God made us different from him,
but he no different is from me. I'll make this prayer for him
be kind, To thee I'll open prayers now kind, In prayer and love
since he is gone, And in confession and peace we shall find. Okay, if I can hear it. Right back to James chapter 3. I've told you many times that
I do not prepare messages with any one single individual in
mind. Never. Well, I have done that
before, and as I've told you also, invariably, that person
will not even show up for the service. They're not there. That's the way it always works.
So, the messages I prepare are applicable to all of us, starting
with me. I know that if I am blessed,
you will be blessed. Whatever I need, you need. Whatever it is, whether I need
convicted, or comforted, whatever, you need it too. I'm the same
as you. The subject in the title is taming the tongue. Do you need this? I need this. Okay. Who does this not apply
to? Very, very few people that would
not need this. How important is it? How important
is it? Look at verse 5 in James 3. He
says, The tongue is a little member and boasteth a great thing,
but behold, how great a matter a little fire can deliver. Verse 6. The tongue is a fire
in the world of Nicodemus. Verse 8. And the tongue no man
can attain, it is unruly, full of deadly poison. So it needs
to be tamed, does it not? That's how bad it is. It can
set on fire, tamed. The fire of the whole body, the
person said. It's unruly, it's full of poison. God's Word is full of warnings
and instructions concerning the Son of Man. If you read the Proverbs,
just throughout the Proverbs are warnings and instructions. Turn to this Proverbs, Proverbs
21, Proverbs 21. I'm not going to mark Proverbs, I'm going
to come back and read several places. Proverbs 21, look at
this, this is a good springboard. Proverbs 21, verse 23, it says, The way of this statement. Whoso
keepeth his mouth and his tongue, keepeth his soul from troubles. Well, can I read this? I think soul trouble is our biggest
problem. All right, now back to the gospel
you heard of. Now this is the gospel of James.
Back to James. Along with 1 Corinthians 13,
remember we looked at that last Wednesday night, and this is
a good companion message we talked about, love is kind. Along with 1 Corinthians 13,
this is perhaps a text we need to look at more often, right? Verse 1, my brethren, he's writing
to us, writing to all believers, fellow tongue wearers, Her fellow
tongue-wearers who had felt the trouble. James, I'm sure, had
the same trouble. Be not many messengers, she said.
Be not many messengers. That means don't be authoritative
on every subject. Don't be an authority on every
subject. And I said that this begins with me, because preachers
know the worst about this. They know the worst. They know
everything. Don't be that way, because he
says, knowing that we shall receive the greater condemnation. That
is, the more you know, the more you're accountable for. The more
you profess to know, if you don't do what you know, then you're
guilty more in counting than guilty in writing. For a man
to know something's sinned does not mean it's sinned. So we shall
receive the greater condemnation, he said. And all of us are guilty
of talking about things we don't really understand. All right. Everyone, I believe, guilty. Guilty as charged. Verse two.
In many things we offend all. All of us. offend someone, probably
everyone, at some time. At some time we're going to offend
everyone by something we do, something about us. We're different,
aren't we? We're all saying that we're different.
Our personalities, you know, at the time, we flashed. We all
had character flaws. Yeah, we did. We all had personal
habits that keep in front of people's minds. So he said that
many things we offend all, right? Many things. I could give you
a huge list about yourself, and you could too. Scripture does
tell us, confess your faults one way or another, doesn't it?
We need to confess our faults, not sins, not specific things
we do, but our faults. Confess them and say, I'm sorry,
I'm not more kind, I'm sorry I'm treating you unkind, I'm
sorry I'm not more understanding, I'm sorry I'm not more compassionate,
I'm sorry I talk to you like this, I'm sorry, just keep going.
No, don't confess your sins, confess those of practice. Alright? Confessing your sins, your rottenness,
your meanness, is to please other people's sins. It doesn't help
if he defeats them. They take a little ammunition
from back in the city. You understand what I'm saying?
Confess your faults. But in many things, he said,
in many ways we all offend. But, verse 2, if any man offend
not in word, if someone can be inoffensive in your speech, in
your word, then, now there's a tool of oppression. That person
is a perfect man, a mature man, and he's able also, listen to
this, this is amazing, he's able to write on his body. I want that, don't
you? He talks about the tongue. controlling, or in a minute he's
going to tell us how he affects the whole body. And the man or the woman who
can control the taint of the tongue can subdue the rest. Boy, I'm interested. Aren't you? All right, so he
says the one who doesn't offend in word is truly a mature, a
complete man or Christ-like. To grow in grace, listen to this,
to grow in grace and knowledge is to grow in humility. This
is what God's Word does to us. It humbles us. Humble yourself. And oh, how much the Scripture
talks about humble yourself. Humble yourself. This is what
the Word of God... How do you do that? By being
under the sound of the Word. The Word is what humbly breaks
your heart and convinces of sin and guilt and softens your heart
towards others. And to grow in humility is to
grow quieter. You know what? The more humble
a person is, the less they'll say. You know what? That's certain.
