Mystery of marriage

I invite you to turn with me tonight to the book of Ephesians. Ephesians chapter 5. As a minister of Christ, what Paul calls a pastor-teacher, if you read that it says pastors and teachers. But what he's saying is a pastor teacher. And that's exactly what the commission in Matthew said to do. Go teach all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit. A pastor teacher and sometimes, not full time, but sometimes an evangelist. The apostle Paul told Timothy, he said, do the work of an evangelist. Don't neglect that. If opportunity arises, then be an evangelist. The scripture says that as a pastor, I'm a steward of the mysteries of God.

God has Revealed things to me. He's made known things to me and he's made me a steward of these things These things are precious things Precious things his grace his glory his gospel his people The work that he does They're great mysteries he said if the princesses of this world are had known this they would not have crucified the Lord of Glory.

These things are hidden from them. And I'm a steward of these mysteries and indeed I often weep in my study when I think about these revelations as God gives them to me. It's very humbling when You see something that you've read a hundred times and just could not enter into and all of a sudden you understand it. And you know it's not of yourself. This is something given to you. Things hidden, he says, from ages and generations.

Things prophesied but left in a mystery even to those who prophesied of it. That's what Peter talks about, those old prophets who had the spirit of Christ, they prophesied of these things and earnestly looked into them, trying to figure out what time he's talking about and what these things, who does this apply to? And he said, these things are revealed to us now by them who have preached the gospel with the Holy Ghost sent down from heaven. These things that the angels desire to look into.

So when the Lord makes a mystery known, it's a humbling thing, isn't it? People think you get these revelations and they make you proud. No, it's very humbling to get a revelation from God. So why preach on these things? Well, my reason for preaching are many. First of all, they're recorded in the word of God and I'm commanded to preach the word. We don't make up stories to tell. We try to take the word of God and set forth these hidden mysteries as they're revealed in the scripture. Make these things known. And that's what Paul told Timothy. He said, preach the word.

And then together these mysteries make up the gospel of God's sovereign grace in Christ, and I have a commission to preach the gospel. Go into all the world and preach the gospel. I don't know why anybody would want to preach anything else. There's no hope anywhere else. The gospel. The God spell, the good news. And then I know this. Here's another reason. I know the necessity of hearing. How shall you hear without a preacher? It's necessary to hear these things. There's no other way you're gonna get them.

Preaching is the means our God has chosen to save poor sinners. He said, in the wisdom of God, the world by wisdom knew not God. but it pleased God through the foolishness of preaching to save them that believe. This is God's way. This is God's means. And he talks about it a lot in the scripture.

Another reason I preach these things is because I know they work. I know they work because that's how God saved me. Did you know that's exactly what Paul told the Corinthians I delivered unto you first of all that which I also received, how that Christ died for our sins according to the Scriptures, was buried, and rose again the third day according to the Scriptures. That's what I received, and that's what I'm gonna tell you.

Now in Ephesians chapter five, Paul is exhorting the saints to understand and honor the marriage relationship before God and men. For the basis of it, he goes all the way back to the book of Genesis. When God joined Adam and Eve together, he said, she shall be called woman because she's taken out of man. Isn't that where Christ finds his elect? He takes his elect out of this world, out of man. Out of man. The bride of Christ is taken out of man, and the man shall leave his father, he said, and mother, and shall cleave unto his wife, and they too shall be one flesh.

And then having said these things, he makes this conclusion. Now, he says a lot of things. I'm not here tonight to try to fix anybody's marriage. I just want you to see the gospel in this. I want you to see the mystery of these things. And he's telling the man his obligations, and he's telling the woman her obligations. And then, he said in verse 32, look at it with me here. Ephesians chapter five, verse 32.

This is a great mystery. Now, when he talks about the mystery of the gospel, he calls it the mystery of the gospel. When he talks about the mystery of Christ, he calls it the mystery of Christ. But two times in the scripture, he uses the word great. By the grace of God, I hope to bring both of them, one tonight and one tomorrow. These are the two great mysteries.

And he said, this is a great mystery, but I speak concerning Christ and the church. At home, in rescue, and now here, I've been preaching on the mysteries of which I'm made a steward. And so far, I've preached on the mystery of the gospel, the mystery of God's will, the mystery of hope, and the mystery of faith. And by the grace and mercy of God, I hope now to deal with what the Holy Ghost calls a great mystery. Paul writes to the saints and says, this is a great mystery, but I speak of Christ and the church.

