Husbands, Love your wives

Q: What does the Bible say about husbands loving their wives?

The Bible commands husbands to love their wives and not be bitter against them, as seen in Colossians 3:19 and Ephesians 5. The Scriptures outline a husband's duty to love his wife through direct commands, such as in Colossians 3:19 and Ephesians 5:25, where husbands are instructed to love their wives as Christ loved the church. This love is a profound self-giving, reflecting Christ's relationship with His people. It emphasizes commitment, equality, and sacrifice, demonstrating that a husband is to cherish his wife deeply and relate to her with kindness and humility, avoiding bitterness and resentment. This love should be rooted in the grace that God has shown us in Christ, urging husbands to give selflessly in their marriages.

Q: Why is it important for husbands not to be bitter against their wives?

It is vital for husbands to avoid bitterness toward their wives as it contradicts God's command and harms marital harmony. Bitterness can poison relationships and is a significant impediment to genuine love and intimacy. When husbands harbor resentment, they not only disobey Scripture but also create an environment of strife rather than nurturing. The command to love and not be bitter, as articulated in Colossians 3:19, acknowledges the potential for conflict but emphasizes the need for grace and forgiveness. By adhering to this command, husbands reflect the love of Christ towards their wives, fostering a healthy, God-honoring relationship that mirrors God's love for His people.

Q: How do we know that Christ's love for the Church is true?

Christ's love for the Church is evidenced by His sacrificial death and ongoing commitment to His people. The truth of Christ's love for His Church is established through His sacrificial actions and the New Testament teachings. Ephesians 5:25 states that Christ loved the church and gave Himself for her, clearly showcasing the depth and extent of His love. This love is eternal and transformative, ensuring that believers are presented as holy and blameless before God. Moreover, passages such as John 3:29 illustrate Christ as the bridegroom joyfully acknowledging His relationship with the Church. His continual intercession and provision further affirm His unwavering love and commitment to His people.

Q: Why does God command husbands to love their wives as Christ loved the Church?

God commands this to reflect Christ's relationship with the Church, which serves as a model for marital love. The command for husbands to love their wives as Christ loved the Church, as noted in Ephesians 5:25, provides a divine template for marriage. This relationship illustrates the self-giving, sacrificial nature of love that is central to the gospel. By instructing husbands to emulate Christ's love, God emphasizes that marital love should mirror His love for His people—a love that is unconditional, sacrificial, and committed. It elevates the marriage relationship to a depiction of Christ's unwavering affection towards His Church, reminding husbands of their duty to love, nurture, and serve their wives in all circumstances.

Q: How does God's design for marriage reflect His relationship with His people?

God’s design for marriage symbolizes the profound, covenant relationship between Christ and the Church. The institution of marriage serves as a powerful metaphor for the relationship between God and His people. Scriptures like Isaiah 54:5 describe God as the husband of His people, illustrating a deep covenant relationship filled with love and commitment. Similarly, Ephesians 5:31-32 compares the union of husband and wife to Christ and the Church, indicating that marriage is meant to reflect His love, sacrifice, and faithfulness. Each marital covenant mirrors the steadfast nature of God’s covenant with humanity, where sacrifice, love, and faithfulness are paramount, allowing believers to grasp a deeper understanding of divine love.

Let's look at Colossians 3, verse 19 with me today. After reading Ephesians 5, we're going to Ephesians 5, but I want you to read Colossians 3, 19, because we are going through the book of Colossians, and this is why we've come to this portion of scripture in Ephesians, because it teaches the same thing with more detail than we see in Colossians 3. So in Colossians 3 and verse 19, after having given us the foundation on which our salvation rests, which is God's will and Christ's blood and the work of the Spirit of God, which joins us to Christ, giving us faith and life, We read this, these exhortations in chapter three, and this one in verse 19 is, husbands, love your wives and be not bitter against them. Love your wives and be not bitter against them. Now, as I said last week, the Relationships described in Colossians chapter three, which are given to us, and the admonitions that go with them, whether it be wives to their husbands, husbands toward their wives, or children toward their parents, or servants toward their masters, or masters to their servants, all of these are given to us in a way, but designed by God to be very tangible in our lives.