And shouldn't we speak less the older we get? I'll give you a couple of reasons
why. That we should speak less the older we get. Surely we ought
to learn. We're so slow to learn. Surely
we ought to learn that we get in trouble more often with them
than any man. But this is the chief cause of
our trouble, our trouble. And it causes more trouble. Does
it not? I wish I had said that. It causes more trouble. So number
one, surely, the older we get, the more we ought to learn that
this causes us and other people more trouble than anything. And number two, we ought to learn,
the older we get, that nobody's listening. We ought to consider
this. Nobody's listening to us anyway. You know what? They're not. All
right. We're all proud, and as someone
said, most people are just waiting for their turn to speak. We're
not listening to you. We don't have much to say anyway
if it's outside this, you know. We don't have any wisdom to impart
if it's not in here. Right? If it's anything outside
this, what is it? So the older we get, the more
we ought to learn that this is our chief source of trouble,
and number two, why use it? Save it. Nobody's listening anyway. Is that true? All right. And listen to this. I thought
about this. The wisdom of God in the written
Word and the spoken Word. The wisdom of God in the written
Word and the spoken Word is that things are better remembered,
things are more clearly comprehended when read and heard. I'm telling you from the Spirit.
This is why I want you to turn and look at the Scriptures with
me when we turn there. If you just hear me say them,
you won't hear it. You won't learn it. It's a silly
word, word, word, word. But if you look at it with your
eye and your mind looks at it, besides, the Lord blesses us.
Now this is just It's not going to be a key to the subject, but
this is a little offshoot of that. God's wisdom in writing
a book for us to look at, as well as a man to stand up and
expound on, this is how we really learn. This is how we really
comprehend. You know? Also, if you want to
remember anything, a good way to do it is to write it down
and say it out loud. You know that? You'll remember.
So the wisdom of God in writing this book for us to look at,
and a man stands up and we look at it together, read it together,
and then he's astounded. Then we really understand. All right, but James says now
in our text, one who has control of the tongue can control his
whole body. Well, I'm not going to tell us
that in a minute. I sure want to know. Stay tuned.
That's to keep you interested. Verse 3, behold, we put bits
in the mouths of, in horses' mouths, that they may obey us,
and we turn about their whole body. A huge animal that could
kill a man, easily kill a man, one little thing, and keep it
in check. Verse 4, behold also the ships,
which though they be so great, so large, are driven at fierce
winds, that is, the old sailing ships. Boy, James would have
seen one of these aircraft carriers. They're destroyers. Yes, he says, they are turning
about with a very small helm, a rudder, whithersoever the governor
listens. Same with the huge aircraft carriers,
with those old sailing ships, one little wheel. Hands up there
at the helm. Turning one little wheel and
there's a little rudder down there. Because that ship is huge. It turned that whole shit up.
Verse 5. Even so, the tongue is a little
thing. Just a little thing. One of the smallest members.
And boasteth great things. You know, you've heard the old
saying, if he was worthy, he was happy. Or saying, says he
is. Thanks to you that, man, he'd
be worthy. If folks, if we could do half
of what we've said, we'd really be superhuman. Young people are
especially guilty. They're a plans, and we won't
carry out a portion of it. But he says, Tom boasted great
things. Behold, how great a matter the
little fire can behold." Whatever the Scripture writes, behold.