All right, so how is marriage a mystery, a great mystery? Untold volumes of books have been written about it. Hollywood produced untold movies about it. And marriage has been around since the beginning of time. So why is marriage here called a great mystery? What makes marriage such a mystery? Well, let me give you five things this evening. First of all, marriage is a mystery in the purpose of it. We've lost sight in our generation. Men and women have lost sight of the purpose of marriage.

In Colossians 1.16, it says, for by him, that is Christ, were all things created that are in heaven and that are on earth, visible and invisible, whether they be thrones or dominions or principalities or powers, all things were created by him and for him.

Marriage has to do with him. It's purposed of God. And when Christ did these things, he did these things in the light of what he comes to do. He's gonna manifest God's glory. He's before all things, it says in verse 17 of Colossians 1, he's before all things and by him all things consist or have a continuance or held in place. He, Paul said, is the image of the invisible God, the firstborn of every created thing, whatever it is.

I'm kind of going a long way around the barn, but I'll get there if you'll be patient. Our Lord said in the book of Isaiah, He said, you're coming here and you're going through the motions and you're, covering your face, and you're kneeling, and you're bringing oblations, and you're doing all these things. And when he gets done with that, he said, come now, let us reason together. Here's where I'm going with this.

Christ is the reason for everything. You can't reason with God apart from Christ. He's the reason. He's the reason for marriage. You want to learn about marriage, study Christ. He's the reason. It has to do with Him. It's patterned after Him. He's the reason for everything and there is no reasoning apart from Him.

And the reasoning of God in Christ is the glory of God in the salvation of sinners. Whatever marriage is, it has to do with our redemption and salvation. Marriage is ordained of God to picture our relationship to Christ. In fact, all relationships, brother, sister, father, mother. Whatever it is, all these relationships have something to do with His communicating to us our relationship with Him. We call God our Father. When God the Spirit comes in us and performs that act of adoption, makes us His children, what do we cry? Abba, Father. Well, how do we know what a father is? because of the relationships that He's given us.

He can communicate those things to us. It's ordained of God to picture our relationship to Christ and how His elect are born, blessed, made provision for, and it's a great mystery, a great mystery. But God, He said, has revealed them unto us by His Spirit.

All right, marriage is a great mystery in the purpose of it. Did you, I don't know if you ever noticed this. I preached all the way through the book of Genesis. And the very first message I preached was the beginning before the beginning. In the beginning, he said, let there be light. Now wait a minute, he didn't do the sun till on down the line, didn't he? What was the fourth or fifth day? Then he talks about hanging the sun and the heaven and the moon and the stars and all these various kinds of light. But here he said, let there be light and there was light.

What's he talking about? He's talking about the light of Christ, the light of redemption. All creation has to do with redemption. Global warming, what a mess. Paul said, all creation. The earnest expectation of creation, what's it waiting for? Why is God maintaining everything the way it is? The earnest expectation of creation waiteth for the manifestation of the children of God. That's what's going on. And then secondly, the mystery of marriage is how it comes to pass and it does come to pass. How does it come to pass? Seeing, hearing, desire.

Isn't that what, that's how it begins and how does our relationship with Christ begin? Seeing, hearing, He said, this is the will of God that sent me that everyone that seeth the Son and believeth on him may have everlasting life. You're not gonna come to Christ till you see him by faith. And you're not gonna see him without hearing. That sight is spiritual sight. It's not seeing with these eyes. And all of the things that involve faith in Christ, seeing and hearing, believing, Reasoning. How shall you believe on him of whom you not heard? And then what about this? Here's another thing involved in this thing of marriage. Need. The whole need not a position. The righteous don't need a savior. But Ruth needed Boaz, didn't she? And he needed her. And then desire.

Solomon wrote by the Holy Spirit, he said, set me as a seal upon thine heart, as a seal upon thine arm, for love is as strong as death. What a statement. One man told me, he said, I know the gospel's important, but we need a little law. I don't know where you're gonna find a little law. It's all or nothing, isn't it? You so much as be circumcised, you're obligated to keep the whole law. You need a priest, you need lambs, you need bullocks.

