If you will, turn back with me
to the book of Psalms, chapter 46. Psalm 46. Psalm is very short. Let us read
it. God is our refuge and strength,
a very present help in trouble. Therefore will not we fear, though
the earth be removed, and though the mountains be carried into
the midst of the sea? Though the waters thereof roar
and be troubled, though the mountains shake with the swelling thereof,
there is a river The streams whereof shall make glad the city
of God, the holy place of the tabernacles of the Most High. God is in the midst of her, she
shall not be moved. God shall help her, and that
right early. The heathen raged, the kingdoms
were moved. He uttered his voice, and the
earth melted. The Lord of Hosts is with us.
The God of Jacob is our refuge, Selah. Come, behold the works
of the Lord. What desolations he hath made
in the earth! He maketh wars to cease unto
the end of the earth. He breaketh the bow, and cutteth
the spear in sunder. He burneth the chariot in the
fire. Be still and know that I am God. I will be exalted among the heathen. I will be exalted in the earth. The Lord of hosts is with us. The God of Jacob is our refuge. Pause and think of that. Charles Haddon Spurgeon had a
message on this psalm that he called earthquake but not heartquake. Very seldom in this world do
we live a day when our hearts are not tried, when our hearts
are not tested, when we do not come up against something that
tries our courage and our faith. Well the doctrine of this psalm
is happen what may The Lord's people are happy and secure. This psalm is the song of holy
confidence. This psalm is a song for all
who are truly the people of God, truly the chosen of God, those
who have been called by the irresistible grace of God into that one fold. Oh, call to be his own people. To have this fearless courage
spoken of in this psalm is the lot of these that are the chosen
of the Lord. And beloved, we ought to have
it if we're God's people. We ought to be very bold in laying
hold of the scriptures and the truths and the promises of the
Word of God and making them our very own. The Bible says in Philippians
4 and verse 7, that the peace of God, which passeth all understanding,
will keep the hearts and the minds of all who come before
God in prayer and thanksgiving, in submission to Him and to His
will. God will keep them in perfect
peace because their minds and hearts are stayed on Him. He is the faithful God. He is
the true promise keeper. And you can trust the God of
the Bible to keep His word, not one word. that ever came forth
out of his mouth has ever failed. If indeed the Lord be our refuge
and strength, we're entitled to seek after a spirit which
shall bear us above the dreads of common men. Oh, to be victorious
in our blessed God, and to lay hold of enough truth out of the
Word of God to lift us up in these dark and difficult days,
to cheer our hearts and our souls onward in our pilgrimage. Now
it is evident that it is not every man that can sing this
psalm with meaning. You must be a believer on the
Lord Jesus Christ. The Bible says that without faith
It is impossible to please Him, for they that cometh unto Him
must believe that He is, and that He is a rewarder of them
that diligently seek Him. Without faith you cannot please
God, my friend. Without faith you cannot receive
from Him the boldness and the courage and the strength to face
the difficulties of life and to be an overcomer. You must
have God to be your God and you must be a prayerful soul or you
cannot sing this song of praise amid the commotion and the calamity
of this world. Now while this is a psalm for
all Israel, it was especially, I think, a psalm for the sons
of Korah. Korah, Dathan, and Abiram perished
because of their presumption, you know, toward Moses and toward
God's call of Him to deliver the children of Israel. And you
remember that the earth opened up and swallowed them up. They
and all that appertained unto them were swallowed up. But we
read in the book of Numbers 26 in verse 9 through 11, and in
verse 11 especially, and we're very astonished to read indeed,
that notwithstanding the children of Korah did not, they did not
perish. And so God in sovereign mercy
and sovereign grace, and I attribute their escape to the sovereign
grace of God who spared them. Now they were a division of the
Levites. They were made singers in the
courts of the Lord. And surely they would sing with
emphasis these words in verse 2. Therefore will we not fear,
though the earth be removed, and though the mountains be carried
into the midst of the sea." Surely they would sing this song as
they rose to sing. They saw the earth open her mouth
and swallow up the offenders of their household while they
themselves were preserved by God's sovereign grace. Surely
there must have been tears in their eyes. when they sang these
words and thought of the earth opening up at their feet and
their relatives and kinfolk falling in and perishing forever and
they themselves spared. Well, I believe the circumstances
under which a man is saved will influence the rest of his life.
