, doesn't it? Paul
advises those who are married by no means should desert one
another nor seek to dissolve a marriage. On the other hand,
if that happens, if they are free from a wife or a husband,
whatever, it would be better not to seek one, but it always
depends upon the circumstances. If a person who has never been
married or one who has legally freed from a wife and think it's
fit to be remarried, He does not commit sin. It is not sin
to be married. Those who choose to be married
shall have other responsibilities and earthly troubles, and Paul
is concerned about those that they might be spared, as it says
there in verse 25. If you're a believer, resting
in the Lord Jesus Christ for all of your salvation, and gone
through marital turmoil, divorce, and remarried, should you go
try to go back and fix that mess? Forget it. Forget it. Forget
it. Absolutely not. forgetting those
things which are behind, and looking forth unto those things
which are before. Brethren, I count not myself
to have apprehended, but this one thing I do, forgetting those
things which are behind, reaching forth unto those things which
are before, I press toward the mark of the prize of the high
calling of God in the Lord Jesus Christ. The blood of the Lord
Jesus Christ cleanses us from all our sins. All our sins. If you're a believer
resting in the Lord Jesus Christ, you're justified from all things
which you could not be justified by the law of Moses. You remember
the Lord said, I must needs go through Samaria, and he met a
woman at the well. And He gave her that water of
life. She'd been married. Remember He said, go call your
husband? She said, I don't have a husband
right now. He said, you're right, you've had five husbands. The
Lord forgave her, didn't He? The blood of Jesus Christ, His
blood justifies us from all our sin. Now, it would be a good
assignment for you Pastor Mahan has a sermon on sermon audio
called How to Have a Happy Marriage. How to Have a Happy Marriage.
And it's one of the most listened to sermons on sermon audio. It's
been listened to over 10,000 times. I've listened to it many
times. But I would give you that assignment
to go listen to that sermon. It would help us. When you do marry or remarry,
as believers, it's always best to marry another believer. She's
at liberty to be married, but only in the Lord. Three things. Secondly, when you get married. Now, we've been married 50 years.
52 years. Almost messed up. We've been
married, this month will be 52 years. Don't expect too much
from your husband or wife. Don't expect her to be a perfect
woman. Don't expect him to be a perfect man. You know why?
We're sinners. We're sinners. Don't expect too
much from your husband or your wife. The marriage union is between
two sinners, not two angels. Now, forgive one another and
love one another. Because of frailties and weakness
of the flesh, we should be always ready to forgive one another.
We use that phrase kiss and make up. Kiss and make up. We've done that over the last
52 years. We've done that over and over
and over and over again. Lastly, in closing, always seek
the spiritual and physical good of one another. Help each other
to be the best Help him to be the best husband he can be. And
husband, help her to be the best wife she can be. Out of love,
out of concern. Always speak respectfully of
your husband and your wife. Don't call her the old lady.
And don't call him the old man. That's my loving husband. You
see what I'm saying? Help each other in this relationship.
Help each other in this relationship. May God help us to honor him
by honoring what he has established and given to us for our good.
He's given us marriage for our good, that we might replenish
and multiply these things.