Proverbs 18, 19, a brother offended
is harder to be won than a strong city, and their contentions are
like the bars of a castle. Now the text doesn't say whether
the brother is right or not to be offended. Some, as we know,
are very easily offended. You know and I know some that
are sort of characterized that way. And that's a shame, considering
the truth of our text, how hard it is to repair. And we all know this about ourselves.
When somebody makes our list, it's all but a permanent list. As our text says, it's not easily
reversed. And when I say that some are
very easily offended, I mean that they're known for it. And
you know that. If you can't think of anyone
like that, then it's probably you. But I think you know what I mean.
You have to walk on eggshells. And some, though, also are known
for being offensive. Always critical, or maybe they're
know-it-alls, or maybe they like to dish dirt on everybody, and
you get the feeling eventually that if they're dishing dirt
to you on everybody else, then they're probably dishing dirt
on you to them also. Or just always have a chip on
the shoulder, everybody knows people like that too, and it's
never us, it's always somebody else, of course. But though there are those who
have a reputation for it, and some who don't, some, you can't
imagine them ever being offended about anything. And they never say anything that's offensive to you. But though there are some who
are known either way, all of us are relatively easily offended
considering the fact that God hasn't put us in hell yet. If you consider that, especially
believers, considering that literally everything we've ever done or
thought or said has been offensive to God. And yet, while we were yet sinners,
Christ died for us. When you consider that, all of
us are easily offended. In fact, since the Lord Jesus
Christ did die for us, though we are worthy of his wrath, there's
no excuse for offense or contention. Those two words
are in our text. The key word in our text this
morning is not there in ink. but it's there nevertheless.
Listen to Ephesians 4.31. Let all bitterness and wrath
and anger and clamor and evil speaking be put away from you
with all malice. And be ye kind one to another,
tenderhearted, Forgiving one another. That's the key word
in our text, isn't it? Even though it's not written
there. Forgiveness. That's what will take down the
bars of the castle. That's what will win the strong
city. Forgiveness, and I'm not talking
about the forgiveness that you have in your heart. I'm talking
about the forgiveness of God in your heart. Even as God, for Christ's sake,
hath forgiven you. That's the standard. Not, well,
I ought to be more forgiving. That's true. But that's not ever
going to cut the mustard, is it? And you know it. It's if God, for Christ's sake,
hath forgiven us and we understand that, even a little bit, now it's possible. It's possible. I can do all things through Christ. And you and I haven't seen contention
or offense. We've never seen a strong city
until we've seen and have some understanding of the fortress
of God's justice that barred us from access to God and favor
with God. There's no strong city like that.
But those walls were brought down by the power of the precious
blood of God's son. Colossians 1 14 in whom we have
redemption through his blood even the forgiveness of sins
And because there is redemption Because there is forgiveness
Because there is the precious blood of Christ there is reconciliation
With God And that's the key to victory
and that's what this is about it's about When in a victory,
you see the word won in our text. Only the blood could reconcile
us to God. And I'll tell you this too, if
there's gonna be reconciliation in your heart, ever, it's gonna be by that same precious
blood. It's not a flower that grows
in the garden of our heart naturally That's the fruit of the spirit Even as God for Christ's sake
hath forgiven you that's how it happens That's how it happens
Now whether you're right or wrong in the matter of the offense
itself. I you're not justified in being
offended. And we get confused about that. Well, you know, yeah,
I'm a little bit ticked off, but for good reason, no? No, not according to God. You may be completely right in
the matter itself, but you're wrong to be offended by it. And it's self-destructive, isn't
it? Do we know that? It's self-destructive. If we're
always offended about something, if it's always something. I wonder, really, if y'all are
like me in this, I suspect you are, but probably not quite as
bad. When can we ever just rejoice and be happy and be glad and just enjoy the favor of God without
ever, without looking at it, without finding, without manufacturing
even problems and issues and discouragement. It's just not
our nature, is it? There's never just, this is it. This is it. I'm completely happy. I'm completely satisfied. Can
you ever do that? Are you like me? I'll make something
up to worry about. I literally will do that. I'll
make it up. And it reminds me of when I was
a kid, you know, we'd be in school and The weekend would come and
we're like, we bust out the doors like there's no tomorrow. And
don't look back for about 10 minutes before we start thinking,
Monday's coming, Monday's coming. And then even in the summer,
how many days could you really enjoy before you started thinking,
man, we gotta go back to school in a couple of weeks or a couple
of months? It just ruins it, doesn't it? Because we just can't be satisfied, can
we? It's always something. But even when we're dissatisfied
for what we think is a good reason, and we're maybe dissatisfied
with one another or offended by something, it's never right. It's never right. There's never
a good reason for that. And whether you're known for
being easily offended, or often offensive, or even if it's rare
for you to be either, at least outwardly, it's never right. And it's always destructive.
