Bootstrap
Chris Cunningham

God Hates Divorce

Matthew 19:1-15
Chris Cunningham March, 17 2013 Audio
0 Comments

Sermon Transcript

Auto-generated transcript • May contain errors

100%
Matthew 19, now this passage
I read, as I said, it's not one that's easily understood
on the very surface of it, what our Lord's teaching. And that's
often the case in the Scriptures. Even when we think we understand
the Scriptures easily, there's a reason why Paul said, study
to show thyself approved unto God. We can't just read the Lord's
word casually and think that we understand it. Comparing scripture
with scripture, we pray for His grace to reveal His truth to
us. And that's my prayer this morning. The first two verses
now, we'll talk about just for a moment. The Lord, it says when
He had finished these sayings, the things that we looked at
in the previous chapter, He departed from Galilee and came into the
coast of Judea beyond Jordan and great multitudes followed
him. We know what the scripture is
talking about when it says great multitudes because it sometimes
numbers them. When it used the word multitude
concerning the miracle of the loaves and the fishes, there
were 5,000 men plus women and children. I'd call that a multitude. I'd say that's quite a few people
and maybe more here because time had gone by. The Word had gone
forth of the miracles that the Lord did and the words that He
spoke. But it says that these great multitudes followed Him
and He healed them there. He healed the multitudes of every
imaginable ailment. Many are mentioned in the Word
of God. And there's one qualification
about them all. There were very, very, very many
different things, blindness and lameness and diseases that were
incurable. But there was always one qualification
about those who are mentioned in the word of God that came
to him for healing. They were helpless to do anything
for themselves. Like the woman who had spent
all that she had and was only worse. Like the leper who came and had
no doubt whatsoever of the Lord's ability and only came to find
out if the Lord was willing to have mercy on him. Like the woman of Canaan whose
daughter was grievously vexed with the devil. Can you imagine? And she came and took her place
as a mercy-begging dog at the Master's feet. These people had
all despaired of self, and that's the picture here. People who can work it out themselves,
who can decide their way out of their problem, will never
come to the Lord Jesus Christ. They'll come down an aisle. They'll
come to the false Jesus of religion, but they won't come to the master.
They won't come to the sovereign one who they despise by nature
until they have to. And then the Lord's gracious
to cause us to have to. Thank him for his grace to bring
us to that, to shut us out to him. What a beautiful picture. If
you can walk an aisle and be saved, then that's exactly what
you'll do. If you can read a scripted prayer
and be saved, then that's what you'll do. We're all a nature
like Naaman the leper, whose servant said unto him, if the
prophet had given you some great thing to do, you would have done
it. And oh, religion talks about how great it is for you to make
a decision for the Lord. How great it is for you to walk
in the aisle and repeat this prayer. And they do it. They'll do a
lot of things that someone has told them will save them. They'll
dutifully read the Bible that they can't understand a lick
of. And they'll fight through it because they think it's going
to make God happy with them. They'll come to a church and
sit there and count the ceiling tiles and look at the pretty
women or the good-looking men and play Angry Birds on their
iPhone 5 and sit there and then go home thinking, well, I did
my religious duty today. They'll walk down that aisle
and rededicate their lives over and over and over again because
after all, when they walk the aisle the first time, that only
goes so far. It's only good for so long. But
if you're worse off than that, and you know it. If you're the
leopard that can't change his spots. If every time you try to rub
off one spot, you make two more. If you're laboring or heavy laden,
and you got to have rest. If you find that you cannot do
anything that's not evil, falling short of the glory of your God, if you find that your nature
didn't magically change when you walked that aisle and said
that prayer, if you've done all you know to
do and you're only worse, Then you need the son of God
to do something for you that you cannot do for yourself. That's
what these folks came. That's what they came for that
day. And he healed them there. And that's the spiritual teaching
of this text and every text of scripture. Everyone. And then it says, the
Pharisees also came unto him, tempting him and saying unto
him, is it lawful for a man to put away his wife for every cause? Just because he feels like it. Just because, just make up some
excuse to divorce his wife. And notice the words put away.
We'll see them again elsewhere in scripture. And everyone knows
just from history that Roman society was notoriously wanton
and adulterous and Immoral and the Jews had been greatly influenced
by the Romans who had conquered them and and so That it was then
like it is now in our society. This isn't hard for us to imagine
This is not a question that sounds foreign to our ears Marriage was meaningless to most
people then just like it is now Just exactly like it is now It's
just stated the way it is. It's meaningless to most people. And if it means nothing to you
