Proverbs 22, verse 6 is our text. Upon which all of this is built. Train up a child in the way he
should go. The way, if you'll notice in
the margin, his way. Not the child's natural way,
but God's way. Are you looking at it? Train
up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will
not depart from it. I hope you realize how difficult
this is for me to do. Very broad subject, isn't it?
Very difficult, and I do not normally, as you
know, I do not normally teach or speak. On subjects that I
am an expository. Preacher teacher. But we have
this subject before us of biblical child discipline while. Contemplating
this study and telling you long before. We got to it. I did not receive any encouragement
from anybody to do this. And I knew I wouldn't. I knew
particularly young parents would not ask me, per se, to do this. In fact, one said to me they
were afraid of what was going to be said. Now, I understand
that. I really do. We've said so many
times that we often avoid what we know to be true. And because
it requires something of us, doesn't it? Can't be indifferent
to the truth, and the truth never hurts. Never hurt. And as with any truth,
excuse me, as with any truth from God's word, it's convicting
first. We're going to clearly see from
God's word our shortcomings as parents. and the glaring faults
and rebellion of our children. The truth requires a diligent
hearer and a doer. If we hear the word, Scripture
says, and don't do it, we deceive ourselves. And it puts, when
we hear the truth, then we're responsible for it. It puts responsibility
on us. But don't look so downcast. My,
my, this is all good. Everybody's already going, oh,
no. This is the whole point. This is good. First thing we're
going to see, the first lesson we need to learn is, what does
God say about all this? But as I said, truth is always
good, never hurtful, and the reason perhaps we may not want
to hear it is because it's going to require some hard work on
our part. Parenting is hard work. Actually,
it requires as much or more discipline for us than our children. I want you to think about this,
how important this subject is. Our responsibilities as parents
are great, very great. Having a child is not a right,
it's a privilege, and not to be taken lightly. The whole world
is having children, and they don't deserve to have them. And having a child is a privilege,
a God-given gift and a privilege, the guidance, the care of little
ones, little human beings that are totally dependent upon us,
is a serious matter, isn't it? The molding and the shaping of
a young human being—and that's what we're doing as parents—is
a serious and a difficult, yea, impossible thing, but for the
grace of God and the wisdom of God. Yet God has promised. We just
read it. God has promised his grace. God
has given us good instruction. Good instruction. We are going
to see how very, very much scripture tells us on this subject. Far
from being silent, it is very plain and very much said. And we need wisdom, the wisdom
of Solomon. the same wisdom that comes only
from above. Whatever we say, here is the
difficulty of parenting, and here is a cardinal rule. Is that a good thing to say,
cardinal rule? Where did that come from? I hope that is not
a Catholic saying. Anyway, here is a general rule
that we are going to keep seeing that whatever we say or do, we
must be prepared to carry it through. We must be prepared to carry it
through. So it's a serious thing, what we say, what we do, and
so forth. We're going to look at this a
great deal, how fathers and mothers must work together, absolutely
must work together, reinforce one another, not work against
one another. and much more on that later. Now where do we begin such a
difficult subject as this? Where do we begin? Well, we begin
where all truth begins. We begin with God. We just read
a portion of God's Word, but the thing I want us to see throughout
this whole first lesson is we need to have This foundation
laid, we need to have it settled in our minds and our hearts.
This scripture, let God be true. And every man a liar on every
subject. We're going to have to first
reject modern worldly thought on child raising as a lot of
it. A lot of it. Modern, worldly
opinions on this subject are not working. Even modern experts, and I'm
not going to quote any of them during this, they're not worth
quoting, but modern experts even admit now it's not working. All this time-out stuff and rewarding
bad behavior, it's not working. And one of
the signs of the very last day, the perilous time, the last of
the very last day, down in 2 Timothy 3, verse 2, I believe it is,
4, they're disobedient to children, right along disobedient to parents. right along with lovers of self,
covetous, boasters, proud, disobedient to parents. That's one of the signs of the
time. Let it not be said of our children. So let God be true
on this subject and every other, and every man a liar. Every man
a liar. So, it says there in Proverbs
22, his way, all right? Go back to Proverbs 1. Proverbs
1, we need to look at what God's word says to us as parents. Our responsibility as parents.