We have brothers and sisters. We have parents. All of us are children. And we have a basic and intuitive understanding of what those relationships mean. And yet, God has designed each of those relationships in order to teach us tangibly, to demonstrate to us a spiritual reality. And the spiritual realities are Christ's role in each of these and our relationship to Him by God's design, by God's will, by God's grace. And so what we see in these relationships is the spiritual and eternal and heavenly basis for how we live by faith on this earth. Because we do live now by faith. We don't see with physical eyes what is true, but we hear with spiritual ears and with spiritual eyes we see the truth because we have God's word and that word is applied to us by the spirit of God himself.

And this is the grace of God given to us, that he would give us his word, he would reveal to us what we could not know unless he made it known. And then when he does, we're surprised that the lesson is so near as these relationships God has given us in our life. So today, when we look at this verse in verse 19, husbands, love your wives and be not bitter against them, the first thing that strikes us here is that God would have to tell husbands to do this. Why would God have to tell a husband to love his wife and to be not bitter against them?

This seems upside down, doesn't it? It shows something about our natural proclivity to be the opposite of what makes sense in a rational, in a moral way that we would despise. We would have bitterness towards the one we cherish most. And that is an ironic thing.

It's not so ironic, though, as the fact that God tells us the most important commandment of all is that you love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your mind, with all your soul, with all your strength. And yet, who else should we love? if we were right in our thinking, in our heart, in our affections, in our strength, in everything we are, then to love God, who alone is holy and who is all good in every way and everything he does. So it strikes us, therefore, that God would have to tell us to do what should be automatic and should be natural, but we find that because He tells us this, it shows us that there is something about us that is naturally opposed to all that is right, to all that is holy.

And that should humble us right away, shouldn't it? And the other thing is, is that as husbands, Being the stronger of the sexes, if you want to say it that way, physically, we chafe when people tell us to do something. We are naturally disinclined to be submissive. We are more naturally opposed to any authoritarian rule over us.

And so this is something we have to learn. And God is teaching us here that in opposition to our natural tendency, the Lord is instructing us according to his heart. And that's why this is significant, is because what God is revealing here is the way that God thinks. the way that God thinks. And he holds up to us the way that he thinks in the person of his son and in his heart attitude towards his people. And so we want to look at this, husbands love your wives and be not bitter against them. It raises several questions. One is, how is this related to the Lord Jesus Christ? And then why would God tell us this concerning him? And let me answer that one right away because it's important that we see this.

The only way we will ever do anything right by God's standards, the only way we will ever think right or have the right motives or actually, in dependence upon God's grace, do what is right is if he gives this to us and he gives it to us by holding up Christ and him crucified to us. Because scripture is meant to unfold the mysteries of the gospel and the gospel is the message from God, from heaven about his son, about his glory and his redeeming work of a sinful people. And it is this message from God, this truth of heaven, that's brought to us on earth by God's grace, that is the motive of everything that we do that is right. And apart from this, apart from the understanding of Christ and Him crucified, embedded in our hearts by the operation of God, we cannot think right, we cannot have the right motives, we can't do right, we can't say the right things.

So we need to be corrected. We need to have our hearts changed. We need to have our hearts renewed. We need to think the way that the Lord Jesus Christ thinks. We need to think about our wives the way he thinks about his people. And that's what we want to understand today from scripture. The first thing I want to do is I want to take you to several scriptures. that show to us the stoop of God's grace in humility and the eternal love of God that He would call His people. He would actually make them, His people, in a relationship depicted by design to be that between the husband and the wife.

Look with me at a few scriptures. Isaiah chapter 54, for example. Isaiah and chapter 54. I wanna take you to several scriptures, so just keep your Bible open. And he says in Isaiah chapter 54, notice these words, it's startling. It's amazing. It grips us because of how amazing it is. Verse five, for thy maker is thine husband.

The Lord of hosts, the Lord of heaven's army is his name, and thy redeemer is the Holy One of Israel. The God of the whole earth shall he be called. All right, so this is telling us that God himself, the creator, is the Lord of heaven's armies, and he is the Redeemer of his people. He's the God of the whole earth, and he is the husband of his people. He is your husband.