He's saying, stop and consider this. Stop and think about it. Behold this. Consider this. How
great a matter. A little fire, just a little
fire came up. All those hundreds of thousands
of acres, millions of acres that were destroyed recently in fires
that went, a very small, a one match. It says verse six, so he says,
the tongue is fire. And the tongue is fire, just
a little match. A world of iniquity. One word that can start a world
war. And it has. You know that? You'll
read back from history. Most wars were fought when two
leaders of nations didn't like each other and began hurling
insults. And they sent hundreds of thousands
of people to their death. to intend their own personal
honor, or opinion, or whatever. Just words, right? Words. That old sage sits and talks
and breaks my bones with words that never hurt me. Fully on
that. That's not southern. Bones will win. The scripture
in Proverbs says a brother that's attended, though, is harder to
win back than to sit. Someone who's been departed to
be reconciled, to conquer a sin. That's how difficult it is. Well, here's what he says about
defiling the whole body. Verse 6, "'Tongue among our members,'
a little fire, a word over Nicodemus, defiled the whole body." Now,
this is why he said he controlled the tongue, controlled the whole
body. "'Because I hate the whole world.' Just a hateful word will
stir up where we don't. It sets on fire the course of
nature. It's set on fire in hell. In
other words, it brings out the hell in us. When we open this
mouth and start unleashing on someone, it brings out the hell
in us. It sets on fire the course of
nature. The old man starts You know,
that's how, you're seeing pop-off valve, you mean. Pop-off valve,
when a boiler builds up so much steam, you better have a pop-off
valve on it or it'll explode. Well, that's a pop-off valve. But, we need to, you know, we
need to change it. And if we use it, one hateful
word will start a strike in us. And you know how it is. You give
vent to anger and start with words. Words are the vent of
anger. And they become like steam, like
a leak, a leaky faucet. And it will start up in us, strike,
anger. It will bring out the wrath in
us. A sensual word. Off-color, joke or whatever it
is, we stir up those things in us. A critical work, critical
work, like stirs up pride in us, self-righteousness, a haughty
spirit, does it not? Critical work. So, not only do
we cause trouble with others, but it serves us well. The course
of nature sets it on fire. The course of nature brings out
the hell in us. Poison comes out. So, verse 7
and 8, he says, Every kind of beast and of birds and of serpents
and of things in the sea is tamed. Everything is tamed. It has to be tamed with mankind.
Men can tame any kind, any creature. If you name something that man
hasn't captured and tried to domesticate, at least I'm having
snakes, these big cobras, you know, elephants, lions. There's not
anything that man burns, man is tame. But there's one thing
he cannot tame. Look at verse eight, the tongue
can no man tame. And it's unruly evil. It's full
of deadly poison. It's the worst thing. The most
deadly thing. The worst of the Satan. Get over
him, Satan. Why can't man attain it, son?
Why can't we attain it? And the one who says they have, he just messed up. He just lied. The tongue of this life, the
lying tongue. I like old brother John Chapman,
the preacher on 1 John where it says, any man that says he
hath no sin is a liar. He said, I met a friend of mine
that I hadn't seen in years. He got religion, and he was one
of these kind of charismatic. And he was just going on and
on. He said about how he quit sinning. He quits sinning. He does not sin anymore. John
said, he just did, because I know him. I know him. John knows him
all his life. So if we say, well, I've I can
tame my son. You haven't. We haven't. Why
is it that man can't tame his son? Well, that's the answer.
Man cannot. With man, it's impossible. Our Lord said that with man,
it's impossible. Our Lord said, without me, without
me, you can't do. Can't keep this door shut without
the grace of God. But now, our Lord added this, He said,
with man it's impossible, but with God, all things are possible. With
God, all things are possible. The scripture says, He is able
to subdue all things. Only God is able to do some good
this time. And I know there have been some
in our midst. That lady's blessed husband was
a man who, in a few words, Lord gave him a grace of a tiny tongue.
It's so few, so few. That's the only one who can,
right? Who must. Now we need to know
why he tells us. Pray without ceasing. Pray without
ceasing. Because without Him, we can do
nothing. We can't do the least thing. We can't shut our mouths. All right, let me give you some
help. Let me give you some help containing the tongue. James
1. Look at James chapter 1. James chapter 1. Here's some
help. It's very brief, though. It's going to be a short message. Try to practice what I've written. I know for a fact you don't hear
half of what I say, unless it's worth hearing. James 1, 19, he says, now here's
the first one, help me. Wherefore, my beloved brethren,
let every man be swift to hear and slow to speak. Now this will
follow, slowly back. Swift to here, here's the first
step, containing the tongue, being a better hearer. Swift
to here. Turn with me, and I'm going to
have you turn about four or five pages, okay, and that's it. We'll
leave about 30 minutes. First Thessalonians, Chapter
4. First Thessalonians, Chapter 4. First Thessalonians 4, listen
to this, First Thessalonians 4, now he says be swift to hearing,
hearing, being a good hearer is the first thing. How can you
become a good hearer? There's something wrong with that. These two things cannot
work simultaneously. Have you ever watched CNN or
Fox News where there'd be two opposing people on there giving
their opinions? You're not a part of here anyway.