And as we say it, and we're going to look at scripture after scripture
after scripture throughout this study, we need to get back to
the book. We need to get back to the book.
His way. His way. What God says. And he
says very much. And something we're going to
see is that we're going to look to our Heavenly Father for wisdom,
and we're going to look at Him as our supreme example. You see,
He's the Father, and we're His children. And we're to raise
our children just like He raises His. Right? He's the supreme
example. How he raises his children is
how we raise ours. I noticed this actually for the
first time in the book of Proverbs. It begins this way, verse one,
Proverbs of Solomon, the son of David, king of Israel. Proverbs,
Solomon, the son of David. God begins this book full of
wisdom by saying this is the son of a wise and godly father. who learned from his father,
a son who is also a king. Does that sound familiar? A son and a king. This is his Word to us. This
is Christ. This is the Word of the Son of
God, who is the Word. As we said, we are going to look
at scripture after scripture, and what we need to ask ourselves
is, are we going to hear this? Are we going to heed this? Are
we going to do what God says? This is not a suggestion. What God says is not a suggestion.
It's not advice. God doesn't give advice, but
it's command. Are we going to trust the Lord
and submit ourselves and our children to his way, his word
and his way? Or are we going to lean to our
own understanding? Or are we just going to hope
that our kids turn out all right? A lot of people do that, you
know, I just hope they turn out all right. So he says in verse one, this
is the word of the son, the king. Word of the son who is king,
verses two through four. So know wisdom. This thing of
parenting is not something we are immediately given. We have
to learn to be parents, as well as children have to learn. Right? We have to learn to be parents.
Where do we learn? My dear old grandmother, this
is the way she used to do things. Would you forget her? Unless
she was a godly woman. Unless he acted according to
biblical principle, forget her. She's a fallible, finite, ignorant
woman. And a wives tale. Forget that. OK. To know wisdom, where does
it come from? Where does this kind of wisdom
come from? Read on. And instruction to perceive the
words of understanding. To receive the instruction of
wisdom. That's Christ. Justice and judgment. Equity. to give subtlety to the
simple. I need some subtlety, don't you?
You're going to need a lot of it when you deal with children,
aren't you? Most of it requires a straightforward,
plain dealing. Some of it is going to require
a lot of subtlety. Discretion, to give knowledge and discretion.
My, my, we're going to run into some things. that we've never dealt with before,
decisions we have to make. God doesn't leave us in the dark,
and although there are different things we will be faced with,
there are foundational principles which we can apply to everything.
This is what I'm trying to establish in our hearts and minds. God
has put down foundational principles that
can be applied to everything. and certainly give us wisdom.
Look at verse five. A wise man will hear. You want
to be wise yourself, you want to be a wise parent, then listen. Listen. And we'll increase learning. Verse six, or verse seven. The fear of the Lord is the beginning
of knowledge. We're going to look at three
words throughout this study. The first word is fear. Should
a child fear their parent? Should we fear our Heavenly Father?
This is the beginning of knowledge. That's something to do with respect.
That this is the parent. This is my authority. Not first, my good buddy, my
friend. Is God our friend? Absolutely. But not first. Here, we're going
to learn, we're going to look at words like this. Trust. Trust. Most of what we tell our children,
they're just going to have to trust us. And this is why we
said in the beginning that it's going to have to be whatever
we say, whether warning, we have to Fulfill it, or whether promise,
it's going to have to be fulfilled. Trust deals trouble. And the
third word is love. These three things. We're going to see throughout
this time. Fear of the Lord, he says, is the beginning of
knowledge. Fear of the Lord. Fools despise it. Fear is profound, all respect,
reverence. See that you're reverent then. And these are some of the first
principles we're going to instill in our children. Chapter 2. Chapter
2. Now, if you'll notice how God's
Word is written, it's written to the sons of God as a parent,
isn't it, to children, as a parent to children. Verse 2, or verse
1 of chapter 2. You see that my son John wrote
little children. I write unto you that you can
not. In other words, don't do that. Little children, my son, if thou
wilt verse one receive my word. And a man can receive nothing
except it be given him. Ask the Lord, give me a receptive