That's what God is saying. Look with me at Isaiah chapter 62. In Isaiah 62, he says in verse five, For as a young man marrieth a virgin, so shall thy sons marry thee. And as the bridegroom, notice these words, as the bridegroom rejoiceth over the bride, so shall thy God rejoice over thee. Now that is an incomprehensible grace, isn't it? As a man who has a wife, We know something about the emotions that are being described here, as the bridegroom rejoices over the bride.

It's not too much of a stretch to say, I don't think, it's not too much of a stretch to say that since the dawn of history until our present day, that there has been more energy, More art, more thoughts expended on the relationship between a man and a woman than on any other thing.

You hear it on the radio, in music, in poetry, in literature, on television, in movies. It's everywhere. Valentine's Day, everything is all about this, isn't it? This relationship between a man and a woman. And so we know intuitively that the attraction of a man to his bride is the strongest attraction that there is. That's a God-given thing, that the attraction of a man to his wife is the strongest attraction that I know on earth.

And this will, you know, you've heard these statements, a face can, you know, How does it go? A picture paints a thousand words. A face can launch a thousand ships. It's because the heart is moved by this relationship. It's what God has designed. And this is something we know intuitively, don't we? We know it intuitively.

A man will stand up and do things unbelievable to have his bride. God is saying, God who needs nothing, who has everything, everything comes from him, all things, life and breath flow from him, he needs nothing. He says concerning his people, as the bridegroom rejoices over the bride, so shall thy God rejoice over thee. This is the highest possible love that a man can have, a love he has for his wife. Look at Isaiah 61, just back up a few verses. In verse 10, this is speaking about the church, the Lord's people, when he says, I will greatly rejoice in the Lord. My soul shall be joyful in my God. Why? Well, here's why. For he hath clothed me with the garments of salvation. He hath covered me with the robe of righteousness.

As a bridegroom decketh himself with ornaments, you can see a king putting on his princely, his richest, most illustrious clothes on the day of his wedding. And as a bride adorneth herself with jewels, this is also true of the wife. She puts on her best clothes, she fixes her hair, she paints her face, she puts on her jewels, she adorns herself for her husband. He says, as a bridegroom adorneth herself with her jewels.

God himself in the person of the Lord Jesus Christ has prepared himself in this way and he has prepared his people by giving them the beauty that he finds to be beautiful. the garments of salvation, which are the robe of His righteousness. And these are the finest jewels. We have no righteousness. In ourselves, all that we do, the very best that we do, is called, in Scripture, filthy rags. So there's no beauty in us.

Now when I look at my wife, especially I remember when we were younger before we got married, she was very attractive to me. She looked beautiful to me. I liked the way she talked, I liked the things she said, her manners, everything about her was interesting to me. Her natural gifts and beauty attracted her to me.

But with the Lord, it's different. God is not influenced by things outside of him. God didn't look for something in his people to attract him to them. And this is so important, but hard for us to grasp, that the love that Christ has for his people is the love of God. And it's the love of God that finds no motive outside of God. And therefore, this love is holy, and this love is eternal, and this love is saving, and this love is loyal and faithful. It never ends. It's the same yesterday, today, and forever, because it is God himself loving. His nature, everything that he is towards his people brings everything that he finds attractive and he gives it to them, provides it for them in his love.

Can you explain this? One of the faults that we have is that we say things like, what was there in me to merit esteem? That's the wrong question. It's always from God. When we begin to think about ourselves, then we get very uncomfortable, very unsure, very uncertain and insecure. And we begin to prop ourselves up or to look for causes. That's wrong thinking. All of this has to come from God in grace.

It's unspeakable grace in comprehensible love. And so the Lord is saying here, as the bridegroom adorns himself with his finest clothes and all of his riches, and the bride also does that, yet the Lord himself has put this beauty upon his people. He has of himself loved his wife, his people. The Lord, our maker, is our husband. He who created all things, for whom all things were created. This was his highest motive.