Gonna need a red heifer on occasion. Oh, the desire of the heart when it's fixed on Christ, when he shows you who he is. Listen to this. If you find my beloved, O daughter of Jerusalem, tell him that I'm sick of love. I'm lovesick. If you find him, tell him I love him. I can't stand to be without him. I have to have him.

It's a great mystery how a man and woman are brought together and see in one another what no one else sees. Marriage is a great mystery also. Secondly, as it comes to past, and then thirdly, marriage is a mystery in the bond of it. No paper, no register, no witness can hold two people together.

Faith, hope, and charity. Which one would you say was the greatest? God said charity. You know what charity is? Active love. Active love. It's not love purposed, it's love given. Husbands, love your wives as Christ loved the church. It's a mystery in the bond of it, and love is the bond of marriage. You don't need a law if you have love. Now, if you don't have love, you probably do need a little law. But if you have love, you don't need law.

We didn't make out a contract. Now you need to fix breakfast at eight o'clock, and here's what I want. And then she'll tell me what I need to do. We don't have that. We love one another. We love one another. And love is the bond of marriage, and it's the bond of our marriage to Christ, love. He loved the church. And this charity, this active love, it says, it suffereth long. Doesn't he suffer long with us? Oh, my soul. It's kind. Envyeth not, vaunteth not itself, is not puffed up, doth not behave itself unseemly, seeketh not its own.

You know, our Lord didn't own a square foot of property on this earth. It was His, He made it, but He didn't own one square foot of it. And the birds had nests, foxes had dens in the earth, but the Son of God had nowhere to lay His head. He didn't even think during the day where He was gonna go and rest.

He knew His Father would provide it, and He did. rejoiceth not in iniquity, it rejoices in truth, and it doesn't think evil. Oh, that woman, I know what she's up to. No, it doesn't think that way, not love. Love don't. And it bears all things, it believes all things, and it hopes all things, and it endures all things. Now listen to this, it never fails. Aren't you glad? Love never fails.

He chose us in Christ that we might be holy without blame before Him being loved. That's what that means, before Him in love, being loved. And nothing can separate you from the love of God which is in Christ Jesus our love. It's the bond for a lot of reasons, but it's mostly the bond because it's sufficient and effectual. Love doesn't fail. The bond is love.

Husbands, love your wives. I've heard a lot of sermons by men preachers who I think still think they're in boot camp. but they emphasize the woman's obedience to the man, as though they were the Sergeant Major, you know. But I've never heard one emphasize the love that they're commanded to have for their wives. Love your wives, and he doesn't just throw it out there and say, You work it out. No, he said, love your wives as Christ loved the church.

What's that mean? That means you give yourself to them. That's what that means. What makes marriage a mystery is the purpose behind it. how it comes to pass, the bond of it, and then fourthly, it's a mystery in the union itself. Salvation is union with Christ. Oh, I pray everybody in here understands that. Union with, there's no other way to be saved. If God has not put me into union with his son, then I don't, there's no way in the world I'm gonna be saved. You'll never enter into any understanding of Christ being made sin for us, or of us being made righteous in him, apart from this union.

A mysterious union. Our marriage is patterned after this union. God reveals the union as what he calls, first of all, a covenant union. Way back yonder in eternity, It was a covenant union. That's a promissory agreement. The triune God met together and made the promise, made the covenant, set the demands. And Christ said, I will, I'll do this, I'll do this. It's a promissory agreement, a sort of contract. And David's dying words were that God had made with him this everlasting covenant.

Why? Because it's ordered in all things and sure. What makes it sure? God appointed a surety, that's Christ. He's the surety of the everlasting covenant. The blood he shed on that cross is the blood of the everlasting covenant. That's what he tells us in Hebrews. It's the blood of the covenant. ordered in all things insure, and he said this, this is all my salvation. Covenant union with Christ, that's my salvation. God chose me in him, made full provision for me in him, and appointed him a surety to fulfill all its demands. covenant union. And then watch this. In the fullness of time, God sent forth his son, made of a woman. Why? To manifest this union. Made of a woman, made under the law to redeem them that were under the law.