heart, and hide my commandments with thee. David wrote, Hide
thy word in my heart, that I might not sin against thee. Lord, instill
this in me first as a parent, that I might in turn instill
this in my children. So this is where it begins. It
begins with us learning from God. And if I sound like I don't
mean to sound like I'm an authority, but if any man speak, let him
speak as the oracles of God. I'm speaking on the authority
of this work. I'm not a novice at parenting. Whether I did a
good job or not, you be the judge, OK? But I'm speaking from God's
Word. God's Word. We need wisdom from
above, and God's the only one who has it. Verse 6, The Lord
giveth wisdom. Where does it come from? The
Lord giveth wisdom. Where out of his mouth. There is no. And I've often brought
this to your attention. And I'm going to take all the
time I want this morning, because we started five, ten minutes
late. Plus, our children are not where the young people are
not in the classes down there and the big subject. Anything we hear in the world
that sounds wise and sounds good and sounds profound or whatever,
I guarantee you, it's a paraphrase that came in some way from Scripture. That's right. So it all comes
from God. Out of his mouth cometh knowledge
and understanding. Verse 7, he lays it up. Sound
wisdom for the righteous. God's people are going to hear
this. I'm confident somebody's going to hear this. I'm confident
some young parents, even grandparents, we grandparents need to hear
this. The older women are going to need to teach the younger
women these things. If they haven't already, they
need to start now. And the righteous, that's who
this is for. This is for God's people who
hear this. And it says He's a buckler to them that walk upright. He's
a defense. He's a strength. He's an encouragement. He'll back you up on this. He'll
prove His Word through you and to you and for you. Yes, He will. A buckler. Verse, we'll look at chapter
3. Chapter three, verse five, Trust
in the Lord with all thine heart, lean not unto thine own understanding. As we say, we're not, we just
don't have this, it's too bad that, you know,
we're not as fruitful in wisdom as we are in giving birth to
children. And some women are very fruitful
in that, but this wisdom is not natural. It's not natural. We
don't know how to parent kids do when they come out. And boy,
Hannah and those who have had the first one are going to say,
it's going to come, and you're going to say, now what? Mom,
right? First thing, mom, dad, help me. I know the older I got the more
I called my parents and even now. As a pastor I've been consulting
my pastor more than ever. I wish he was pastor. I wish
he'd do this for me. Came a time I wish they would
raise my daughter for us. So it comes from above where
he gives it. He gives it, but lean not to thy own understanding.
In all thy ways, verse six, acknowledge him, he'll direct your path. Lord, I need wisdom from above.
I need to know what to do. I don't know what to do. Would
you tell me what to do? Yes, I will. Yes, he will. He shall direct, and look at
verse seven. Be not wise in thine own eyes,
fear the Lord. Fear the Lord. So you see, he
talks about fear and trust, doesn't he? Trust in the Lord. Fear. Fear and trust. Chapter 4, Talbert. Now, this is for adults and young
people that are here. Chapter 4, verse 1. Hear ye,
children, hear. Isn't this our greatest problem?
Isn't that our greatest problem? You adults, don't you wish, don't
you wish that you'd just listen to your parents? You know, I
don't think I'd owe a dime had I listened. And so many things. Here are your children, the instruction
of a father. God our Father, and attend. Don't you wish you could get
your children's attention and keep it? Listen to me. Would you listen
to me? Tell me what's right. I give you, verse 2, good doctrine. This is good, good teaching. Verse 3, I was my father's son. I was my father's son. tender and only beloved in the
sight of my mother, and he taught me also, and said unto me, Let
thine heart retain my word, keep my commandment, not my suggestions,
not my opinions, commandments, and do what? Live. Live. You know that this is addressed
to Christ, and speaking of him and all that, we're on the subject
of parenting. It's the last time I'm going
to say this, OK? Listen to me. It's the last time I'm going
to say this throughout this study. When we're talking about rewards
and obedience and all of this thing, we're not talking about
salvation. Proverbs 22, 6 is not talking about salvation.
You cannot save your children's soul. No. We can't touch their heart. Can't
touch it. Let's talk about instilling biblical
principles, godly principles in them, molding character. And when they're old, these principles
will be instilled in them as children and will not depart
from them, such as a hard work ethic, respect, and all of these
things. We can't say they're so. This
is not talking about rewards for obedience, for salvation.