All right, let's look now at the New Testament. Look at John, the gospel of John in chapter three. In John chapter three and verse 29, he says this. John the Baptist is speaking. He says, he that has the bride is the bridegroom. So you can see here that he's talking about the Lord Jesus Christ. Verses before this, he said, he's the son of God. He's the lamb of God, which takes away the sin of the world. And now he says, he's the bridegroom. And he was talking about this in the context that all people were coming to the Lord Jesus Christ.

John the Baptist was the greatest prophet that ever lived, and yet people were leaving him to go to Christ. And John's disciples were envious for John's sake, and they came to him and they told him about this, and he said, no, no. He that has the bride is the bridegroom.

You see, so you can see that this is clearly talking about the grace of God that he would make his people, his bride. Look at 2 Corinthians, in 2 Corinthians chapter 11. This is plain, isn't it? The Lord, the God of the whole earth, the Holy One, the Redeemer. He has of himself, out of his own heart, has found his people to be his life's love. He says here in 2 Corinthians chapter 11 and verse 2, Paul, the apostle says, I'm jealous over you with a godly jealousy. Godly, that means this is a holy thing. This jealousy of Paul for the people of the Lord is a godly jealousy. For I have espoused you to one husband. A spouse means put in wedlock. One husband, that I may present you as a chaste virgin to Christ. So you are the chaste virgin married to Christ. That's what he's saying to the believers.

These people in Corinthians, they had so many problems. So many problems. Some questioned the resurrection. Some were getting drunk instead of at the Lord's table and not waiting for others to eat. And others, another man had his father's wife, just corrupt, perverse things. And yet in the very first epistle to the Corinthians, in the very first part, he calls them the holy ones, the saints of God. And here he says, I'm jealous over you with a godly jealousy.

I've espoused you to one husband, to Christ. Now that tells us something important here, that the marriage between a man and a woman, like the more important marriage between Christ and his people, is a marriage of one man to one woman. Christ is not married to every person. He's married to his people.

You see, this is significant. I heard something today, and I can't even remember what it was, but it reminded me of this, that we often talk about things particularly, and no one's offended by it, but when God speaks of the love the redeeming love of the Lord Jesus Christ for his people.

It is a distinguishing love, a distinguishing redemption. And it is a love that brings about the relationship to them that he intends by that love. Song of Solomon in chapter eight, it says, love is stronger than death. Love is stronger than death. Christ's love for his people overcame death. He rose from the dead and they rose with him. He overcame the death that they were under because of their sin. This love is portrayed in many ways, the love between Christ and his people as the love between a man for his wife.

This is God's design. God designed this from the very beginning. This is the way it was. Look at Revelation chapter 19. I'm just trying to show you how frequently God speaks about this relationship. And how actually it is the consummation. It is the consummate purpose of God in this. And we see how this is. He says in Revelation chapter 19. He says in Revelation 19 verse 7, let us be glad and rejoice and give honor to him, the Lord God who reigns.

For the marriage of the lamb is come. and his wife has made herself ready. You see, the Lord Jesus Christ loved this wife, his people. And the way that she became ready is that the Lord made her ready. But in scripture, God talks about God purifying our hearts through faith. When we see Christ, we realize that all of our sin, is cleansed, all of our holiness is given to us, all of our righteousness is given to us in Christ by his blood, by his offering of himself. And so the wife has made herself ready by looking to her husband to provide for her everything in himself. And this is the role of a husband to provide for his wife. Look at Revelation 21. Oh, I'm sorry, in verse 8 of Revelation 19, to continue.

And to her, to the wife, Christ's wife, was granted that she should be arrayed in fine linen. It was given to her, clean and white. It speaks of the holiness of her clothes. For the fine linen is the righteousness of the saints. It's Christ working out, but it's given to them, and now it's theirs. It's not in them, it's in Him, but it's perfect in Him and it is counted theirs because of their union with Him. This is a hard thing for us to grasp.

The basis of our death is what? Sin. Remember, the wages of sin is death. So we die because of sin, but we sinned in Adam. We were there when he sinned against God and God imputed. He charged us with that sin as a crime that brought the penalty of death as a debt. We owed God. His justice demanded our death.