before you're married, then it will mean nothing to you after
you're married. And that's why there's so much
divorce. It's more common now to divorce
than it is to not divorce. And many don't even bother getting
married anymore. They just do what they want for
as long as they want, with whom they want, and then walk away. And I'll tell you this, young
people laugh at old-fashioned people like me. Let me say this
to the young people here and to all young people. You have
no idea what you're throwing away. the preciousness of what
you're throwing away, when that relationship and that
commitment means nothing to you. You have no idea. Love and honor, commitment, devotion,
trust, these are not dispensable things. not without great and
terrible consequence. I've seen the devastating consequences. And I also, by God's grace, know
God's truth concerning this. And young people dispense with
all that's decent and then wonder later why their lives are a train
wreck. Don't wonder about it. It's not
a mystery. The Pharisees here considered
themselves better than the average citizen and they wanted to expose
outward sin in others. Does that surprise you about
them? Then and now? But in doing so, what they exposed
was their own inward sin. The Lord saw to it that it worked
out that way. Religion today, by the way, is
exactly the same. They love to talk about sin and
expose and condemn outward sin. And that sounds good. There's
a lot in the Word of God about sin and the degradation and immorality
of sin and how God hates sin. They can pick scriptures out
all over the place to talk about that. And preach against sin,
against pornography, and adultery, and drugs, and alcohol. And religious
people love to hear about it. Love it. They're just exactly
like these Pharisees, of whom the Lord said in Matthew 23,
25, Woe unto you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites. For you
may clean the outside of the cup and of the platter, but within
they're full of extortion and excess. Religion's always dealing
with the outside of the cup. You need to quit doing this and
you need to start doing that. But the Lord said, you blind
Pharisee. How blind you are. Cleanse first
that which is within the cup and platter, that the outside
of them may be clean also. Now think with me about that
passage of scripture right there. You're blind. You're talking
about quitting this and starting that and cleaning the outside
of the cup, but you're not dealing with what's on the inside. You're
dealing with the effects, but not the cause. Well, let's think
about that for a minute because it goes to the heart of our text
this morning. The Pharisees' attitude when
they ask this question has everything to do with our Lord's answer
to it. Everything. And here's the two issues that
are dealt with in this condemnation of our Lord. Because they clean
the outside and not the inside. He calls them blind hypocrites. First is that what the Pharisees
prided themselves on not being outwardly is exactly what they
were on the inside where it counts. They were just good at hiding
it outwardly. They weren't clean on the outside. The Lord just
said the only way the outside is going to be clean is if you
clean the inside. They weren't clean inside or
out. They just talked about the out and tried to do things in
such a way that they appeared clean on the outside, but their
problem was on the inside. They condemned adultery, but
they themselves were spiritual adulterers. They hated God. You remember in Hebrews 12, 16,
Esau was called a fornicator for selling his birthright. You
remember when we talked about that? He was called a fornicator
for selling his birthright. What in the world does that have
to do with that? What does that selling his birthright
have to do with that? Well, the word fornicator there
means one who can be had for a price. Someone who will sell out if
and when it's to their advantage to do so. That's spiritual. Fornication to sell his birthright,
that which God had blessed and and ordained, and was His outward
means by which He blessed the firstborn in picturing the Lord
Jesus Christ, the firstborn from the dead. These things which
picture Christ in the Old Testament, they were precious and ordained
of God, and to be honored as Christ Himself is to be honored.
To dishonor that is to dishonor the One who ordained it, and
to dishonor the One who is pictured in the ordination of it. And
he was a spiritual fornicator because he could be had. He sold
that which was precious for that which his flesh desired. It's exactly the same thing as
physical fornication, just in the spiritual sense. And the very things that they
condemned were exactly what they were. And that's what our Lord
pointed out. Now the second thing is this,
the problem on the inside must be dealt with in order to truly
accomplish the cleaning of the outside. That's what our Lord
said, that the outside may be clean also. It's not going to
be unless the inside is dealt with. In other words, you don't
need new habits. You need a new nature. You don't need to quit doing
things and start doing things. You need a new heart. And then
you'll quit doing some things and start doing some things. As our Lord promised, the outside
will be changed. But there's got to be a change
on the inside first. And religion focuses on the cleaning
of the outside. They preach against every manner
of evil deed, but they do not preach Christ, who alone can