Delivered from so great a death, believers learn to trust that
the Lord will yet deliver them. who delivered us from so great
a death, and doth deliver in whom we trust that he will yet
deliver us. 2 Corinthians 1 and verse 10. Our lives are just one deliverance
after another. One deliverance after another.
That's been my experience. Salvation yesterday, salvation
today, salvation tomorrow. God's deliverance. is always
with his people. They experience the Lord's deliverance. You remember Psalm 34 and verse
19? It says, Many are the afflictions of the righteous, but the Lord
delivers them out of them all. God is a delivering God. He's
a God of salvation. And that word salvation is a
big word. And it covers not only the redemption
of our souls, but it covers all of the deliverances that we experience
in our lifetime as we go on our way from this life unto glory. Well then, first of all, let
us look at this confidence of the saints. This is a psalm,
as we said, of holy confidence. And second, we'll talk a little
bit about the courage which grows out of the confidence that the
saints have. And thirdly, we will close by
looking at some of the conflicts in life which that courage will
be sure to expose. First of all, then, let us consider
the confidence of the saints of God. God's people have a sure
confidence. God is our refuge and strength,
a very present help in trouble. True believers rest upon the
rock of ages. In Isaiah chapter 36 and verse
4, the king of Assyria sent a letter to Hezekiah and asked the question,
what confidence is this wherein thou trustest? Well, Jeremiah
17 verse 7 says, Blessed is the man that trusteth in the Lord,
and whose hope the Lord is. So, beloved, this is our confidence
and our hope. It's in the Lord. It's in the
living God. It's in the God of heaven and
earth. It's in that God who does according
to his own will in the earth and in heaven above. The confidence
of God's people is all together beyond themselves. They do not
now nor did they ever trust in their own virtue, their own valor,
their own wisdom. Though the earth be removed.
He is undismayed, and this does not arise from his own personal
self-sufficiency, but from the God who is his refuge and strength. The child of God is fearless,
not because of his original stoutness of heart and natural firmness
of will, but because he has a God to shelter and to uphold him. The Lord of hosts is with us. Now he has a God to shelter him. He has a God to uphold him. If
he does not fear calamity, it is because he fears God and God
alone. God is over all and he is all
in all. And he does not fear calamitous
situation. Our psalm begins with God and
with God it ends. The God of Jacob is our refuge. We may be timid by nature, but
God is our refuge, and we will not be timid in the way, because
God is indeed our refuge and strength. We're weak by nature,
but God is indeed our strength. Beloved, we never know what strength
is till our own weakness drives us to trust in the God of the
Bible, to trust the arm of omnipotence. Now, I don't know whether you've
ever come there or not, But my friend, if you've come to that
place where you felt your own weakness by nature, and know
that you're not able to stand in and of yourself, and to know
that your strength must be a derived strength, a strength from God,
then my friend, you're resting this morning upon the omnipotence
of God, and truly this is indeed your confidence. We never know
how safe our refuge is until all other refuge fail us. All other refuges are lies. Have you come to see that in
experience? And that God and God only is
the only safe refuge. And when we're driven to that,
oh, when the earth is removed and the waters of the sea roar
and are troubled, being as it were driven both from land and
sea, the child of God hides himself in God, his refuge, and his strength. Now if we look to ourselves for
courage, We shall fail in the hour of trial because we're broken
reeds and there is no resource, there's no strength outside of
God's strength. Certainly we need courage in
this hour. We need courage to face the difficulties
and the struggles and the decisions of life and the changes of life. We need much courage. Oh, my friend, you may say, well,
I'm young and healthy, and I really don't need that message. Well,
my friend, you wait a few years. You get on down the pike a little
while, and you will find out that you need this courage from
God to face everyday life. not only the difficult times,
but everyday life, you need this courage. The man who trusteth
in his own heart, the Bible says in Proverbs 23 and 26, that he
is a fool, and whosoever walketh wisely shall be delivered from
his own heart. And we must pray that God will
deliver us from our own mind, our own natural thinking, our
own decisions, and our own ways, that God will deliver us. Next,
this confidence is gained, I think, by an appropriating faith. Don't forget this personal, possessive
word, our, in the text. God is our refuge and strength. Now brother, sister, peace comes
to me, and not only by what God is, but by what God is to me. This is so important that we
see this. This psalm is meaningless unless
this God is my God. Unless He's our God. Unless we