So we understand something about this in this first portrait God gives of this relationship to the Lord Jesus Christ. Because in Adam, we sinned, we disobeyed, and we became sinners, and therefore we died. But here, God is telling us that in the same way, only much more glorious and much more eternally, God has given us to his son. Because God joined us to him in his eternal choice, in his predestinating purpose of love, therefore all that Christ did, we did in him.

And what did he do? He bore everything that we did as if he had done it before God to bear it before God as in satisfaction to God and endure the penalty of it in himself. God made him to be sin for us who knew no sin, that we might be made the righteousness of God in him, you see.

And so this is what the Lord is talking about. The fine linen is the righteousness of the saints. It's Christ's obedience in His death, bearing our sins, bearing them before God in holiness, in satisfaction, in love for His people, in love to His Father, so that His love of obedience in this is our righteousness. It's given to us.

Look at now Revelation 21. In Revelation 21, we have the consummation of history. We have the final climactic revelation and the consummation of all of God's eternal purposes brought to fruition in the scene that's presented to us here. And he says in verse one, you can see, I saw a new heaven. Everything before is passed away. I saw a new heaven and a new earth, for the first heaven and the first earth were passed away and there was no more sea." No more judgment, no more floods of God's wrath, no more separation now. He says, and I, John, saw the holy city, new Jerusalem, not an earthly place, not Israel on earth.

Israel in heaven, God's dwelling place, where God's glory is seen continuously, the light of Christ. He says, I saw the holy city, New Jerusalem, coming down from God out of heaven prepared as a bride adorned for her husband. That's God's people, collectively. at once, being brought by God out of heaven, prepared for Christ in all the beauty of the Lord Jesus Christ in his saving work. And look at the same chapter in verse 10. And he carried me away. Revelation 2110, he carried me away in the spirit to a great and high mountain, and he showed me that great city, the holy Jerusalem, descending out of heaven from God.

Notice, having the glory of God. This was not her own glory. This was the glory put on her, the glory of Christ, of his redeeming blood, of his eternal love. So now you can see that through these scriptures, it's plain that God in Christ married his people.

There was nothing in them to attract him. There was everything in them to put him back, to make him offended, to find them repugnant and loathsome. This is the question we need to think about. How could Christ, who loves righteousness and hates iniquity, love a sinner? That boggles the mind. It seems like a contradiction. How could God, in Christ, who loves holiness, who loves righteousness and hates iniquity, love a sinner?

Well, he loved them in the wisdom of his grace by making himself, who had all things, making himself poor. in order that out of his poverty, the poverty of becoming a servant by taking their nature into union with his divine nature and in that nature bearing their sins as his own before God and in that nature offering himself in sacrifice of blood for their sins in satisfaction to God in all of his perfections.

It was it was that that made them holy. They took away their sins. He washed them from their sins in his own blood. He redeemed them from the the debt of their sins and their lawful imprisonment under that debt, under the wrath of God. He redeemed them from that by his own blood, bearing the curse of God's law to remove that wrath from them and to set them at liberty. not just from their sins, and not just in righteousness, but as the children of God, the sons of God, because they were joined to Him who is the Son of God. And the Son of God, the Spirit of God's dear Son, is sent into their hearts. Because He redeemed them by His blood, He made them holy, He clothed them in His righteousness, and justified them in that righteousness before God.

And therefore, the Spirit of life is given to them, and breathes that life into them, and gives them faith to see My Redeemer. my holy one, my righteousness, the one who washed me from my sins in his own blood. And the heart of that sinner is made pure by faith in looking to Christ, who is their holiness and righteousness and redemption.

Look at 1 Corinthians 1. In 1 Corinthians 1, God tells us how he made us beautiful in the Lord Jesus Christ. God the Father did this. He says in 1 Corinthians 1 and verse 30, he says, but of him, of God the Father, are you in Christ Jesus. That word means joined to, one with, inseparable. And God the Father did this. You do not make yourself one with Christ. Okay, he says, but of him are you in Christ Jesus, who of God is made unto us. Christ Jesus himself, having been joined to him, now he is made by God to us.