change the heart. The way God changes a sinner's
heart is by the power of the Gospel that Paul said, I'm not
ashamed of. That Gospel that he gave me to
pray. It's the power of God unto salvation. It's the power of
God. It's the means that God uses
to give that new heart. To give faith in His Son. To
change a sinner from a rebel to a child. And then a child
acts different than a rebel. That the outside may be clean
also. Hearts are not changed by preaching
against sin. Hearts are changed by the preaching
of Christ crucified. And having said that, let me
just say that most of the problems in our society, and in every
society that has problems, are caused by the root problem of
the breakdown of the family. as God has instituted marriage
and family order in His Word. And every time young people somewhere
disregard that and just do what they want to do because they
want to do it for as long as they want to do it, they're part
of the problem and not part of the solution. And every time
a wife doesn't dutifully, as God has commanded, submit to
the will of her husband and be What the Lord has ordained her
to be in the family under his order, part of the problem. Families are a shambles and our
society is a shambles. And there's cause and effect
there. And there's no honor, there's no respect, there's no
love, there's no commitment. No question about that. But the
question is, what's the solution? That's what our Lord talking
about here. It's not a political solution. It's a spiritual one. It can't be legislated. If the
outside of the cup is going to be clean, there must be a work
done on the inside, on men's hearts. It's going to start with
the word of God. Not in Washington. Turn to Malachi 2. We must read this in relation to our text this morning. This teaches
the same spiritual truth that our Lord is teaching in our text.
Malachi 2.13. and this have you done again,
covering the altar of the Lord with tears, with weeping, and
with crying out. You come, you know, and I've
seen them doing it, coming down to the old time altar, you know,
and weeping and carrying on. There's not even an altar that
the Lord has ordained now. The Lord's our altar. The Lord's
our sacrifice. He's our priest. He's our all
in all now. So there's no such thing as an altar now, but they're
still coming to an altar. even when the Lord had an altar.
They were coming crying, and insomuch that He regardeth not
the offering any more, or receiveth it with goodwill at your hand."
God's not receiving what you're bringing. Why not? Yet you say,
wherefore? Why not? Because the Lord hath
been witness between thee and the wife of thy youth. against
whom thou hast dealt treacherously, yet is she thy companion and
the wife of thy covenant." Just because you don't think so anymore
doesn't mean it's not so, in God's eyes. And did not he make
one? We're talking about one man,
one woman. He made one. Yet had he the residue
of the Spirit, and wherefore one, that he might seek a godly
seed, Therefore, take heed to your spirit and let none deal
treacherously against the wife of his youth. For the Lord, the
God of Israel, saith that he hateth putting away." Why does
he say that? That's what we're getting to.
He hateth putting away. You remember those words, put
away? Can a man just put away his wife for any cop? God hates
putting away. For one covereth violence with
his garment. You may cover it up and hide
it, but you're killing the wife that you committed yourself to. saith the Lord of hosts. Therefore
take heed to your spirit, that you deal not treacherously. You have wearied the Lord with
your words, yet you say, wherein have we wearied him? When you
say, every one that doeth evil is good in the sight of the Lord,
and he delighteth in them. Or where is the God of judgment? When you turn the truth of God
into a lie, when you sing oh how I love Jesus and come to
church and say you worship in him but you disobey in everything
he said. Oh my. God hates putting away. He hates physical putting away
in the institution of marriage and he hates spiritual putting
away and spiritual adultery. The marriage of a man and a woman
is a picture of Christ in his church. It's not the other way
around. It's not that we look at what the Lord did and say,
well, marriage is, you know, that's kind of like marriage.
No, marriage is like that. That's why there is marriage,
is because of what the Lord did, his love for his bride, his commitment
to us, what he did for us in choosing us. Marriage is a beautiful
picture of that. It's a picture of the electing
grace of God. We choose our bride. And say,
she's mine. She's mine. It's a picture of the commitment
of the Lord Jesus Christ. He set his face like a flint
to do what was necessary to have me. It's like our purpose to
have my wife, whatever it took. In Ephesians 5, 23 through 33,
we know that that's where our Lord deals with that where Paul talks
about Christ in his church and how marriage is a beautiful picture
of that. We won't take time to read that this morning because
we have so much more to see. The Lord declares concerning
his people, his elect, in Hosea 2.19. Listen to what he says.
And this is why Paul dealt with it the way he did in Ephesians
5. The Lord said this concerning his elect people in Hosea 2.19. I will betroth thee unto me forever. That's what married you. Forever.
It's forever. The Lord said, Moses, because
of the hardness of your heart, permitted you to divorce. But
it wasn't so from the beginning. That's not what God instituted.