can lay hold of that, then my friend, this psalm won't mean
anything to us. God is our refuge and strength,
this God is our God, and you will never enjoy the goodness
and the greatness of God if you look at them in an abstract manner. You must grasp them as your own,
as your very own. Jeremiah said, the Lord is my
portion, saith my soul, therefore will I hope in Him. The Lord
is my portion. Now every true heaven-born child
of God, washed in the blood, filled with the Holy Spirit of
God can say, the Lord is my portion. He is indeed my portion. You say, well he may belong to
everybody else, but I'm not sure he belongs to me. Then you need
to question your foundation to see if the root of the matter
be in you. If the root of the matter is
in you, then this God is indeed, you can say with Jeremiah, the
Lord is my portion, saith my soul, therefore will I hope in
him. That deep peace and settled confidence,
which is our right and privilege as a child of the King will not
be ours unless by faith we take the Lord to be ours in all the
fullness of his love and grace. Let us each say, God is our Lord. refuge and strength. Would it bother you? Would it
hinder you any? Would it mess up your day if
you were to say right now, out loud, God is our refuge and strength? Would it bother you? Well, I
don't hear anybody saying it. But God is our refuge and strength. Now this confidence will be strengthened
and sustained by a clear knowledge of God. By a clear knowledge
of our God. The Bible says, acquaint thyself
with God and be at peace. Thereby good shall come unto
thee. Now poor soul, you would be much
happier if you knew the Lord better. if you just knew him
better. The philosophers tell us that
the proper study of mankind is man. That is a deporably, deporably
barren subject. We say that the proper study
of mankind is God. Yet he is only known by revelation. Now he's not hiding from his
own. We ought to know more about God
than we did a year ago today. Do we know, are we increasingly,
are we increasing in the knowledge of God? Are we growing in the
grace and knowledge of our God? Every child of God ought to be
able to speak of Him in a three-fold description as our refuge, our
strength, and a very present help in trouble. They ought to
be able to say out of experience, I know this, I have learned this,
I know my God. I have traveled with my God,
I've walked with my God, I'm in fellowship with my God, and
I've learned this by experience that He's our refuge, our strength,
and is a very present help in time of trouble. Now the more
we know the Lord, the more we see the fullness of the blessings
that are in Him. The Lord hath done great things
for us, the psalmist said it in another place, for which we're
glad. He's done great things for us.
Well, I know that if you know the Lord, and you've been in
the way any length of time, that God has done great things for
you, and He's manifested Himself to you, and He's come by your
door, He's come to visit you in your calamitous situations,
and He's been your Deliverer. Now, the blessings that are in
Him, these blessings, we need to know about. Oh, I read a story
one time about a lady that had come into a fortune, but she
was living as a pauper, and she continued to live. She wouldn't
believe what she was told, that she had come into a fortune,
and she lived out her days as a pauper. And so many of the
children of God are living beneath their privileges when they will
not believe what the Word of God says, when they will not
read it, when they will not study it. Somebody suggested the other
day that every person should read the Bible 15 minutes a day.
Well, I think that would certainly be a good start. But we need
to know the Lord. We need to know Him better. And
Paul, he was a saved man, but he said, Oh, that I might know
Him and the power of His resurrection and the fellowship of His suffering,
that I might know Him. Listen, beloved, your peace will
be far fuller and deeper if you know the deep things of God.
and the secret things which God reveals to His own by His Spirit. I know that there are things
that the eye has not seen, that the ear has not heard, and that
has not entered into the heart of man. But God, Paul says, has
revealed them. He has revealed them unto us
by His Spirit. And so we need to know these
deep things of God. And you will not be afraid of
evil tidings. I sense your heart is fixed,
trusting in the Lord who is so revealed in the Bible. Now if
you're a timid and fearful believer, seek to grow, my friend, in the
knowledge of God that you'll be able to say, therefore, will
not we fear though the earth be removed? I believe that half
of our fears are the results of ignorance. Half of our fears,
let me say it again, are because of our ignorance. I exhort all
believers present to dwell much in the presence of God and ask
to be instructed in the nature and the character of the attributes
of God, the purpose, the promise, and the providence of the covenant
God of Israel, the covenant God of the spiritual Israel. All
saved people are spiritual Israel, and so we need to be instructed
in his character, his attributes, and his purpose and his promises.
