I have heard you may remember
my. Message. Verses where I read where he
talks now on three and a half hours. But I heard trouble down
in the middle of the night. Now I'm stepping away from or
burying one another. for giving one another wireless
microphone. Above all, verse fourteen, I
am walking back to put on above which is the bond of that which
holds together everything which cracked the crown of maturity. Verse fifteen, let the peace
of God rule in your hearts. Peace which Christ made, peace
which God healed by. I am without peace, which God
has ordained for his people, that they be peacemakers, that
they not be quarrelsome or troublesome, or those who are cantankerous and
troublesome, but peacemakers, to which you're called. They
said you're called to be peacemakers. Peaceful, loving, gentle, kind.
This is the fruit of the Spirit. He says, put this on every day,
by God's grace, in one body, and be ye thankful, he said.
Believers are, and are to be, the most thankful people on earth. Nothing more dishonoring to God
than for his people to be murmurs, or complainers, or discontent.
It's a, it's a denunciation of what they say they believe, that
God is sovereign. Verse 16, let the word of Christ
dwell in you richly in all wisdom. Whatever you dwell on is what
dwells in you. And that's a, an injunction to us there. Verse 17, now here's the rule,
in verse 17, If we walk according to this
rule, then all of these things, this will enable us, by God's
grace, to put these things on. Verse 17, whatever you do, whatsoever
you do, in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus,
for His honor, for His glory, and being mindful of Him. In his name, give him thanks
for everything. Remember Paul said, in everything
give thanks, everything. High or low, rich or poor, up
or down, sickness or health, whatever it may be, in everything
give thanks for. This is the will of God in Christ
Jesus concerning him. This is God's will. If it were
not God's will, it would not be. If it is, it is God's will. In everything, give thanks to
God and the Father by Christ, in faith to Christ. All right,
now verse 18 is where we pick up this morning. Verse 18. And the Lord is dealing with
relationships now. He says, whatever you do, whatever
you do. And now He's going to give all,
every relationship, every relationship, husbands, wives, parents, employees,
that will cover everyone in this room, children. And He's going
to deal with these relationships. And where these things that he
just told us are so vital, these things that he just commanded
us and told us to put on, we need to use or put on in these
relationships, in these whatever we do, wherever we are. All right,
look at verse 18. It begins with wives. Wives,
verse 18. Submit yourselves unto your own
husbands. This fits in the law. And he begins, these instructions
begin with women. Why is that? Not because a woman has more
responsibility. Not at all. And we're going to
look at this relationship. as it is in Christ. Christ is
the husband, the bride, the church is his bride or wife. And certainly the church does
not have more responsibility to Christ than Christ does, not
at all. And I believe the reason he begins
with the wife, with the woman, is not because she has more responsibility
to her husband, but because it is more difficult, it is more
difficult for the woman to submit to her husband. So he begins with the woman.
Besides, in the garden, we're going to look at that in a moment.
In the garden, that's where the problem began. Did it not? So he begins with the woman and
the difficulty of flesh in this thing of submitting to a man. And sometimes, and many times,
he is an unbelieving man. that she must submit to. He is
an unreasonable man. Even believing husbands can be
unreasonable. So, the first command goes to
the woman. Why submit? Submit. But, but, but, what, what, what?
There's no ifs, ands, or buts about it. Submit unto the husband. Look at Ephesians 5 where he
goes into a little more detail. Ephesians chapter 5. Mark Ephesians
5 will come back and forth through this because he deals a little
more in depth with these very things. Ephesians 5. Now he said,
Why submit yourself unto your own husband as it is fit in the
law? Ephesians 5, verse 22, he says,
Why submit yourselves unto your own husbands? How? As unto the Lord. Let's read
on. For the husband is the head of
the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church, and as he
is the Savior of the body. Therefore, as the church is subject
unto Christ, so let the wife be to their own husbands in everything. Submit yourselves unto your own
husbands as unto the Lord. Now, why is this written as it
is? Why is this command given? Well, number one, it's God's
will. God made the command. This is
God's Word. So we really don't even need
to ask questions after considering that, right? God said it. It
must be right. Right? God said it. It is right. You really don't
need to go on any further and qualify. God said it. It's fit. That's what he gave
there. He didn't go on any further in
Colossians. He just said it's fit. It's right in the law. But there
is a reason. God, everything he does, he does
in wisdom. or a purpose, and it's a good
one. In everything in life, in everything,
there is a chain of command. In everything, there is a leader.