No. So that's the last time I'm going
to say that, OK? You know that. you know that well. He talks about keep my commandments
and live and even Peter said this who is he Peter said. Who is he that would. Quote exactly. Be able to. Enjoy life and see many good
days. Let him depart from evil. Keep
his tongue from, and so forth and so on. It's a practical sense. It'll go well with you. So look
at verse, let's see, verse four. He taught me, he said, let mine
heart retain my words. Keep my commandments and live.
Get wisdom. Get wisdom. So the first thing
for us as parents is this. Do we? We call ourselves believers,
and I trust that most of you are. I know you now, and I trust
that you are. You give evidence that you are.
Then do we truly believe God's Word is the only way? It's the
only way. It's the right way. That man's
way is the wrong way. There's a way that seems right
unto man. But the end is what? God's Word
says destruction. And do we see how that in Isaiah
it says this in chapter fifty-nine. I think of this all the time
in reference to our day. Judgment's backwards. Judgment
is turned way backward. Justice, that is what is right,
it stands afar off. Truth is fallen in the street.
Equity cannot enter. The truth, not only the gospel,
is so foreign. The truth of anything that God
says is so foreign. That when you tell it, when you,
when you quote it, it's a strange doctrine, barbaric, old fashioned. Nobody believes like that anymore.
Nobody thanks their children anymore. It's so backward now. And so is the roles. Children
run the house now. Do you see that, how it's all
so backward, so far up? We're going to have to stand,
as Jeremiah said, stand ye in the way, and see and ask for
the old paths wherein is the good way, and you will find rest
for your soul and wisdom from above. By God's
grace, walk therein. I thought about old Abraham. The Lord said about Abraham,
Boy, don't you wish this was said about you. Listen to this.
Listen to what God said about Abraham. Talk about a man. Talk
about a man. God said, God said, Shall I hide
this thing from Abraham, the thing which I do? He shall surely
become a great and mighty nation. Listen to this. God said, I know
him that he will command his children. and his household after
him, and they shall keep the way of the Lord, to do justice
and judgment, that the Lord may bring upon Abraham what he has
promised. I know him. He is going to command his children and his household, and they are
going to keep his way. Don't you wish it were said that
of you. It is not too late. It is never too late. First day
of the rest of our lives, that old saying is pretty good. To that, begin right now. It's
never too late, as long as children are under our roof. Some of us,
you know, the Lord saved us later in life. Our children are older.
If they're under our roof, it's not too late. Not too late. God's Word. Go to Deuteronomy
4. Deuteronomy chapter 4. As I say it, all I'm going to
do this first lesson is just read God's Word to you so that
it will be established in our hearts and minds. This is not
up for debate. This is not a matter of opinion.
This is what God says about the subject. God's Word is very plain
with promise of reward to the obedient. Chapter 4, verses 5
and 6. He says, Behold, I have taught
you statutes and judgments, as the Lord my God commanded me,
that you should do in the land whither you go to possess it.
Keep therefore and do them. Retain it, remember it, do it.
This is your wisdom and your understanding in the sight of
the nation. And they will say, Surely this great nation is wise
and understanding people. That son or that daughter, they've
been raised well, haven't they? Who did you listen to? Who did
you talk to when you were raising your children? My father. My heavenly father. That's it. See that? Verse 9, look at verse 9. He
says, Take heed to thyself, keep thy soul diligent. Lest thou
forget the things which thine eyes have seen." We've learned
some things, haven't we? We've been taught some things,
haven't we? We need to teach it. Verse 9, "...and teach them
thy sons, and thy sons' sons." That means grandparents, grandchildren. Teach them chapter six over chapter
six. He says this over and over and
over throughout Deuteronomy. Teach them through your children
versus one and following. These are the commandments, statutes,
judgments. which the Lord your God commanded
to teach you, that you might do them in the land, that thou
mightest fear the Lord, to keep his statutes and his commandment,
which I command thee, thou thy son, thy son's son, all the days
of thy life, that thy days may be prolonged." Hear them, verse 3. Observe to
do. Hear, O Israel, the Lord, verse
4, our God is one Lord. Verse 6, These words which I
command thee shall be in thine heart, thou shalt teach them
diligently unto thy children. Talk of them when you sit in
thine house, when thou walkest by the way, when thou liest down.