Solid peace and confidence, which no calamity can destroy, must
come from God, from God appropriated, and from God growingly known. you can mark it down. Number
two, the courage which grows out of this confidence, this
holy confidence that believers have. Now this courage is full
and complete, therefore we will not fear, we will not fear, we
will not fear. David said in another place when
I'm afraid I'll just trust in the Lord and he said in another
place I'll just trust in the Lord and not be afraid fear my
friend cripples a child of God and we Best not be fearful of
anything other than to fear the living God if you fear God you
need not fear and anything else. The presence of God does so stay
the soul and quite the heart that the fear that hath torment
is driven away. Can you say this morning honestly
that you're not a fearful soul? That you're just a believing
soul? You know the Bible says the fearful and the unbelieving
shall have their part in the lake which burns with fire. the
fearful and the unbelieving. Now I know what it is to be in
a position where that very fearful and very unbelieving. I don't
know whether there's anybody here can identify with that or
not. But I do want you to know that God will say to you, He
will speak to you, the fearful and the unbelieving shall have
their part in the lake which burns with fire. God's people
must trust the Lord and go straight ahead. They must believe God. And when there's decisions to
be made about your security, about your future, about what
you're going to do with your life and your children and your
family, You must be believing. The just shall live by faith. They believe God. They trust
God. They appropriate the promises
of the Word of God to their own soul. And they do not succumb
to fear and unbelief. They must trust in the living
God. The base nature of man is fearful. It could not be otherwise, but
though the grace of God The heaven-born spirit triumphs over nature and
its fear. What I mean to say by that is
that we come into this world fearful. And we'll be fearful
as long as we live in this world unless we anchor our souls in
the faithful God of the Bible. We're perplexed, Paul said, but
we're not in despair. This world we know is full of
danger, and yet we know that we are in no danger. Is that
a true statement? The world is full of danger.
You could get in trouble in five minutes, more trouble than you
can get out of the rest of your life. Fact is, you can get in
more trouble just in the time it takes you to sign your name
than you'll ever get out of the rest of your life. You can get
in all kinds of serious, serious problems in this world, but the
child of God who is resting in the Lord and who has this holy
boldness and confidence in God, he knows that he is in no danger. The Lord being near, did it not
say that he was a present, a very present help in trouble? I like
that. A very present help in trouble. Oh yes, I do believe God's with
these people. I do believe that God is in fellowship
and communion with these people. I believe that there's no hour
of the day or the night when the people of God are separated
from their God. They are in union with Christ,
and God is their God. And so, listen, the heart, then,
as we are near God, and Him being our help, the heart is placid,
undisturbed, it is peaceful. The old heart is peaceful. How
wonderful, what a blessing, to have a peaceful heart. To be
able just to relax. And say, the will of God be done. Let the Lord do what seems right
in his own eyes. Isn't that all right with you?
Amen? It's all right. For let the Lord
do what seems right to him. That's what old Eli said when
his sons died. Let the Lord do what's right
in his own eyes. So it's good to have a undisturbed,
peaceful heart. You say you're going to miss
your best chance in life, preacher. Well, we'll see. We'll see. We'll wait on the Lord. We'll
trust God. We'll see whether we miss it
or not. Somebody said, you know, preacher,
you don't give enough thought. to life. You know the Lord Jesus
Christ in Matthew chapter 6 said at least three times over, take
no thought for your life. He said can a man live that way? Yes he can live that way if he's
trusting the Lord. Now I know there's a thin line
between faith and foolishness, I know that. But I do know this,
that you can trust God, and if you truly are trusting Him, God
knows it, because the Bible says the Lord knoweth them that trust
in Him, and He will lead and guide and direct you. Now the
peace the believer has is no pretense of peace, but it's a
divine reality which the world can never create. nor destroy. It's a divine reality. It's something
that we know is true. Somebody said prove it. Well,
I don't have to prove it myself. I just will enjoy it. While you're
questioning it, I'll enjoy it. Now this courage is logically
justifiable because no calamity will change God and it will God's
love to earth, to us. Earthquake, tempest, famine,
pestilence, war, these temporal calamities do not touch the vital
matter. Such things have no bearing on
the love of God except maybe to make it more clear. Well,
I like that. I do. I really like that. Because
you know there's times when we see the love of God very clearly
And then there's other times when we just gotta believe that
God loves us. Just gotta believe He does. And
that's very important that we just believe that the God of
the Bible, He changes not. He said to the sons of Jacob,
He said, I am God, I change not, therefore you're not consumed.