There is one voice. You cannot have two persons in
command. Our Lord said you can't have
two masters. They can't be done. You can't
have two voices. And some of them want to disagree
and give differing commands. And so this thing of a, well,
just look at anything, whatever it may be, whether it be work
or armed services, whatever, there's always somewhere where
the buck stops here. This is the one who answers,
who is the voice of leadership. It's just impossible. Go to Genesis
chapter 3. Genesis chapter 3. Let's look
at why this whole human race fell into the mess that it's
in. are more, well I shouldn't say
more important. Do you see how vitally necessary
they are now, at this day, as much or more than ever? This
world is absolutely in chaos because there are no roads. There
are no roles anymore. There's no chain of command and
no absolute authority. The problem begins in the pulpit. That's where the problem has
begun. God is no longer God, and therefore
there's no longer any chain of command or authority on that
line. At any rate, it all started with
this. Man and woman were not created
equal in authority, per se. They were created equal before
God, but there was still a position that the woman was created as
a helpmate, not a spokesman, a co-master. Well, look at Genesis
chapter 3, verse 16. Our Lord said to the woman, I
will greatly multiply thy sorrow. Why? Why did this happen? Because she took it on herself
to answer for her husband. She took it on herself to assert
what she should have said. My husband's in the head, and
he was the first man. You deal with him. Right? And verse 16, so God said
to her, I'm going to greatly multiply thy sorrow and thy conception,
and sorrow thou shalt bring forth children, and thy desire, that
is, whatever you desire, it's going to be subject to your husband. It's going to be subject to your
husband. You're not going to be able to do anything without
his. He's going to be your leader. He's going to rule over you.
Is that what it says? Is that what it says? Who said
that? Paul obeyed his master in the
name of Paul? Guts. Oh yeah, but who are now to reply
against you? Paul, just in 1 Corinthians 14
and 1 Timothy, he deals with these things about the woman
keeping silence, men in subjection, and so forth. And women the world
over are up in arms about it. And preachers, since they're
such silly men and women pleasers, those men who have led silly
women captive, doing and saying all that they do to please those
women who do not like what that bachelor named Paul said. So
therefore, they skirt around it. No pun intended. Skirt around
it. Paul is just repeating what God
said in Genesis 3. The very first injunction to
that woman, well, you're going to be in subjection forever. Well, I bet Eve didn't say but.
I'm quite certain Eve thought, I wish I had this. I wish I had. Back to Ephesians
5. Ephesians 5, it's not to say
the husband is right in everything, not by any means. But this is
the order in which God has placed it, and if you follow this order,
things will be all right. Ephesians 5, and look at how
he says the woman is to submit, verse 25, I'm sorry, verse 23,
as Christ, verse 22, as unto the Lord, as unto the Lord. He
is the one who gave you that husband. He is the one who put
you under him or in him. And so, therefore, this is of
the Lord. All right, now, the next relationship with the husband,
back to the text. In Colossians 3, verse 19, husbands,
love your wives. Be not bitter against them. Husbands,
love your wives. Ephesians 5. Husbands, love your
wife. Wait a minute, I'm married here,
I haven't lowered them. Why would he say that if
you're married? Of course you love your wife.
Maybe not. You see, this is not a passive command. This is an active injunction.
Love your wife. See what it's saying there? It's
an active injunction. Like Peter said in his letter,
let us love one another perfectly. Husbands, love your wives. Love your wives. It's not passive,
it's not lip service, it's active. Do it. Don't say it. Don't just let it be taken for
granted. Don't just think that it's understood. Make it certain that it's not. Love her. How? How? How are we to love our wife?
Well, we've got two perspectives. Husband says, this is vital.
Don't marry her unless you intend to. Ephesians 5 verse 25 says, Husbands,
love your wives, wives how? As Christ loved the church and
gave himself. How are you to love your wife?
How am I to love my wife? As Christ did the church. Now
you want to tell me who has the bigger responsibility? Love your wives. As Christ loved
the church. How did Christ love the church?
Did he sit around and let the church wait on him? No. Did he sit around and expect
those disciples? He watched their duty. As Christ loved the church.
Was his a mere lip service, a mere passive love, or did he know,
they know I love them? That's Christ's love to your
wife. I hate the term people use, make
love. That's bad. Most of it's just
sex is what they're talking about. But in this real sense here,
make love to your wife. And that's not, I'm not talking
about physical romance. I'm talking about, I'm hurting.