It's forever. Because His love and commitment
to us is forever. I will betroth thee unto me in
righteousness. in judgment, and in loving kindness,
and in mercies, I will even betroth thee unto me in faithfulness. And here's the result, and thou
shalt know the Lord." That's what this is about. It's
about love. It's about commitment. It's about
honor. It's about trust. It's about all of these things.
that we see in the marriage of our Lord to us. He betrothed us to himself. And
in the context of that passage, we just read from Hosea 2.19.
And in the context of that passage there, in the book of Hosea,
the Lord teaches his elect people by teaching Hosea of the love
of God for his sheep. He purposed to teach Hosea and
us through him of his love for us. And he did so in a very convincing
way. This is what marriage is now.
They're talking about, can somebody just divorce their wife for whatever
reason they want to? The Lord said, here's what marriage
is. This is what I ordained. You listen to this. Here's love.
He said to Hosea and Hosea, one, two, go, take unto thee a wife
of whoredoms, and children of whoredoms. How come, Lord? For the land hath committed great
whoredom, departing from the Lord. If you're going to have
to know, by God's grace, something of His love, then you need to
know something about the ones that He loves. And so Hosea did. And the book
tells the story of Hosea and Gomer and how that he took her
to himself as his wife and how that she was unfaithful to him.
It didn't change what was in her heart. And she went and she lived in
another house where she would receive other men. And Hosea
had been caused by God to love her. It's clear from the scripture
there. God didn't just command Hosea
to go and love a woman. He caused him to do it. He caused
him to fall in love with her because of what he did. It's
clear. But she lived in this house and
received other men and other lovers and Hosea never stopped
loving her. So he would see her neglected,
of course, and in need, and he would come, it says, and put
food and money and things on her doorstep so that she would
have what she needed. And Gomer would say, look what
my lovers have brought me. She didn't have any idea that
Hosea loved her like he did. Didn't care. And the language of the book
is such that at times it's difficult to say whether it's Hosea speaking
of Gomer or the Lord speaking of his people. As he talks about
how he took care of us, gave us corn and wine and silver and
gold, even when we despised him. But there came a day when all
of it was taken away. And Gomer was destitute and ugly
and was being sold as a slave. I've seen women like this. I
know kind of what she looked like a little bit. Have you?
The question is, do we see ourselves in Gomer? That's the question. Used up and ugly and destitute. And she was being sold as a slave
and God having just declared in the last verse of chapter
two, in verse 23, he said, I will sow her unto me in the earth,
talking about his elect, and I will have mercy upon her that
had not obtained mercy. She's not going to get any mercy
from her lovers. They got what they came for. They're gone.
She hadn't obtained any mercy, but I'm going to give her some,
the Lord said. And I will say to them, which
were not my people, thou art my people. And they shall say, thou art
my God. And then in the very next verse,
the first verse of chapter three, God says to Hosea, go yet and
love a woman, beloved of her friend, yet an adulteress. according to the love of the
Lord toward the children of Israel. You go love her like I love you,
Hosea. According to the love of the
Lord toward the children of Israel who look to other gods and love
flagons of wine. And then Hosea said in Hosea
3, 2, so I bought her to me for 15 pieces of silver And for an
omer of barley and a half omer of barley, how much is that? It's what it took, that's what.
It was enough. And my Lord Jesus Christ bought
me with a price. He bought me with a price. You're
not your own, Paul said, for you're bought with a price. Do
we have any idea what it took? to purchase us. I know this, I know that Paul
said, I reckon that if he paid it, I ought to live for him from
now on and not for myself. And what he said, if he would pay that for me, then I ought to be just what
Hosea said here. He said, unto her, you shall
abide for me. Many days thou shalt not play
the harlot, thou shalt not be for another man, and so will
I also be for thee. That's love. That's love. So our Lord reminds these men
that though divorce was allowed by Moses, it was never the perfect
will of God. It was never what God ordained.
It was not so from the beginning. God hates putting away. The law of God concerning marriage
is a picture of his love for us. He said, they twain shall
be one flesh. And our Lord all through his
high priestly prayer in John 17 said that they may be one
with us. That's what Christ did for us.
He committed himself to becoming one with us, his people. He took
upon Himself our nature and united Himself to us forever. He said,
I will betroth you unto Me forever. There's no putting away. And
why does the Lord give this reason for divorce in the text? He said,
except for fornication. That was why, you know, that
was a reason that Moses allowed you to divorce one another. Well, that's instructive regarding
divorce, isn't it? But it's more than that. It's
so much more than that. And I'll tell you this, if all
that we can see and learn from this is the reason, an excuse