I'm glad many of our young people are in here this morning, because
what you're hearing is not what the pastor thinks or what the
preacher says, and so don't get mad at me. This is what God said, teach
our children, teach them. Now here's to the young people,
every one of you young people look at this, chapter 5, verse
16. Deuteronomy 5, verse 16, honor
thy father and thy mother as the Lord thy God hath commanded
thee, that thy days may be prolonged, that it may go well with thee.
It will go well with you in the land. There's just a plain old down-to-earth
principle. If you're respectful, polite,
considerate, it'll go well with you. You'll be the first to get
the job when you're older. These impudent, rebellious, in-your-face
people, it's not going to go well with
them. quoted this over in Ephesians
6. He said, this is the first commandment
with promise. He said, children obey your parent,
for it is right. He said it's right, meaning it's
right by God. Whatever God says, it's right.
It'll be right by us as parents. It'll be right to our children.
It's right, and it's the first commandment with promise, Scripture
says. First commandment was promised that your days may be prolonged,
that it will go well with you. Not of eternal life, but... And young people, let me say
this, and you're going to hear it over and over again. As far
as you're concerned, your parents are always right. And what you'll find out is the
older you get, the more you realize, you know, they were right. There
were things that I thought they were wrong about, and the older
I get, I think they were dead right. Dead right. And in our text, in closing, Proverbs 22, go back there in
closing. As we said before, parenting
is a day-to-day thing. Different things will be faced
with, different things that come up that require wisdom to deal
with. And children are different, males
and females. I've often said, I'm glad I didn't
have a boy. But the Lord would have given
me grace to deal with that, as he has you, who did. Children are different, different
personalities. Sexes are different, different
personalities. But the same basic principles
and truth apply to them all. They're all still, here's a verse
of scripture for you. Foolishness is bound up in the
heart of a child. They're born that way. Wild-ass
is called. They're not good little, sweet
little kind thing. You ought to know that. They're
yours. It says, foolishness is bound up
in the heart of the child. What will get it out of him?
What does God say? Time out. The rod will drive it from him. And there are principles that
apply to everything, in every situation. Foundational truths. And the thing I'm trying to do,
we're trying to do in this first lesson, is establish in our hearts
and mind, if we'll be established, that God's word is the first
and last word on this subject. To be believed, obeyed, acted
upon. That God's word is true, it's
trustworthy. Proving. Prove it. It's right. He said, train up
a child. Train, what does that mean? Teach,
catechize, it means mold, shape. Oh, I don't want to mold my child.
You'd better. A child, here's another scripture,
lest to himself will be a grief to his parents. Oh no, this is
your whole responsibility as a parent, to mold and shape this
young person into a productive human being. And we raise them
in the nurture and admonition of the Lord in the hope, under
the word of God, in hope that God will use the scripture which
is able to make them wise unto salvation. The only wisdom we
can impart by God's grace. is these day-to-day principles.
And that's what this is talking about. Train them up in the way
they should go. And when they're old, you do
not depart from them. And even spiritual truths, I think back, you know, now,
well, my parents told me that. And my parents did this and that
and the other, and it had a profound effect on me spiritually. not only the practical things
I learned, but as we say, it's never too late, never too late. And may it be said of us, as
we read about old Abram, I know him. He'll command his children. and command his children, what
I said. Now, next Sunday, we really begin
in depth. The first thing we're going to
deal with is authority, respect for authority. We're going to
look at what the word no means. You know, surprisingly, a lot of people don't know what
no means. Can you smile? We want to see
respect for authority, the word of authority. What God says,
what does it mean? Barnard used to say, he doesn't
say what you think it means, he says what he says. God's word
is not yay and nay, it's yay and amen, certain. No, we're
going to look at the, you know, Ten Commandments. The majority
of them are no. Arthur. Now, now, now, now, now,
now, now, now, now, now, now, now, now, now, now, now, now,
now, now, now, now, now, now, now, now, now, now, now, now,
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now, now, now, now, now, now, now, now, now, now, now, now, now, now,
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now, now, now, now, now, now, now, now, now, Okay. All right. you All right. All right. and and and Okay. you Okay. Okay. Okay. Thank you very much. you Okay. Okay. Okay. All right. Okay. All right. I. Okay. Thank you. Okay. Uh huh. Okay. I don't know. I don't know. I
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