To marry Ruth, Boaz had to come to the gate and redeem Ruth. The law held Ruth responsible. He couldn't have Ruth until the justice was satisfied, if I understand what I'm reading. And he came to the gate, that's the proper place to go, that's where the judge sat. He came to the gate, all involved were called to this place, and he redeemed Ruth. He established his rights for the bride, and he did it in a public manner. What happens when we get married? We assume whatever debt our bride has, because we're one. We take vows. There's a promissory agreement in taking vows. and was to take them before God.

When He came into this world, John described it this way. He said, the Word was made flesh. What Word? The Word of the covenant. The Word. All communication of grace in Him. And He came into this flesh. The Word of covenant promise. Word of union became a union. He became one with us. And having satisfied God, fully redeeming his beloved, he ascended back into glory, sent the Holy Comforter to us. And what's he do? He woos us with gifts of love. Isn't that what he does? Allows us to see him. allows us gifts to understand things about Him and His office and His will and He's abounded toward us in the mystery of His will.

This is what old preachers called a vital union. By faith and love, we embrace Him. I tell you, it's a sad marriage when only one embraces while the other stiffens up. That's a cold Mary, isn't it? What comes to pass in the believer, it presupposes a work of God in him, in him. When we talk about believing, We're not saying that this faith is in everyone. It's not. All men have not faith. But it presupposes a work. And when he talks about marriage, it presupposes this work of the Holy Ghost.

He works in us. What does he do? Brings us to Christ, draws us. Who draws us? The Father does. How does he draw us? Through the preaching of the gospel, through his providence, through the working of the Spirit of God. And he brings us to him and we embrace him.

That's why Paul calls this a great mystery. Great mystery. You know, a man and woman stand before a preacher and he asks them certain questions and they make certain vows and all of this before God. But you don't see these two just meld together. You don't see that, do you? And yet it presupposes an inward work and they're one. They're one. And that's what Paul's talking about here. He's talking about this union. Think about this.

Did you ever read in the word of God? I think it's in the book of Galatians and these people, boy, they were, it's either Galatians or Corinthians. It was a church where there was a lot of trouble going on. And Paul said he was jealous over them with a godly jealousy.

And he said, my aim is to present you to Christ as a chaste virgin. Well, how are you going to do that in Christ? In Christ. Do you understand that in Christ, this message of reconciliation that I'm attempting to preach to you tonight, this message of reconciliation, he said, to wit that God was in Christ, reconciling the world, not imputing their trespasses unto them. They've never been charged to them. Does that mean we never sin? Oh, we sin. But our sins were charged to Him, charged to Him. And the man who understands that, he's a chaste virgin in Christ. And oh, what peace, what joy, what comfort, what holy expectation fills the, it just floods the heart of those who see their union with Christ.

How awful and how failing is all their attempts in false religion. I don't even want to talk about how many aisles I walked down and how many times I knelt down at that little prayer bench up front and the elders gather around me and tell me how everything was okay when I knew in my heart that it wasn't. And finally one day, one of the elders said, everything okay? I said, no sir, no sir, it ain't.

Oh. sinless, pure, undefiled bride, no other way except by union with Christ. And then fifthly, marriage is a great mystery as to its priority. Well, certainly marriage has priority over all the affairs of this world. We know that, but that's not what I'm talking about. I'm talking about our marriage with Christ taking precedence over our earthly marriage.

In Ephesians 5.22, it says, wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, now listen, as unto the Lord. How do you submit yourself to the Lord? I know he's Lord and that we submitted ourselves to that authority, but that's not where the submission really is, is it? We submit to him because we understand who he is.

Perfect grace. He's the embodiment of every attribute of God. This is God come into the flesh. And we look at him and I see perfect love. Why wouldn't I submit to a man who loved me perfectly? He's perfectly gracious. I can't even fathom that. Merciful. Kind. Long suffering. Forbearing, you know what that is? That's putting up with. Forbearing. Oh. If you ladies could find a husband like that, you'd marry him, wouldn't you? Huh? Oh, there's nothing in him not to love. He's all wise. We can't even fathom his riches. He gives us all things, doesn't He?

That's what He said, all things are yours. The apostles that penned this book in the power of the Spirit, He said, they're yours. The apostles who did the same, they're yours. Pastors, preachers, evangelists, they're yours. How'd you get them? Our God gave them to you and our ascended Lord He said, gave us these things.