Wisdom. and righteousness, and sanctification, and redemption, that according as it is written, he that glorieth, let him glory in the Lord. You boast, your only boast is Jesus Christ and him crucified. He is your wisdom, he's your righteousness, he's your holiness, he's your redemption, he's your all. If you're the Lord's, if you look to Him as your husband to provide all for you, to take your debt, all your obligations, and by His blood to pay the debt, to purchase your liberty at the price of the ransom of Himself offered to God. He didn't come to be served, He came to serve and give His life a ransom for many. This is the Lord Jesus Christ.

Now, I remember at my My daughter's wedding, I think both of my daughters, I said this, I don't remember, but I remember thinking this. Was it? When the Lord says to us in Colossians 3, 19, husbands love your wives, and be not bitter against them. And in Ephesians chapter five, he says, where Brad read for us, he says in Ephesians five, he says in verse 25, husbands love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church. Ask yourself this question, husbands, what was Christ's greatest desire? What delighted Him?

What caused Him to, Him who is God, the Son of God, the eternal, uncreated, sovereign ruler of all things, the Son of God, what caused Him to take our nature into union with Himself forever? What was it? Well, it was because we were his children by God's gift, the Father's gift.

But what was this desire that he had, having been given a people by his father to him to love? What was his desire? It was to have them. It was to give himself for them. His joy, his life, what caused him to, what quenched his thirst, was to give himself for his people and give himself to his people.

Sometimes you hear people describing marriage as a give and take. Well, you know, you have to give and you have to take. I mean, it's not just a one-way street. Think about the Lord Jesus' husbands. Was it give and take? Did he give in order to take or did he just give? Did he delight in taking, or did he delight in giving? And did he give for a moment, or did he give himself forever?

It says in Exodus 21, that if a man is a servant, if a man has a Hebrew slave, a servant, and that, let me just read it to you, it's put there so eloquently, I'll just read it to you, Exodus chapter 21. This is the Lord Jesus Christ. He says this, because this overlaps. He says in verse two, Exodus 21, verse two, if thou buy a Hebrew servant, six years shall he serve. In the seventh, he should go out free for nothing. That means six is represents the work, the time of work. In the seventh year, the year represented the year of rest, he goes out free for nothing. He doesn't have to pay for his freedom, he's free.

If he came in by himself, he should go out by himself. If he were married, then his wife shall go out with him. But if his master have given him a wife, and she have born him sons or daughters, the wife and her children shall be her masters, and he shall go out by himself. And if the servant shall plainly say, I love my master, my wife, and my children, I will not go out free. Then his master shall bring him to the judges, and he shall also bring him to the door, or unto the doorpost, and his master shall bore his ear through with an awl, and he shall serve him forever.

The Lord Jesus Christ is this servant. This prophecy is of him. He made himself a servant. Philippians 2 says, let this mind be in you, which was also in Christ Jesus, who being in the form of God, thought it not robbery to be made equal with God? but made himself of no reputation, and took upon him the form of a servant, and was made in the likeness of men, and being found in fashion as a man, he humbled himself and became obedient unto death, even the death of the cross. Wherefore God had highly exalted him." You see this? He served God forever. in love for his master, in love for his wife, in love for his children. The delight that delighted Christ's heart was to give himself. That gave him drink of water, like when he asked the woman at the well, give me to drink.

A woman who had six husbands and the seventh was not her husband she was living with. An unclean woman, publicly known to be shameful and reproachful. And the Lord Jesus Christ says to her, give me to drink. She says, why are you asking me a drink? You're a Jew, I'm a woman of Samaria. He says, if you knew the gift of God, you would have asked Me, and I would have given you living water. And at the end of the account, he says to his disciples, they said, Lord, eat, eat. He says, oh, I have meat to eat that you know not of.

When he saved this woman, revealed himself to her, he quenched his thirst, he fed himself, giving and giving and giving and giving, unendingly of himself for her and to her. This is what he does for his bride. And he defends her. He provides himself for her, and he defends her. Remember in John chapter eight, the woman taken in adultery, and the Pharisees, the scribes, they come and said, Master, this woman was caught in the very act.