to divorce your wife, then we've missed it. And it's not, this is not given
here so that we can be like the Pharisees. here in the text,
and look down on those who are divorced for any other reason
than that. Then we'd be just like them. And we are by nature. That's easy to do. But if we
don't see the love of God for us here, we've entirely missed
Him. Just like many did that day. God had every right and every
reason to put us away. You see, that's what he's saying
there, except for fornication. That's lawful now for you. If that happens, then put her away. But the truth taught here is
that God had every right and every reason to put us away.
But he couldn't do it. I'd say Hosea had pretty good
grounds for divorcing Gomer, wouldn't you say? But he could
not do it. He could not because he loved
her. He loved her. Even though we were repulsive
and unfaithful and ugly and had thought all of the mercies that
he had shed upon us were what we gained by our own sinful efforts. He yet loved us. He so loved us that he gave his son for us to
live and to die for us. And that's what these Pharisees
would never understand. And apparently these disciples,
at least as of yet, didn't understand it. the one that spoke here,
and many of them because our Lord said not many can receive
this. You still talking about, they made a statement there that
shows that they had no idea the spiritual meaning of what our
Lord was teaching. They said, well if that's the
way it is, if you can't just get rid of your wife when you want
to, it's better not to have a wife. Can you see why our Lord said
not everybody will receive this? Who will receive it? Well, our
Lord tells us that those to whom it's given, those to whom it's
given, those who are the objects of his love, who he causes to
fall in love with himself. And notice this now, when he
says, not many can receive it, only they to whom it's given
will receive it. And think about what he's been
talking about, marriage and love and commitment, and how that's
forever, that's forever, and why it's forever. And then he
says, not everybody can receive what I said for, for, notice
that word, for. And this is important. After
teaching what he just did, he uses these words to reinforce
it. Now think with me. They mention not being married
as being preferable. If you can't get out of it, it's
better not to marry. And our Lord uses the word eunuch
in this next verse, which the sense of it there means this.
It has to do with willful abstinence from marriage. So he's taking
what they said and using it to teach them even further what
he'd been teaching them all along. That marriage is ordained of
God and that true marriage is unconditional love and unending
commitment and honorable devotion like that of God for His people.
And then he says this, there are different reasons why men
abstain from marriage. And he gives three here. And
he's talking about the Pharisees and those like them in the first
two for whatever reason. Men do it for self-righteous
reasons. We know that's true in the Catholic
Church today. It was true then, I'm sure too,
don't you think? They did it for self-righteous
reasons. We're going to devote ourselves to God and never get
married because we belong to the Lord and all this and never
have any idea of the love of God for sinners. But then he
said this, some do it for the kingdom of heaven's sake. Those
are the ones that he's just been talking about. The objects of
his love, the ones that he loves that way, love him this way. Is that clear there? Some do
it because like the apostle Paul said in first Corinthians chapter
seven, and in the words of our Lord here, for the kingdom of
heaven's sake. Read 1 Corinthians 7 later and
you'll see what I mean. Our Lord's words here sum up
what Paul said in 1 Corinthians 7, for the kingdom of heaven's
sake. In other words, for His sake.
For His sake. And these are the same ones who
can receive what the Lord taught here. He said not all will receive
it, but those to whom it's given. Who are they? They're the ones
that love Him Kind of like he loves them. And they're not married
in this life, but they are married to Christ and they know what
love is by God's grace. That's who he's talking about
here. And they know what our Lord is
teaching here because they've experienced it. I thought of this song as I thought
about this, and I love the words of it. It says, O hope of every
contrite heart, O joy of all the meek, to those who fall,
how kind thou art, and how good to those who seek. But what to
those who find, ah, this, nor tongue nor pen can show, the
love of Jesus, what it is. None but his loved ones know.
That's exactly what our Lord was teaching right there. He
said not everybody can receive this, but those who have committed
themselves to the kingdom of God by grace and because we love
him, those who love him, that's who that is. Those who are eunuchs
for the sake of the kingdom of God, They just flat love him,
and they love him because he first loved them, which is
what he'd been teaching all along. Let's bow in prayer this morning
and receive the table.
Chris Cunningham
About Chris Cunningham
Chris Cunningham is pastor of College Grove Grace Church in College Grove, Tennessee.
Broadcaster:

Comments

0 / 2000 characters
Comments are moderated before appearing.

Be the first to comment!

Joshua

Joshua

Shall we play a game? Ask me about articles, sermons, or theology from our library. I can also help you navigate the site.