Now beloved, as long as You know, the only reason why we still
continue on as we are is because God is immutable. He doesn't
change. His love, no variations, no. His love never changes toward
His people. Suppose that the most awful things
were to occur. Would they not occur according
to God's decree? Can you answer that question?
You say, well, what happens if the earth be removed? Well, this
old earth been here a long time, don't you think? Been here a
long time. And if it were to be removed,
who could move it? Except the God who created it.
He's the only one who could move it. And I do believe that if
he gets ready to move it, he will. I don't have a question
in my mind that he can move this old earth. Do not we believe in a God who
works all things after the counsel of his own will? Isn't that what
Ephesians 1 and verse 11 says? That God works all things after
the counsel of his own will? Do you really believe that anything
is left to chance? Do you? That anything is left
to chance? I don't. Is any event outside
the circle of divine predestination? Now, of course, I mean, I'll
be quick to admit, I'm a Calvinist. I'm a firm Calvinist, a convicted
Calvinist. I can't be anything else. And
so I believe that there are no events outside the circle of
divine predestination. My brother, sister, there are
no contingencies. A chance, somebody said. It's
possible. No, what God has decreed is certain
to happen. It's certain to happen. God guides
all according to his infallible wisdom. Nothing can happen but
what God ordains. Why should we be afraid? You
say, well, it's just a matter of believing that preacher. That's
exactly what I'm talking about. It's a matter of you believing
God. That's what it's all about. Nothing happens without the divine
power being in it. The Lord says, behold, I've created
the smith that bloweth upon the coals in the fire. I've created
the waster to destroy. And the most violent and vicious
and wicked men could not move a finger if strength were not
lent to them by the Lord. We need to face that. And we
need to worship God. Worship God. Quit going around
trying to figure out how you're going to sit in this situation.
Where are you going to be left when this world comes down? It's
coming down. Don't waste your time. Leave
it with the Lord. Trust in the Lord and depend
upon Him. Is it not God who looketh on
the earth? Who shakes the earth? Is it not
God who looketh on it, and it trembleth? This old earth trembles
when God looks at it. I wonder why that would be. Would
it not be because He's the Sovereign Creator? Is it not be because
He spoke it into existence? He couldn't be here without Him
having sustained it, and He upholds it. Oh, to God do you and I tremble. You know, we don't have, we can't
draw a breath apart from the sovereign will of God. And the
earth knows who upholds it and sustains it, and so it trembles
when God looks at it. Ah, do we really believe God? So our Heavenly Father worketh
all things. Our Heavenly Father, our Father. Our Heavenly Father. I've just
got to believe that our Heavenly Father is genuinely concerned
about us. I've just got to believe that
He overrules all to the good of His people. Even what is called
evil is turned to good account toward His people. Our Heavenly
Father. Our Heavenly Father. Merciful. Somebody said the Lord's goodness
extracts the viper's tooth and supplies an antidote to the poison. I believe that. Who is he that
can harm you if you be followers of that which is good? Is that
not also taken from the pages of Holy Scripture? No weapon
that is formed against thee shall prosper, and every tongue that
shall rise against thee in judgment thou shalt condemn. Moreover,
nothing can shake the kingdom of God. Our best possessions
lie in that kingdom, and as long as that is secure, all is safe. The gates of hell, the Bible
says, shall not prevail against that kingdom. Our most vital
interests are safe beyond the shadow of harm. Why should we
fear even the worst thing? Somebody said death. We ought
to fear that, shouldn't we? Well, all depends. All depends. You know, death for the believer means
forever with the Lord. It means that all these earthly
difficulties and struggles are over. It means the day of trouble is over. That's what it means. So should we fear death. Well,
you know, it's death and then glory. You must go through the
one to get to the other. This fearlessness, I should say,
is very profitable. No foolishness about it. No folly. No panic. I'm trusting God. I depend upon the Lord. One thing
more, this courage brings great glory to God. If you can rise above fear in
the time of alarm, the world will be compelled to say, this
is a man who fears God, this is a man who believes God, and
this is God's work upon his soul and in his life. Be still. the psalmist said,
and know that I'm God. Be still, and know that I'm God. Well, a word or two about the