Moses said, stoner, what do you say? Well, he stoops down, he writes on the ground. He doesn't say a word. He stands up. He says, let him that's without sin. Cast the first stone, he stoops down again. They're all convicted in their conscience. They all leave one by one. He rises up again, having first written the law and then stooping to fulfill the law.

And he says to the woman, woman, where are your accusers? Has no man condemned you? And she said, no man, Lord. And he said, neither do I condemn thee, go and sin no more. You see, this is the way Christ treats his people. He defends them. All charges against them are legitimate, but he takes them. And he answers every charge. And then he pleads God's glory for their salvation. And this was the delight of his heart. when the Lord gave himself for his people, it was a people given to him.

Look at Ephesians chapter one. Ephesians chapter one. He says in verse three of Ephesians chapter one, blessed be the God and Father. This is talking about God the Father. Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ who has blessed us with all spiritual blessings in heavenly places in Christ. God is saying here, everything, every blessing, every blessing in heaven is given to you in Christ.

And this was according to, he says in the next verse, according as, here's the beginning of it, as He hath chosen us in Him. That's the way we were joined to Him. God the Father joined us to Christ in His choice of us. According as He hath chosen us in Him before the foundations of the world were laid.

That we should be, this is the purpose, that we should be holy, and without blame before Him in love." Before God the Father, He chose us in Christ in order that we should be holy. Not because we were, but because He would make us holy in Christ. All heavenly blessings, especially this, that you would be before God the Father, before Him, holy, without blame. If God the Father compromised at the slightest shadow of compromise to allow you into His presence, He would not be God. His nature would contradict that. He cannot compromise. It has to be holy.

And so God, our Father, said in his heart. Before time, before the foundations of the world were laid, He was pleased to bring many sons to glory. And He would do this from a people who in themselves were sinful and unholy, and He would do it by first, before He created them, giving them to His Son. and in his son they would be made holy and blameless and before him would be presented and brought into his presence as his children in love. This was God's purpose. And it was for the glory of His grace.

He says in verse 5, this is God the Father still having predestinated us unto the adoption of children by Jesus Christ to Himself. So here we see the mystery that God the Father made us His children by Jesus Christ because He gave us to Him. in order to redeem us and having redeemed us would give us his spirit. And therefore we would be joined to him in spirit, having been made holy by his blood, joined to him in spirit. And we would be made one with the Lord Jesus Christ in every aspect in God's purpose, by redeeming blood and by the spiritual union we have with Christ through the spirit of God.

This is what God the Father did. Now, look at look on it, verse chapter one. In verse 11, in whom, in Christ, we have obtained an inheritance. We're heirs of God, children of God, being predestinated according to the purpose of him who works all things after the counsel of his own will. God doesn't do anything except what his will dictates. But look at verse 22.

He says, and he has put all things under his feet, Christ. and gave him, gave Christ, to be the head over all things to the church. You see this? God the Father not only gave his people to his son, but he made him to be the head over everything for his church. But here's the thing. When the Lord Jesus Christ was given his people from God the Father, you know what he saw? This is my father's. Love, this is, these people are holy because God the Father has set them apart.

It pleased him to have these people as his children and he's given them to me to be my bride, to be my brethren, to be my sisters and my brothers, my wife. Look at Song of Solomon, chapter four. Song of Solomon, if I can find it. It's a tricky little book to find. It's between Isaiah and Ecclesiastes, between Ecclesiastes and Isaiah. Song of Solomon, chapter four, read verse nine.

This is the Lord Jesus Christ speaking to his people, his bride, his wife. He says to her, thou has ravished my heart, my sister, my spouse. They have the same father, so she is his sister. But she is also his bride, his spouse, his wife, because God the Father gave his children to his son to be both his wife and his people, his sister, his brethren. He says, you've ravished my heart. My sister, my spouse, thou hast ravished my heart with one of thine eyes, with one chain of thy neck." Everything about her, there's no spot. I see no spot in thee, he says in verse 7. He says in verse 7, thou art all fair, my love, there is no spot in thee. You see, God can't have a people who are anything less than pure and holy.