Do things to show your love, prove the sincerity of your love
for her, as Christ did. How did Christ love her? Verse 25. Here's the surest evidence. He did the most that he could
do to prove his love for her. What? Gave himself for her. He just doesn't give the church
a check. He gave himself. How am I to love my
wife? Give yourself to her. Now listen very carefully. Listen
very carefully to me. I hope I listen. A man does not
love his wife who spends all his time, his money, whatever, on himself. He does not love his wife. If
he does most of what he does for himself, doesn't love your
wives as Christ loved the church and gave himself to her. He was her servant, right? But
she was created to be his servant. I mean, yeah, but what did Christ
do? He serves her. The man who thinks of himself
first before he thinks of his wife, he doesn't love his wife. The man who thinks first of himself,
what am I going to do today? And does not consider his wife. He's merely a husband on paper. And I'll remind you what Scripture
said, he that loveth not actively. That man who does not love his
wife like Christ loved the church doesn't know God. He who loveth
not knoweth not God. It's a serious thing. We need to seriously listen.
And the same goes for a man or a woman or a woman for that matter.
The same goes for those parents who, how they treat their children. Relationships. How a man, a father,
a mother, treat their children. How does
our Heavenly Father treat his children? Has mere possession? Or does he love us? Does he do
for us? Does he love us freely and willingly
and actively? You know, many men and women,
many men and women have children just for the sake of that issue.
So they can say they have children. It's especially true of men,
it really is. It's kind of like possessions,
you know. There was a fella out in Texas who bought Cadillacs. He bought an old Cadillac he
could find and buried it in the sand, nose down. Buried his Cadillac,
trailed in this. But anyway, he just did that
so he could say, I've got this 59 Cadillac, I've got a 58 Cadillac,
you've got all these Cadillacs. He didn't do nothing with them. Total waste. I have all these
Cadillacs, you know, possessions. And listen to this, and this
is so true. Men, we need to listen to that
carefully. Most men, well, many of them,
never helped, really helped in the raising of their children.
The woman, all of the responsibility and everything is laid upon the
woman. But when those children get grown,
when they get grown, then the man takes a look at them. Then
he'll say, look at what happened to your dad, look how he turned
out. Possessions, look at my son, look at my daughter. That's sad, isn't it? All right. Husbands, love your wives actively. As Christ loved the church and
gave himself, not money, himself. If I took a poll this morning
of wives and asked, which would you rather have? The biggest,
finest home, finest car, all the modern convenience, or a
loving, caring, constant husband. Which would it be? It would be
endless. I'll take the man about the house.
I'll take him loving, loving around. Provided he's sane. All right, but back to the text.
Colossians 3. Verse, well, no, I didn't want
you to turn yet. Look at, real quickly, one more
time, in Ephesians 5, look at how we men. Now, I'm going to be more with
us men because, like I said, we have the greater responsibility. Verse 28 to 29, every man in
here better be looking at Ephesians 5. Verses 28 to 29, all men ought
to love their wives as their own bodies. He's in love with
his wife, in love with himself. No man ever gets AIDS on flesh. How do you treat your own flesh?
How do you treat it? Nourish it. Cherish it. Cherish
it. Nourish it. What's nourishment? Pimper. Cherish it. Pimper. appease, appease and please. You please your loved one. You
know it. You pamper it. You do things
for your own body that your body likes to have done to it. That's
what they say. Love arrives like that. Pamper
her. She wants love. Who has the very
responsibility? Now, this is the commandment
of Christ, now, which is not... Now, men might even say, well,
that's Paul, he's never been married, he doesn't know. He's
a bachelor, he doesn't know how difficult it is. No, this is
Christ. Christ, and He'll have these
wives. He said Solomon had five wives. Having wives through that was
our Lord had. And He cares for them all. He's not married to a woman,
he's married to you. Let me ask you a minute,
let me ask myself, would we be a good wife to the husband we're
married to? Isn't that a good question? Isn't that a pretty good question? Wouldn't that be a pretty good
question? Would I be, if I was the role model, would I be a
good husband to me? A good wife to me? Right, Pam? Honest. You're honest with me, aren't
you, with that? It's not too late to start. No, I'm agreeing
that it's not too late to start. Just add 60 and start over, okay? Honeymoon's our family. Husband, love, you're alive now.
This is not a request, this is not an option, this is not...
Now, this is a command of the Lord Jesus Christ. You love your
wife now? You want to keep her and the
children? You want life? I'm not going
to love you like you love your wife. If you don't love your wife like
I love you, I don't love you. As I said, it's, oh my, a greater
responsibility on us, a greater difficulties for the woman. All right, now look at what he
says here in Colossians 3. He says, don't be bitter against
them. Verse 19. Those who love your
wife, be not bitter against them. Bitter. Now, they have to go
back to the garden. What happened in the garden?