It's destructive, it's self-destructive, and it's destructive to others,
and sinful. And I don't wanna wait to be
80 before I get some understanding of that. I wanna get that now,
don't you? I wanna get that. I wanna understand
that life in Christ should exclude that. It should exclude always
being offended about something. When do we get offended enough
to where it just rolls off of our back? Maybe we're a little
bit closer to that. When are we going to find out
that people are offensive? This world is offensive. People's
personalities are offensive to a great degree. When are we going
to learn that even those that we love, they're going to offend
us sooner or later, aren't they? Maybe especially those that we
love because we don't even give strangers a chance to offend
us, really. for the most part. Remember this little verse. I
want you to turn to one verse with me in Proverbs 13, 10. Proverbs
13, 10. Only my pride cometh contention. That word
only means only. Only by pride. I know you're thinking, well,
I know, yeah, I know that. But knowing it in the moment,
that's the challenge. You know it right now. But when somebody gets your back
up and you hear something that just
makes your blood boil, do you know it then? It's kind of like
with anniversaries. I remembered it yesterday. It's
our anniversary tomorrow, but then tomorrow comes and I'm like,
I completely forgot about it. I remembered it yesterday. So
that counts, doesn't it? No, that don't count, does it?
That don't count. When your wife has to come, you
know, like after lunch to you and say happy anniversary, you
know, and she says it like that, happy anniversary, then it's
too late then, right? It's too late. Let's remember this when it counts. Only by pride cometh contention. What an interesting contrast
to that. You know in these proverbs it's
this side and then this side of it. It's the premise and then
the resolution of it often. Only by pride cometh contention.
What would be the opposite of that? To be well advised. In other words, to take heed
to what God says. That's wisdom. That will prevent and cure offense
and contention. You don't need a psychiatrist
to tell you what the root problem is. Well, let's hypnotize you and
see if we can figure out what's causing your problems. Let me
save you the time. Let me save you the money. It's
you. You're proud. It's me. I'm proud. I'll tell you that for half price,
whatever they charge, I'll give it to you for half price. You're a snowflake. You think
the world and God owe you. That's why you're offended so
easy. What you're really, what we are
really owed is hell. And when we understand that and
what we really are is nothing. And when we understand that,
it's hard to be offended when you're a nobody. It's hard not to be when you're
somebody. This does not give us license
to be offensive and just have the attitude of, oh, well, they
just need to get over it. Or, you know, well, I've asked
for forgiveness. They need to forgive me. That's
just as prideful, just as destructive, just as evil as being easily
offended. And as with everything, I want
to reiterate in closing, as with everything, the answer is that
you and I need to hear from God. The answer is Christ, and the
way that Christ is imposed upon this problem, this particular
problem that is our nature, is through hearing the gospel. That's
what'll bring us down. The word of God is profitable
for reproof, and that's what we need. We need to be well advised
regarding our nature, in what we're constantly prone to and
be guarded against it and look to Him who's the solution to
it. That comes by hearing the gospel.
The better we know who Christ is and what He did for me, the
less offense and contention there will be with brethren and everybody
else for that matter. And let's be warned about this
now. I've been your pastor, some of you, for 19 plus years now. And I believe you know this as
well as I do, after 19 years and a couple of months, in a very real sense, we're really
just getting to know one another. I'm really just starting to learn
to love y'all. And I mean that, that's the truth.
It's not that you're that hard to love. It just takes me a while. But we can destroy that in a
moment. The bars can go up and they almost
never come down again. God help us to look to Christ
in this as in all things, because the answer, again, it's not for
us to strive to be less offensive or strive to not be offended
so easily. We must do that. But the answer, though, is Christ. Hearing of him, learning of him,
bowing to him, understanding what we are, and by his grace persevering, and by his grace following him,
let this mind be in you, which was also in Christ Jesus, who
thought it not robbery to be equal with God, and yet he humbled
himself and became obedient to death, even the death of the
cross. Let's pray.