I love that story where Abraham sends out the trusted servant to get a bride for Isaac. And he loads up all these camels with all these gifts. And this guy's worried. I mean, he's taken a solemn charge from Abraham. Abraham wasn't a peon, Abraham was somebody. You didn't lie to Abraham. I mean, he was a wealthy man and a powerful man. He went over there and whipped them kings like they didn't exist. He was a powerful man. He sent that servant and that servant said, now wait, now wait. What if? And he starts in with all these questions. What if she ain't willing? What if she ain't the one? What if she won't listen? What if she don't say these words?

And he said, just leave her there. But if she's the one, here's what she's gonna do, here's what she's gonna say, here's what you're gonna ask her for a drink. She's gonna draw it for you, she's gonna give it to you. She's gonna do this, she's gonna do that. And so he tells her then about his master and his master's son, and she's just infatuated.

Yeah, I'll go, I'll go. And then he goes over and he pulls the tarp off that camel and begins to unload the gifts. Oh, wow. But isn't that exactly what God does for us? We hear about Christ. Will you come to Him? Yes. Yes. Where else can I go? I'm a sinner. And so I come to Him. And as I'm coming, And then I found out later even my coming was a gift. But He just loads us down with gifts and revelations and pastors and teachers and all the means are laid out. The covering. Covers us with His righteousness. Oh my soul.

Women are not to blindly follow their husbands but submit to them as unto Christ That is in the like manner. He's the way. Your husband walk in the way? Then follow him. Christ is the truth. Does your husband believe on him? Then listen to him. Christ is the light. Does he walk in the light as Christ is the light? The light of his mercy and grace, the light of his goodness and love, the light of his obedience and sacrifices, the light of his generosity and kindness, then follow him.

Submit yourself to your husbands as unto Christ. And that union we have with Christ is to be a pattern of our union with one another. There's a verse in Colossians 2 that applies here. I'll read it for you. It's in verse 6, Colossians chapter 2. He said, as you have therefore received Christ Jesus the Lord, so walk ye in him. The prophet asked this question, can two walk together except they be agreed? Can't do it, can you?

And I know marriage is a typical relationship, but so was natural Israel and they despised Christ. We're to understand marriage for what it is. It's a typical relationship, speaking to us of our covenant union with Christ and of that actual spiritual union with Christ. This marriage is, but all marriages are not according to that union. They're just not. Our relationship must be genuine with Christ to be genuine with one another and be a godly marriage. And then lastly, marriage is a mystery by what it demands.

What does marriage demand? It demands what only God can produce. Isn't that what our marriage to Christ? It demands what only God... We were talking about this before the service. And Pastor Rick said, I've always struggled with that. If the righteous scarcely be saved, what's that mean? Well, what does God demand for you to be saved? You got to be the same as Him. You have to be as righteous as Him. You have to be as just as Him. You have to be just like God.

Well, if he saves you, he can bring you up to the top of the glass, but there's nothing above that. And when he brings you to that point, you're scarcely saved. If you're scarcely saved, where does the sinner and the ungodly man, where's he gonna appear?

Marriage is a mystery by what it demands. It demands all, that's what it demands. Love your wives as Christ loved the church. And what did he do? Gave himself. Somebody said God emptied heaven of its treasure. That's Christ. He thought it not robbery to be equal with God. He gave himself. And what's gonna happen when that comes to pass? He's gonna leave father and mother, gonna cleave to his wife. I looked that word up, but it's too complicated for me to try to define it.

There is an embrace. It means an embrace that you can't break. It won't break. You can't pull them apart. And he cleaves unto his wife. Listen to this over Matthew 10. He that loveth father or mother more than me, he's not worthy of me. He that loveth son or daughter more than me, he's not worthy of me. And he that taketh not his cross and followeth after me, he's not worthy of me. And he that findeth his life shall lose it, and he that loseth his life for me shall find it.

What a mystery, what a mystery. What a great mystery, he said. It's a mystery in its purpose, how it comes to pass, the bond of it, the union of it, the priority of it, and the heavenly demands of it. This is a great mystery, he said, but I speak of Christ and the church. May the Lord give everyone an understanding of these things.

Mystery of marriage

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Mystery of marriage

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