And the only way they could be that is in the Lord Jesus Christ. And therefore, he gave us to the Lord Jesus Christ to be his own bride, his wife. And as we just read in Ephesians 5, Christ loved the church and gave himself for it. Now I have to ask you some questions here, otherwise we won't finish this sermon today. Because in Ephesians chapter five, I gotta read this to you. I was about to close for time's sake, but let me read this to you just briefly here in Ephesians five. Notice here, this is the love of Christ. This is the love of the Lord Jesus Christ. What did his love do? Chapter five, verse two.

Walk in love as Christ also hath loved us and has given himself for us an offering and a sacrifice to God for a sweet-smelling savor. You see, the Lord Jesus Christ gave himself for his people, totally, but not just give himself like we might do aimlessly. He had a point in it. He gave himself to God. in sacrifice as an offering. It was holy. It was accepted. And it's seen here by the sweet smelling savor it was to God when he offered himself in love for his people, giving himself in total.

He says in same chapter, chapter five, he says in verse twenty three, for the husband, that would be me in my case to Denise or Brad to Lisa or Tom to Debbie or whatever, for the husband is the head of the wife. I know what we think. Yeah, that means she has to do what I say. Woman, submit. Listen to it. The husband's the head. You're not the head. I'm the boss. Do what I say.

That's the way God designed it. Have you ever seen anyone happily, joyfully, lovingly submit to such a tyrant? They can't happen. There's only one way that we are going to obey Christ. If we see his love to us, a love that began in him, a love that is upheld in him and continues in him without any regard to what we are or have, and in spite of our sin, found glory in saving us from our sins to himself for his grace and giving us all things with himself.

So he says here, The husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church. In the same way, he gave himself for her. Fellas, if you want to be the head, then you have to do as Christ did. And he's the savior of the body. He gave himself to save her. He says in verse 25, husbands love your wives even as Christ loved the church and gave himself for it.

Why did he give himself love? When did he give himself? Well, he gave himself at the cross. But he was the lamb slain from the foundation of the world. And his love predated his offering, therefore his love also predated the foundations of the world.

And so in Jeremiah 31.3 he says, I have loved thee with an everlasting love. an everlasting love. Therefore, with loving kindness have I drawn thee."

We're drawn because of His love. We're redeemed because of His love. If we're not drawn, We weren't loved. If we're not redeemed, then we're not loved. But if we are loved, we're drawn and redeemed because of the eternal love of Christ for his people because God the Father loved us and gave us to him to make us holy and present us to himself as his children without blame in love.

Our union with Christ is everything and this union is a union of grace. The bond of this union is the eternal love of Christ. The love of God which is in Christ Jesus our Lord. Husbands, when you consider the love of Christ for you as a sinner, then you love your wife. because God, for Christ's sake, has forgiven you and loved you. And as God loves you for Christ's sake, so you love your wife. Don't be bitter against them. The Lord Jesus wasn't bitter against his bride. He gave himself. He gave himself. He gives himself. He will never stop giving himself to his people. He is our life. He is our righteousness. He's everything to us. Let's pray.

Father, thank you for your word that tells us eternal things that are hidden until you reveal them, glorious things that show us your great majesty in them, your glory in these things, your mercy and your grace. Thank you for the full provision in our Lord Jesus Christ, who made himself our husband according to your eternal will of grace. And he gave us his own spirit to know these things. Help us to be renewed day by day. Help us, Lord, to remind one another of this, to remember these things and never think or look to ourselves, but to look to our husband, our heavenly savior, redeemer, our God, our maker. In his name we pray, amen.

Husbands, Love your wives

Key Quotes

What does the Bible say about husbands loving their wives?

Why is it important for husbands not to be bitter against their wives?

How do we know that Christ's love for the Church is true?

Why does God command husbands to love their wives as Christ loved the Church?

How does God's design for marriage reflect His relationship with His people?

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Husbands, Love your wives

Key Quotes

What does the Bible say about husbands loving their wives?

Why is it important for husbands not to be bitter against their wives?

How do we know that Christ's love for the Church is true?

Why does God command husbands to love their wives as Christ loved the Church?

How does God's design for marriage reflect His relationship with His people?

Sermon Transcript

About Rick Warta

Comments

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