The old woman didn't listen to her, and she sure didn't, and
got them into a mess. Adam was not deceived. Adam entered
into the transgression of womanhood. And what a product of Christ
this is, that Christ took the sin off his body. He took the
sin off his body. That's the reason that happened
right there. Adam could have saved them, but oh, he didn't. You shouldn't have done that.
I'm not one of them." He did it really well. He entered into
the transgression with his wife. Another time I'll probably say it, but
it all started there. The woman should have consulted
her husband, but she didn't. Well, then he pardoned unto her. Our Lord said in Genesis 3, He
said, Because he hearkened unto your rhyme. I don't know if you can tell
that story. I saw it and went and wrote it and told it. Because
he hearkened to your rhyme. Well, what happened? Adam got
bitter against her. Adam became bitter against her,
and he blamed her. He blamed her for his problems.
That's what that means. Don't be bitter against her.
She's not your problem. Eve was not his problem. He did
it to eliminate her. Eve wasn't to blame for his sacrifice.
Do not be bitter against him. And I'm certain of it. Most,
if not all of us, meet at one point and say, if I wasn't married,
I'd be. Yeah, what would you be? You'd be right where you were
when you got married. A mess. Be not bitter against
them. Be not bitter against them. Remember who it was that made
the big glowing promises before we got married. Who did all the
talking? Who did all the talking? Who
had all the grand, glorious plans? I don't know. I'm not even moving
that. You sell it for a trader. So
that's what you sell it for, isn't it? No, some do. He sells it for a man. Who made all these grand, glorious
promises? Huh? Who, who did all the talking? Who moved with who into this? Huh? Who's to blame for this? That's what we're getting. Who's to blame? Who determines
the general Who is it that guides and leads in the direction the
home is taking and the general demeanor of the home and the
peace and so forth? Who's the head of the home? Who's
the spiritual leader? Who is it? It's not the woman. It's the man. Don't be bitter against him.
Don't be bitter against him. Don't be bitter at anybody, but
be bitter at yourself. And we need to ask, every one
of us men need to ask ourselves, what happened to that sweetheart
love for that girl from 140 years ago? Can't live with him, can't live without him. That's just the
cross of the word saying it. That's a bad saying. Where the
scripture says, man can dwell with God. But according to knowledge,
considering who it was that made all the promises and who it was that determines the outcome,
it's the man. Don't blame her. Don't be bitter
against her. Do you see what he's saying there?
He has no reason to fear himself. It's his problem. Verse 1. I told you why I didn't
look down on men, but I am a man. I have no purpose. Verse 1. Children. I ask that these children
be witnesses this morning in front of the classes. Children. Children. That's wrong. You were looking at it? You were
wrong. Obey your parents in all things. This is what we can learn
from the Lord. Obey your parents in all things. All things? All things? All things. All things. This is their character. No, they don't. Knowledge is
accumulated. Knowledge takes years to accumulate. You don't get knowledge. You
really don't. History of these people, that
all they ever do is these bookworms, these really intellectual people,
they're nutcases. They're crazy. Everybody comb
their hair. Of course. Why? All science. Take out the
last time first. Why? You never comb your hair.
Why? Of course. Study and make man. So I do practical things. Books are a book, yes. Study
subjects and learn, but you don't learn anything. I studied for
a book. Doctors go to school for eight
years and they study books and they know inside and out these
terms, the terminology of various diseases and medicines and so
forth. They don't learn anything until they open that body up,
until they treat the disease. until they actually had a hands-off.
So they go through an internship. You ask any doctor, they learn
all that they learn through their internship by working 8-12 hours
at the hospital. They learn all that they learn
by experience. And it takes years. You don't
turn a doctor out. You don't turn people's bodies
over to them. You know, instead of right out
of what you're just working on. And after six months, after some
years, years, knowledge is accumulated. Wisdom is acquired. Wisdom is acquired from the use
of that knowledge over the course of years. You understand? Wisdom
is acquired by the use of that knowledge you've accumulated
over the years. wisdom to know. But a lot of
times, you can't even put into words what you know, what you've
experienced. You've experienced. You've acquired
that experience. It takes years to accumulate
knowledge and to have wisdom. Years of experience. Children
do not know. It's impossible for a young person
to understand many things. It's impossible. You cannot truly
know and understand anything unless you experience it. I can know something about
various illnesses. I can. But I really don't know
and understand unless I have had that experience. You understand
what I'm saying? I can know something about this
and I've had it, but I really don't know until I've experienced
it. Children are well prepared. They're
all ready. You don't know. You just don't
know and understand. But your parents know, and I'm
saying, even though they might not be able to give you a reason,
they don't have to give you a reason. They don't have to give you a
reason. You should never ask why. Really. So let's do this. Come on. Don't
do that. Don't say why. That often, you know, an honest
question is not bad. But sometimes, this is why I
said this, sometimes your parents may not be able to give you a
reason. Right, parents? Parents ought to be bringing
in, you're right. You hear that, fellas? May not
be able to put in words. Verbalize why it is that you've
been through it, you've experienced it. Something's wrong, I'm not
going to let you go here. Fine! I just don't feel like it's right.