conflicts to which this courage will be exposed. If you become
fearless, that courage will be tried. It will be tried in ways
novel and maybe unusual. Though the earth be removed,
think of it, that's a terrible novelty in the The old earth
has stood, as we said, for ages. And you know, you might ask yourself
the question, how old is my situation? How old is it? You say, I've
been thinking about, I've been dealing with trouble, problems,
preachers you don't know about for a long time. For a long time. Well, that's all right. Are you dealing with them in
faith? Are you trusting God with them? Do you believe God sent
them? If you believe God, go on and trust the Lord. The whole
foundation seems to have slipped from under us. What will we do? The question is asked. Remember
that new trials will bring new grace and prove the value of
old promises. He giveth more grace, the Bible
says in James. Then there are trials that are
mysterious and very threatening. What would you think if you were
to see the mountains carried into the midst of the sea? That's
mysterious indeed, isn't it? They have stood the test of time,
but beloved, some afflictions are like this, and you cannot
understand them. Remember, if all the devils in
hell had a hand in your troubles, you need not fear, because God
is greater than all the demons of hell. Now some trials are
utterly ungovernable, though the waters thereof roar and be
troubled. You cannot do anything with the
sea when it rages. Think of the noise, the raging
that the waters make. Well, there's no need to fear
noise, is there? Sometimes it's very annoying.
As Brother Randy pointed out this morning before church, the
Lord sitteth upon the flood, yea, the Lord sitteth king forever. Don't give way to panic. God
is God. What is your present trouble?
Whatever they be, you must not let yourself be buried in despair. Hope on, hope ever. He can deliver
from the jaw of the lion and he will deliver without fail
his trusting people. The Lord liveth and blessed be
my rock. As long as the Lord lives, our
hope lives also. The believer will not be forsaken.
It pleased the Lord to make you His people. If heart and flesh
both fail, God will be the strength of your heart and your portion
forever. The Lord Jesus has made an end
of dread, fear, horrors for His people. Whether we live or die,
it is okay. We shall dwell eternally in His
presence. We're secure in Christ Jesus. Let the world crash around us. We will not fear. May God help
us to look out of the windows of our bodies and our refuge. Not at the storms, but to look
out at our refuge, the Lord. What will you sinners do in the
time of calamity? Times such as the psalm talks
about here. What must the ungodly be in for?
They don't have any confidence to live by day by day. Well,
you better take the poet's advice. Ye sinners, seek his grace, whose
wrath ye cannot bear. Fly to the shelter of his cross,
and find salvation there. A fortress firm and steadfast
rock is God in time of danger, a shield and sword in every shock
from foe well-known or stranger. Beloved, I do hope that there
have been some of these things that have been said here this
morning that has built your confidence in the Lord. and that you go
out of here with a believing heart, with a believing soul,
that you will say, I am a believer. Now, you said this once. You
said it in your confession of Christ, and you said it in your
baptism, I am a believer. Shall eternity reveal that you're
an unbelieving believer? Or are you going to live and
go out of this world believing God? Well, I want to believe
God. That's what I want to do. I want
to believe Him to the end. And I want to die the death of
the righteous. And those of you that know not Christ, I don't
know what you're going to do. But the Bible says you kiss the
Son. And I think you kiss the Son by embracing Him in the promise
of salvation. Now I do know that blessed are
the eyes that see those things that the Lord has revealed about
Himself. And I do know that none hear the Word of God and none
see, spiritually speaking, apart from it being given to them.
But I do believe that if there is a seeking sinner There's a
seeking Savior. And I do believe that you would
never seek the Lord if He wasn't seeking you. So if you're seeking,
seek on. Seek on. He'll be found. He'll be found. I tell you, He'll
be found. Seek the Lord. Seek Him with
all of your heart. And you believers, you that have
professed faith in the Lord, let's encourage one another.
Let's build up one another. Let's talk to each other about
the faithfulness of God, the goodness of God, and the loyalty
and dependability of God. Faithfulness, faithfulness. The
God who called us is faithful, and we can trust Him. Read and
meditate on this psalm this week, and may the Lord bless these
truths to your heart. I'm going to be away