And our generation speaks so fast. Teenagers, everybody speaks
because they've got so much to say. Everybody wants to get said.
They don't care if you're talking at all. You know, nobody's listening. Everybody's talking. The only
way we can learn is being a good hearer. Being a good hearer. And this is the only way we can
change the tongue. Be a good hearer. 1 Thessalonians 4 verse
11 says this, that you study to be quiet. My teacher said I'm going to
study an hour a day. Now, I don't want to. I have
a lot of things to do. And I don't want to. But I'm
going to have to make it so. I'm going to have to force myself.
I want to learn the language. So I'm going to have to do it. He says here's something to say.
An hour a day. Be quiet. It's hard to do it. We talk out of nerves
many times. Old brother Jack Shanks. I love
that man. He's a man of few words. When
you've heard him preach, you hear it. Why? Because he talks
so clearly. And you hear it everywhere. And all of that takes an accent.
When he said this, he said this, you'll never forget it. He said,
Take every opportunity to shut up. You catch how profound that is? He got that from 1 Thessalonians
4. He said, study to be quiet. Take every opportunity, whenever
the opportunity arises. Proverbs 1. Go back to Proverbs
1. Proverbs chapter 1. I'm going to look through the
Proverbs, because this is all the way through. Solomon, you
know, the Lord gave him more wisdom than any other man, I
guarantee. Though Solomon had much to say,
and most of it was here, yet I guarantee. Proverbs 1 verse 5 says a wise
man will hear, a wise woman will hear, be a good hearer, and will
increase learning. It's the only way. Chapter 8, Proverbs 8. Our Lord who is wisdom, think
about Him. If you think about me, every
word he uttered was eternally significant. Yes, and he faced so many people,
and they, everybody was talking. Pharisees heard him question,
and everybody was talking, talking, talking, talking, talking. And
he didn't answer everybody. There's a proverb that says,
answer not a fool according to his father. That's the first. It says, answer not a fool according
to his father. In other words, it's best to
just let a fool go on talking. And just be quiet. Or you can
become like him. And then the next verse says,
answer a fool according to his father. In other words, the first thing
to do is just let the person have their say. Then there's
a time when it needs to be addressed, and only with wise words. Proverbs 8, but our Lord, oh
my, who is wisdom. Everything he said was worth
saying. Verse 33, he says, now hear instruction,
hear it and be wise, refuse it not. Blessed is the man that
heareth. So, this is the first thing.
Turn to Proverbs 10. How often have you spoken without thinking? How often do we speak of tolerating? How often? And later on, you
think of something that you really should have said and wish you
hadn't said all that you did say. Whereas if we were to stop and
listen and consider and discern and ponder and wait, Then we
really had something worth saying. He said, then it would be proper. Guilty. Chapter 10, verse 19,
he says, In the multitude of words there wanteth not sin.
And folks, I hope you have an opinion on me. I have to stand
up here 3 or 4 times a week and open my
mouth. And in the course of, on Sunday
morning, in about two hours time of talking, I'm going to say
something wrong. Now, if you've got your mouth
open long enough, you are going to get your foot in it. Guaranteed
that. So you have pity upon that. You
do the same if you can. And nerves, I've told you. Nervousness
causes us to talk. Verse, he says, verse 19, a multitude
of words, a multitude of words, a multitude of words, a multitude of words, a multitude of words, a multitude
of words, a multitude of words, a multitude of words, a multitude of words, a multitude of words,
a multitude of words, a multitude of words, a multitude of words, a multitude of words, a multitude of words,
a multitude of words, a multitude of words, a multitude of words, a multitude of words, a multitude of words,
a multitude of words, a multitude of words, a multitude of words, a multitude of words, a multitude of words,
a multitude of words, a multitude of words, a multitude of words, a multitude of words, a multitude of words,
a multitude of words, a multitude of words, a multitude of words, a multitude of words, a multitude of words,
a multitude of words, a multitude of words, a multitude of words, a multitude of words, a multitude of words,
a multitude of words, a multitude of words, a multitude of words, Look at this. I like this. Proverbs
17 says this. He that refraineth his lips is
wise. Proverbs 17. Turn it. Turn it. Verse 28. Proverbs 17 verse 28
says, Even a monk, when he holds his peace, is counted wise. He that shuts his lips, for that
is a man who doesn't talk much, Everybody thinks he's a man of
no shame. Well, he is, really. He's smart,
because if he knows he doesn't know, he'd better not say it
and prove he doesn't know. Or as someone said, it's better
to be thoughtful. It's better to be quiet and to
be thought a fool than to open your mouth and remove all that. I think that came from this,
and I'm sure it did. It's better to be thought a fool
than to be quiet, than to open your mouth and remove all that.