I don't have a good feeling about this. You can't really put it into
words. But why? I don't know what to say. I can't,
I can't really say it. Listen very carefully. No loving
parent. Listen carefully. No loving parent
lets rules Well, they're consumed. As a matter of fact, they hate
to make rules because they know they're going to enforce them. You don't understand anything
of what I'm trying to say. You will talk about it. Remember when your dad, parents,
remember when your dad or mom used to say this to everybody
in the old church? Not every one of your parents used to say
that, right? Did you believe it at the time?
Did you? Oh, come on. You're going to
hit me like a bat. And it's going to hurt you, you
know what I'm saying? Dad? I was 6'3". Parents can
ask parents now. Those of you who were on the
other end of the barrel, Does it hurt you to punish him
for what he did to you? Yes. I've been there. I've been a child. I've had my
share. He didn't last long. He wasn't
long after I got to punish him to do bad again. More than bad. He second-guessed himself in
the last 48 hours. Because he's right. He's going
to be mad at me. He's going to be mad at me. I
don't want to, you know, I don't want them to know that I love them like that. A loving parent
never makes a ruble for a ruble's sake. Kids say things. He just, he just likes to read rules. None at all. None at all. A pastor. Oh man, my dad taught
me to serve. Don't break the rules. Don't
make them in anyway. If you do, you're going to have
to endorse them. And then you've got problems. They might be good rules. They
might be very, very good rules. But all in all, what's made,
and everybody doesn't know what I'm saying, and everybody won't
appreciate it. Everybody won't buy it. So be
careful what rule you make. It better be necessary. All fools are running after,
running after, running after those who love their children.
They're not fools for their own sake, but for the sake, they
say, for their salvation. Now, I'm saying this now because
I know that. I know I was your age. I know what I was doing. I know
what my parents were doing. I know what was going on in their
lives. I know this is just the right
thing to do. If you don't understand it now,
you will some day. And I may misrule, but I like
it a little for you. And what I'm doing is going to
be absolutely the best way that you can. Children will thank
their parents for all things. No questions asked. No questions
asked. And then someday you're going
to get there, or will I? I don't know. I don't know. And you're sitting on the side
of the room, the exact same room. And your children will say, but
you saw me in the room. No, I'm not. Go by
your parents. And, and, verse 21, I've got
the third. Father's for both, not just for the man. Let's say
he deserves father's. This is spoken about today. Spoken to men, huh? Because men
don't have a tender, nurturing nature than other animals do. Listen to the man. Listen to
the Word of God. Now, let's say he's been a mother
for college, for most country children,
for blacks, for Americans, because a father doesn't have the tender,
nurturing nature of a mother. She has had it most, since the
moment that child took his first breath, she was nurturing him
in her very personal, literally, nursing him on her very life.
in the very body and nursery of that child that she just had. We don't let her know what the
mother feels for him. And so the intentional
man, the father, comes for both the anger and tenderness, nurture,
for both the love and anger, A wise father will rule tenderly,
compassionately, and lovingly so as not to provoke them. Remember what perfection sin
is? No. Lest they be disturbed. Oh man,
we need this confession. Lest they be disturbed. Note
that, expect more out of your children than out of your son. Those bads are more critical
than they are encouraging. I know this from experience. More critical than encouraging.
People live out their lives so they were failures and so they
expect their children to be better than they had a higher chance
of. And the more critical, bads are
prone to do this. Bads are prone to be So rarely
everybody is encouraged to be more critical. We need to be
that person, more encouraged to be critical. I shouldn't be
encouraging. And I got those bags. And that's
when I quit. I said, I'm going to quit. I'm
going to quit. I'm going to quit. Next Sunday,
I'm going to be able to start. It's really not a chapter to
be in there. So this is a good place to stop.
You have trouble with the end of the story. You're a supervisor.
So it's not a bad place to stop. That's normal. That's normal.
You need to work with the power of the mind.