I will never debate anybody. I'm not good at that. Give me a full pit and time to
study my subject. But off the cuff, chapter 29,
quickly, in Proverbs 29, very quickly. So being a good hearer, Proverbs
29, verse 11, look at this. Proverbs 29, 11. A fool uttered all his mind,
but a wise man keepeth it in till afternoon. A fool don't
tell you everything he knows, and it'll take him about 20 minutes. Right? We just read that in Proverbs
15, didn't we, John? Who is known by a multitude of
words. So, it's one help in taming the tongue is being swift to
hear. Being a good hearer. All right? Psalm 120. Psalm 120. Here's the next help,
and these go hand in hand. How are we going to be a good
hearer? How are we going to tame the tongue? By being a good hearer. How are we going to be a good
hearer? Where does the hear and hear
come from? Who made the hear and hear? People have ears, but they don't
necessarily hear. But the hear and hear, truly
hear and hear, is out of the wall at this time. Proverbs 120, as I said, most
of the psalms are contained prayer. And David said this, this is
the prayer, that's the next son, that's the next head, being a
good hearer, and that's through prayer. Prayer is the key. Without
me you can do nothing. We ask the Lord for this. Great. Verse 1, David said, In my distress
I cried unto the Lord, and he heard me. Deliver my soul, O
Lord, from lying lips, and from a deceitful tongue. Who's he
talking to? Himself. Himself. So he's talking to you,
every life. Believers aren't liars. That's
not their will. They're truthful. You can believe
them. You really can't. But we're flesh
and blood, and there's time to save our skin. And it ain't a
white lie, Mattel, it's just a lie. So David said, deliver
my lips and my soul, O Lord, from lying lips and from deceitful
tongue. Oh, verse 3, what shall be given
unto thee? What shall be done unto thee,
you false tongue, sharp arrows of the mighty? What sharp arrows?
I'm shooting them tonight. The hope of the Holy Spirit is
there. The arrows of the Almighty that
ought to hit the heart, starting with me, and close the mouth. Psalm 141, this is the last verse. Psalm 141, another prayer that
David gives. Psalm 141, another prayer. This is the key. This is the
help the Lord gives us. A call on him, a day of trouble. A time of trouble. Lord, verse
one, I cry unto thee, make haste unto me. Give ear unto my voice
when I cry unto thee. Let my prayer be set forth before
thee as incense, as a lifting up of my hands, and prayer as
an evening sacrifice. Set and watch the world before
my mouth. Keep the poor. Lord, I can't do it. I can't
do it. I can't take this. So where does
he answer? With David, in his prayer. Lord,
help me. Help me. And so James says, so
the tongue is an unruly thing and full of poison, set on fire
at things, causes us all trouble. No man can tame it yet. He said,
any man who lacks wisdom, let him ask. He said, we have not,
because we ask not. Any man who lacks wisdom, let
him ask the God who gives liberally. God loves, delights to grant
wisdom. Grace, He gives more grace. Anyone
who asks for grace, oh, He loves, He delights to give grace. and
wisdom. Anyone asked to be like Christ,
wisdom, discernment, all these devices and that. So, lay masks,
James said, and he upbraideth not. I like that. He upbraideth not. In other words,
he doesn't scold us, as John said, doesn't scold us, doesn't
say, what did you do with the grace they gave you? You're not,
you're not going to, you know, you're going to keep it up. No,
he doesn't do that. He gives it. He gives it. So, and then James said, well,
who's a wise man to do with knowledge? Let him show. have a good conversation, his
words, who he is, and show it by this. This is a good place
to start. You need that? I need that. All
right, Stanley. My father, we need help in every
way. We need your leadership, your
Holy Spirit, to constrain us to do that which is right and
restrain us from doing that which is evil, especially in these
times. Lord, for your glory, our good,
the edification, the profit of others, Lord, help us to give
us grace to do these things. Name our time. Set a watch, O
Lord, over our lips. Close the doors of our mouth
until something is worth saying. Give us wisdom from above, we
pray. We ask these things in Christ's
name. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. you you Thank you very much. I don't know. So, I'm going to show you a little
bit of what's going on here. So, I'm going to show you a little
bit of what's going on here.